Spoony the Pussy One: Life is in the Render Queue

[Guest]

He's making fuck all, his retard bang skyrim slut is making fuck all, he proclaimed months ago that he was losing the house AND EVERYTHING, and yet he's streaming games like the walls aren't closing in. He's getting money. I hope someone can get to the bottom of where this money is actually coming from. It's certainly not Spoony earning it. Some kind of wealthy tranny sugar daddy? His brother/parents taking pity on him? Government fraud? Bogus injury lawsuit?

Could he have packed away some savings from back when he was at his peak popularity that he's slowly draining? How much was he making then, I wonder?

[Tony Schiavone]

This fake Twitter is truly doing some amazing charity work for the world. All the freak fishes trapped and caught in his net that get exposed. This is better than a honey pot.
Anywhoo...

Still searching for his true self!
Whether it be a bum, a con-artist...or a magical drunken girl with the skirt of Sephiroth!

Once again, boys and girls, it appears to be time...for...

Spoony's Panhandling Stream Roundup

[WISH I HAD A REAL LIFE FEMALE PERSONA Edition]

I tally it so you don't have to. All dollar amounts in USD, because burgerland = #1. Convert as necessary for your country.

Vital Statistics (Part One):

• Total time: 2:34:59
  Total haul: $159.98
  Begging Efficiency Per Hour (BEPH): $61.93. [Absolutely haram. While it does not have the sympathy prop of his dead "friend" to help donations, this is supposed to be Spoony's favorite series. Also a long haul RPG, and from the looks of his loser fans, supposed to be their favorites too. I can see why Spoony panicked after this and started to push himself for two more sessions of 'work' after this. Not enough to even begin to cover all the new Skyrim mods for sale.]
  
  Cuckson Sightings: Whenever Sheriff Cuckson is away, shattering arms somewhere in the name of law and order, all the people that annoy Spoony come out of the woodwork.
  
  Fortunately, he comes back in after a half hour. If you've been missing your fix him lately, you get you fill of him here--he grabs control of this stream by the reigns and doesn't let go!
  • He suggests you ought to stick around to watch it, too.
    After all, he is 6 foot six, and gets looked at like he's goddamn Godzilla. Don't make him mad.
  • He soon rantbrags about how you can't even *find* a gun in Cucknadia, and then demands chat keep spoilers out of all of this, people. "Spoony's been actually spoil free this far in, so let's let him enjoy it." When Spoony says it's alright, Cuckson later asks how many he would like customized for his playthrough experience going forward.
  • Later, he gets more desperate to be of assistance: "As always Spoony you cancall on me to be your Actual Support if you like, calling out weaknesses." (Where oh where would Noah Antwiler be without gentle Cuckson's guiding hand?)
  • Also, if he could have anything from Persona in real life, it would be "the ability to sleep easier at night any time," and he personally gives "high marks for weebing."
    Finally, you'll all be pleased to hear that he still enjoy making "you might say" observational pun 'jokes.'

Quotes and Other Items of Note
[Best snippets, in chronological time order.]

• Noah appears with a fat flushed face. I guess he's doing this fresh off his recent bender.

• Spoony admits he is actually streaming from his basement, where his consoles are, and not in his "office" with his PC upstairs this time. (I can't decide which part of that sentence is the most hilarious.)
  He's also using some kind of Yeti microphone (which looks like a large dildo).

• Spoony sarcastically comments that Arizona doesn't have basements to keep from sasquatches, and that he has played this game but not very much. So though he hates starting over and how slow the tutorials are…he's going to anyway.

• Spoony then rants for a solid minute on the PS4 controllers and how bad their thumbsticks are. Chat praises his thumbs and all parts of him in general.
  Noah puts on his "dorky" headphones (he went with them because they were cheap green). And we finally start.

• Spoony polls and chat decides to have Jap language off to here Spoony riff. He is surprised, figures they were "big-time on Japanese language."

• A bunch of DLC is apparently already unlocked. Spoony swears he didn't pay for any of them, especially the swimsuits, merciless difficulty, car stickers, and maid and butler costumes (hmmm….April….?)

• $20.00 from big donor 'Zamrock,' right on cue--"you have the absolute worst timing ever. I'm about to start DND and you're playing Persona 5? We'll definitely have to check this one out later. Good to see you again Sooon." (Love how this guy just stopped in to drop $20 like a real big shot)

• 9:40. As Spoony makes dated Mr. Anderson references, chatman 'akram haydari' mericelssly compares Spoony to DSP. "Payreton goals for productions were met but not delivered…both had friends turn backs on you ...phil went east to west, you went west to eats in 2014... both are assholes who steal from friends and are patholgical liars." Hilariously compares genetalia in mm. Spoony just goes "wow...that guy was weird." Isn't banned.

• Spoony responds to chat saying a lot of his Reb Brown reviews are gone for copyright flags and "there's really nothing I can do about that. I'm trying, though."
  (Spoony also no longer drinks diet…just regular Coke now. So much for the "healthy" soda switch of 2015.)

• 20:15. Guy in chat ('Johnny Zee') demands to know why Noah denies ex-gays and ex-trans exist and why he "supports self-mutilations instead of self-acceptance." Another Juan but not forgotten pops up.
  (As example of the rest of the cuck chat: 'Allard'--"Why is this Joker guy dressed like my Sonic Forces character?")

• 'D20asmr' tells Spoony he puts a copyright strike on his channel to have atlus take in down if it goes past two hours. Spoony responds with a smart-aleck response saying he "researched" how long it will be before they cut off his videos, and you didn't expect me answering you this time did you, and "I actually know what I'm doing, bastards."
  (Later he apologizes for if asmr was trying to help, thus giving him the finger in reverse and sticking his own balls with it.)

• Johnny Zee keeps laying the truth bombs on gender fluidity is a lie. Noah thinks he needs to report someone for hate speech but can't because he "couldn't figure out the method to find it." Since Noah forgot how to just ban people, Zee keeps going.

• Spoony says he missing his mods (where the hell is Cuckson??? Isn't it his job to be here?) so now 'Geo Soccer' will be taking care of him.

• Spoony says he "doesn't have time to moderate and play the thing." Then he snaps and starts making fun of Heil Hitler people as seven year olds and how he'll have to turn chat off because he doesn't have time to moderate" for 130 hours. You can listen to this beautiful rant here.

• Like the mighty Thor, Spoony regains his memories on how to properly ban whence picking up the Mighty BANHAMMER once more. (He had just been removing messages instead, albeit doing a poor job of that).

• 'Wolf Ragen' makes another $2.81 donation, begging to be a mod for Spoony.
  Seconds later, 'fox noney' also gives "money for mods." (Another new low level of pathetic). King Spoony graciously accepts but doffs them away, telling them you cannot bribe for mods. "Well," he muses, "everyone's but a price… But no …that's not how we're doing it."

• $2.00 quote from 'Dimitri Konobeev'--"Hope you're doing well." Spoony says that's a complicated question…he's trying not to complain overmuch,…but things have not been great. (Usual BS.)

• $2.00 quote from 'Thomas Tschirn'--"hey spooonard, you finishing this on stream?" (Spoony doesn't know if he has 200 hours in him).

• At 38:35, Sheriff Cuckson appears to Re-establish Law and Order.
  When asked how it's going, he says he's been "doing his time, so to speak." (Someone must've set up our hero upstate on a bad rap. For a 5 move murder he didn't commit).

• $10.00 quote from 'Balthaza228'--"Would you ever consider doing a playthrough or a vid on Monkey Island 2?" (Spoony says it's a strange choice, but it's a thought, and he doesn't think he has it anymore. Again, usual BS.)

• 'Zandrock' gives $10 to confess his love for sempai, and how he's been watching since 9th grade.

• Spoony says the Jersey wearing teacher looks like his older brother, whom none of the rest of us have ever seen.
  It's not Miles, although Spoony says Miles is doing fine.

• At an hour in, so far Spoony is not thrilled with the game. "All I'm getting is that people fucking hate me." He despairs that he's not even through the tutorials. Cuckson tells him to wait it out and it will get better and that "soon enough we'll get through it all."

• Spoony is starting to not have fun and slouch in his chair, which chat complains they can't hear. Spoony says he needs to slouch because his back is starting to hurt.
  Cuckson lovingly reminds him he's still in tutorial. "You won't find much, and you'll be back." (Spoony Experiment Official Motto™)

• $21.00 quote from 'notyoursaviour78'--"I've never donated to the Spoony before, though I bought Merch."

• $5.00 quote from 'NoGuffGames'--"Thanks for putting a smile on my face for so many years. You've always been someone that I could relate to, rants and all."

• $10.00 quote from 'Not Another Reviewer'--"If the Cat's not played by Danny John Jules, I'm not interested." (Spoony just stars ahead, grinning like an idiot).

• At just under the two hour mark, Cuckson makes sure his precious Spoony is holding up OK. He doesn't get an answer.

• Despite wanting to be his Guide to the Life Universe and Everything, Cuckson demands others in chat not give away spoilers. "Let Spoony experience everything in the game as much as possible." (Spoony's enjoyment apparently consists of jokes about honey and joining the volleyball team).

• 2:08:56. Sexy Noah pose.

• Spoony starts to approach his tiredness limit, around when Cuckson predicts it. So of course he keeps going for another 20 minutes.
  Cuckson tells him to "grit your teeth, we're gonna get trhough it man…Push through it with a story, if you feel one."

• It's not enough for brave Noah, though. Even though the gameplay is finally starting, He takes off the headphones and rubs his eyes, feeling burnt out after all that solid labor.
  Cuckson tries to soothe him by saying he's right at where he can pick it up. "Transformers is always an option."

• Spoony begins his tranditional complaining rant, muses what order to play in.
  Cuckson: "You are suggested to play zero first." (Damn he comes off like a pompous prick)

• Spoony lets his overwhelming need for begging dollars spirit let him continue, and puts the 'phones back on.

• $2.00 from 'NoGuffGames'--"Heading out to karaoke. Any suggestions?" (There are none).

• At 2:32:34, Spoony says he needs to stop the stream so he can eat, because he's about to pass out. Chat falls all over themselves hoping to feed him. Spoony is sure the game is good but hates how long it is taking to get through the start.
  Someone gives him $5 for a burrito, which helps Spoony decide what to have for dinner.

• Almost too late, 'xstationo11' donates $5 trying to get Noah to check out Hyperdimension Neptunia.
  Spoony is already in leaving mode.

Whew..that was a lot. And we're not done yet.
Stay tuned for Parts 2 and 3, coming soon.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Neptunia sounds like the perfect game for Mr. "I don't even like good anime!"

He's making fuck all, his retard bang skyrim slut is making fuck all, he proclaimed months ago that he was losing the house AND EVERYTHING, and yet he's streaming games like the walls aren't closing in. He's getting money. I hope someone can get to the bottom of where this money is actually coming from. It's certainly not Spoony earning it. Some kind of wealthy tranny sugar daddy? His brother/parents taking pity on him? Government fraud? Bogus injury lawsuit?

All of Trump's Russia deals go through Noah. He's perfect because nobody would suspect him.

Either that or the mafia is burying bodies in his basement.

At the same time, the twitter withdrawal has forced boss to stream more, he's already streamed three times in a week! Clearly this is the glorious return to show you all nonbelievers that all the patreon donations were worth it.

I just hope he doesn't overexert himself. His health comes first, after all :3

[Guest]

Could he have packed away some savings from back when he was at his peak popularity that he's slowly draining? How much was he making then, I wonder?

If you actually believe that Sploony is still in posession of some of the dough he made back in the day when he scammed people you're delusional and/or retarded.

He likely didn't even save that much of the ~$5k at the end of the month cause Mrs. Creepy-Dolls and him wouldn't know what the words "being responsible with your money" mean if they were jacking off on their dumb fucking faces.

[Boogie's Panniculus]

Tony forgot to mention Spoony said he was || this close to moving to Japan to teach English right before his FF8 review started to get popular.

[Tony Schiavone]

I caught part of it but wasn't sure what he was referring to, so I left it out.

He didn't really discuss it, only saying that would've been a "huge mistake." I got the impression that he only briefly considered it a career option like a passing thought, not actually taking it seriously.

(Much like how he treats the rest of his life)

[Charlar]

Neptunia sounds like the perfect game for Mr. "I don't even like good anime!"

He's making fuck all, his retard bang skyrim slut is making fuck all, he proclaimed months ago that he was losing the house AND EVERYTHING, and yet he's streaming games like the walls aren't closing in. He's getting money. I hope someone can get to the bottom of where this money is actually coming from. It's certainly not Spoony earning it. Some kind of wealthy tranny sugar daddy? His brother/parents taking pity on him? Government fraud? Bogus injury lawsuit?

All of the Clinton family deals go through Noah. He's perfect because nobody would suspect him.

FTFY

[mad bum]

I see cuckson is back in full boss mode which makes these so much better, I also love how he always has to play armchair general with chat and order them to not spoil anything.

And really Hyperdimension Neptunia? Only trannies like those games because they want to look like those girls.

[Guest]

Neptunia used to only be followed by brilliant, big brained lolicons before the tranny boom happened.

[Cuckson]

and extramana loves HN games...