Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Talk about the life consuming, celibacy inducing hobby that is all the rage these days.
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Kugelfisch
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Kugelfisch » Sat Jun 25, 2022 2:14 pm

Wake me up when I can play holocaust in a real KZ.
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Le Redditeur
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Le Redditeur » Sat Jun 25, 2022 5:08 pm

That's impossible, the wooden doors at the gas chambers have sadly collapsed due to old age.

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Kugelfisch
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Kugelfisch » Sat Jun 25, 2022 7:01 pm

Le Redditeur wrote:
Sat Jun 25, 2022 5:08 pm
That's impossible, the wooden doors at the gas chambers have sadly collapsed due to old age.
That's too bad. But we could make the room actually airtight and do a scientific test to see if the proposed gassing could theoretically work.

We'll just substitute the Zyklon-B with Fentanyl for ironic purposes.
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Cannons bray, the mighty quake!
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mad bum
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by mad bum » Sat Jun 25, 2022 10:59 pm

>a bunch of journalists got to promote some shit no normal person can or will afford
Very cool.
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VoiceOfReasonPast
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Fri Jul 01, 2022 10:46 am

Autism attracts more autism. Sooner or later, an internet nobody will attract the exact kind of fans - and detractors - he deserves.
-Yours Truly

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Le Redditeur
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Le Redditeur » Fri Jul 01, 2022 11:41 am

I've heard a properly shived Magic card can one used to perform seamless abortions.

Also, is it really surprising to these cucks that a toy manufacturer isn't really excited about abortions?

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ebin namefag
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by ebin namefag » Fri Jul 01, 2022 2:41 pm

Kugelfisch wrote:
Sat Jun 25, 2022 2:14 pm
Wake me up when I can play holocaust in a real KZ.
I want to play Holocaust in NZ.
Le Redditeur wrote:
Fri Jul 01, 2022 11:41 am
Also, is it really surprising to these cucks that a toy manufacturer isn't really excited about abortions?
Its not too late to diversify and buy Bad Dragon.
rabidtictac wrote:
Sun Jul 03, 2022 7:49 am
The secret is to stop thinking.
rabidtictac wrote:
Sun Jul 03, 2022 7:49 am
I assume the big crossover here is autism.

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VoiceOfReasonPast
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Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Fri Jul 01, 2022 4:31 pm

Speaking of Holocaust, I think I've found a holy grail in Antifa game design
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Resist & Remember: Weimar - An Anti-Fascist RPG

A funny thing about Antifa RPGs is that they never try to hide what they are. They generally have "Anti-Fascist" in the title or at least the description, and they always include a variation of "... and you get to punch Nazis in the face" at least once in their sales pitch.
It's like some weird ass religious mantra. You get to punch Nazis in the face. Why even bother to include this? This is a tabletop RPG. The GM can literally materialize punchable Nazis into any game, just by saying so.

That little sperg out of the way, WTF is R&R? It's the Prologue to the Holocaust Simulator, with the players taking the roles of Jews to experience historical events from the Roarin' 20s all the way to the Kristallnacht, using some bastardized D&D fork because that totally sounds like the right system for this.
Though I've got to hand it to the writer. This is like one of the few Antifa RPGs with actual facists. Usually they just present you with incompetent idiots who are mainly facists because the book keeps insisting that they are.

A campaign of R&R is also structured in 5 acts, because this shit is railroady as fuck:

>Act I of R&R: Weimar takes place from September, 1930 to November, 1932, the last days of the Weimar Republic in Berlin.

It should be noted that the writer has some kind of boner for the Weimar Republic, probably because SocJus doctrine postulates that it was the short-lived Golden Age of all things queer that hailed the birth of gender-reassignment surgeries and was tragically cut short by some angry Austrian with a funny mustache.

>Act II takes place on the night of the Reichstag Fire, February 27th, 1933.

Not that the players can do much. This shit is so railroady that they can literally just stand and watch.

>Act III covers the Gleichschaltung--known as Nazification in the west--that took place between 1933 and 1935.

I imagine there's lots of "This facists says something incredibly anti-semitic" here. At least they won't hang you from a tree because you still have more acts to railroad through.

>Act IV takes place on Kritallnacht.

This really boils down to making a few rolls to see if you get killed on the spot or wake up in a concentration camp.

>(The setting of Act V is a surprise.)

This act has nothing to do with the previous acts because the players have to create new characters, specifically BLM and/or Antifa members during the Unite the Right rally in Charlottesville in 2017. The "winner" is the first to punch a Nazi in the face :roll:

Sadly the Kickstarter didn't make enough cash for the final two stretch goals, which were to include rules for Nazi zombies and fighting the good fight against Mussolini's regime. Sad.
Backers also appear to be getting a bit antsy because the promised print copies keep getting delayed. Supposedly DriveThruRPG keeps telling him that his file isn't properly set up for print-on-demand :roll:

And despite this looking like a historical RPG, the writer has for some reason decided to treat the characters from the Dreigroschenoper as real. Because the only thing that can make the rise of the Third Reich even more immersive is knowing that Mackie Fucking Messer is running around shanking people.
Well, at least this gives me an excuse to end this travesty on a high note:
Autism attracts more autism. Sooner or later, an internet nobody will attract the exact kind of fans - and detractors - he deserves.
-Yours Truly

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wulfenlord
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by wulfenlord » Fri Jul 01, 2022 7:21 pm

Polish neurodivergent fag who "self-identifies" as a jew
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The forced smile on the hostess's face tlls me that he is 2 hover-fingers too far in her personal space :3
And some faggots let him write for Shadowrun 5th Ed.

edit: lol, this guy is like a male Rachel in his incompetence. This sniffling excuse was made 9. Months. Ago.
Maddeningly, I have been unable to provide DTRPG with files that meet their requirements; since my last update, there has been a half dozen (at least) more rounds of edits, corrections (with the help of someone else that actually knows about PDF/X compliance that was willing to volunteer their time for free), and subsequent rejections citing new and/or different problems. This is extremely frustrating for me to say the least. Unfortunately, I need to survive under capitalism like everybody else and since I'm disabled (denied disability benefits) and unemployed my income isn't exactly flowing, so I'm less confident it's the case I have the funds to print and ship even if I can FINALLY get DTRPG to accept the files at this point. For this reason, I've let myself largely refocus my creative/productive energies on other endeavors which I earnestly hope when brought to fruition will provide the necessary capital to get the books printed and shipped.
Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nfah Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl muh'fugen bix nood

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VoiceOfReasonPast
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Fri Jul 01, 2022 7:51 pm

>I'm totes gonna come back to my promise once I've started a couple other grifts

:roll: :roll:
wulfenlord wrote:
Fri Jul 01, 2022 7:21 pm
And some faggots let him write for Shadowrun 5th Ed.
Is that any surprise? That entire edition was a colossal travesty where abysmal editing and barely-functional rules were just the tip of the iceberg. I'd be surprised if even a single sane person worked on it.

6th edition btw is even worse. They simplified everything to the point that armor and super-strength don't actually do anything, and a good chunk of the rules are just band-aids to prevent exploits created by the other rules.

(They basically tried to turn it into Fate, with the entire rules revolving around not-Fate-Points and when you are and are not allowed to gain/lose/spend them. Except they had no idea what they were doing and the entire system is literally rotting from the core.)
Autism attracts more autism. Sooner or later, an internet nobody will attract the exact kind of fans - and detractors - he deserves.
-Yours Truly

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