Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Talk about the life consuming, celibacy inducing hobby that is all the rage these days.
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wulfenlord
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by wulfenlord » Fri Oct 01, 2021 9:46 am

I really hope that it's just a money laundering scheme to get pity bucks from gullible idiots. Nevertheless I fear that the creators will end up being a diversity hire somewhere or other, and that their degeneracy will continue to mainstream entertainment. Somehow the coof made those Untermenschen flounder & flourish somehow, because in the whole of 2020 there were only a handful of projects reeking of pride representation:

Wickedness
Welcome to Wickedness, a fantasy RPG by M Veselak about the resilience and power of queer community. Wickedness is a peculiar tabletop game written for exactly three players and one tarot deck, with no dice and no GM. It uses a bespoke tarot-drawing system loosely inspired by Jay Dragon’s Sleepaway, Wickedness is already a complete game: it’s been fully written and extensively playtested. We’ve decided to bring it to Kickstarter so that your support can turn it into the best possible product it can be.
>gay orgy for 3 players
>no dice, no GM
>already funded, but still begging for money

There has to be a law against this.

FUTURES | A Transformative Storytelling Game

There definitely has to be a law against this. The nigger "developers" straight out say that "because of Kikestarter rules we are not allowed to collect for charity, but we ask for a 2000$ goal, and will donate exactly 2000$ to charity out of our own pocket *hint hint*".

Instead they claim that the collected money goes into developing and shipping the "Game". Now what is the game FUTURES about? Oh, it's a totally unique concept, where 2000 dollars are definitely needed. It's a "storytelling" "card" "game", and I can't stress the air quotes enough. But look for yourself (have strong liquor at the ready though):
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Futures helps you to tell your story of transformative worlds never before seen or talked about. You already have the courage, and Futures will help you to see.
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Futures is very simple to play.

You will shuffle and set the Story deck and Change deck in the middle of the table.

One person will flip over and reveal to everyone a Change card. That person is now called the Listener.

Change cards show something that has changed in our world today. Imagine that this change is universally true and accepted.

Each person, except for the Listener, will now draw a Story card, which they will look at and keep secret from everyone else. These people are now called Storytellers.

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Storytellers now have one to two minutes to create a story. Their story comes from, describes, or tells what life is like in the future world on their secret Story card. The story bases itself in the Change card. How did this Change create this future world? What is it like to live in this future world with this Change?

Stories can be spoken, written, drawn, acted, sung – whatever way works for you to express and share the future world you are imagining. Stories can be as specific or broad as you want, about yourself or others or entire societies, and do not have to have a beginning, middle, or end. Stories can be creative, real, thought-provoking, inspiring, subversive, funny, absurd, and more. Ideally, stories give a sense of what the future world you imagine might be like with the Change card and Story card you have in front of you.

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One by one, starting on the left of the Listener, the Storytellers have about 30 seconds to share their story with the Listener and other Storytellers. The Storyteller can reveal their Story card at any time.

After listening to all the stories, the Listener will put the Change card in front of one of the Storytellers. The Listener can choose based on their own criteria, or the group can decide a specific criteria before playing. Criteria could include how creative, real, thought-provoking, inspiring, subversive, humourous, absurd (and more) the story was.
What a load of... Who in their right minds come up with shit like this? Imagine being so coked out of your mind you "develop" BLM/FFF/Antifa/climate hoax/pandemic hoax - the Game, where the Game consists of:
- draw a card
- assume what is printed on the card is real
- believe what is printed on said card
- draw next card
- discuss how you enjoy your mindwashing session
- everybody loses who actually plays the game

Axon Punk: Expanded - Hip Hop Infused Cyberpunk ttRPG
Expanded Tabletop RPG combining hip hop and cyberpunk. Players improvise, collaborate, and build a community in the megacities of 2085.
read:
stolen, bland, storyteller RPG combining nog culture (no culture) and what we think is cyberpunk based on the game & Blade Runner. Pillage, plead dindunuffin and join an anarcho commune in the St. Floyd slums of not-2077
Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nfah Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl muh'fugen bix nood

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VoiceOfReasonPast
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Fri Oct 01, 2021 10:34 am

wulfenlord wrote:
Fri Oct 01, 2021 9:46 am
I really hope that it's just a money laundering scheme to get pity bucks from gullible idiots. Nevertheless I fear that the creators will end up being a diversity hire somewhere or other, and that their degeneracy will continue to mainstream entertainment.
I think that's pretty much the idea here. They pull this shit to artificially enrich their résumé (which so far probably only consists of "Gender Studies Degree"), while at the same time appeasing their ego because they're now "RPG writers" and "game designers".
>gay orgy for 3 players
>no dice, no GM
>already funded, but still begging for money

There has to be a law against this.
Actually, it was already written, not already funded. Ideally RPG writers start these Kickstarters with at least the first draft of the text already done. Otherwise you get shit like the Mekton Zero disaster where the writer (the same yokel who gave us Cyberpunk, who would've guessed) was still half-heartedly writing the book years after the Kickstarter finished, until he finally grew bored and gave up to concentrate on either the Cyberpunk vidja, the new edition of the Cyberpunk RPG or the licensed RPG for The Witcher (whichever happened first).
The cash from the Kickstarter ideally goes into financing the art and the first batch of pyhsical copies and other doodads you want to send to your paypigs, with more cash meaning more art and doodas and maybe promises of additional books (though that can generate drama afterwards if those don't materialize).
What proper RPG Kickstarters certainly don't do is have every other stretch goal be "We pay ourselves more money".

Not that this all matters. A 3-person card game that's not Skat is already doomed to failure. Diceless RPGs are always more of a novelty than anything else, and a hard-coded number of players probably doesn't help, either.
Though I appreciate that the thumbnail on their Kickstarter example-of-play stream video shows a dead ringer for Chris-chan.
What a load of... Who in their right minds come up with shit like this? Imagine being so coked out of your mind you "develop" BLM/FFF/Antifa/climate hoax/pandemic hoax - the Game, where the Game consists of:
- draw a card
- assume what is printed on the card is real
- believe what is printed on said card
- draw next card
- discuss how you enjoy your mindwashing session
- everybody loses who actually plays the game
So if the "Listener" draws "The Police Receive No Founding" and I as a "Storyteller" draw "Collapse", will I get cancelled from the group because I have to tell that defunding the police was a bad idea? And why do none of the story cards look like they're from the same game?
This is just some retarded collaborative story game, except there are already much better versions around like story dice, which are just regular dice with (apolitical) icons which you roll and then try to make sense out of.
stolen, bland, storyteller RPG combining nog culture (no culture) and what we think is cyberpunk based on the game & Blade Runner. Pillage, plead dindunuffin and join an anarcho commune in the St. Floyd slums of not-2077
Ah, cyberpunk. Because that genre is not already oversaturated.
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Le Redditeur
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Le Redditeur » Fri Oct 01, 2021 12:05 pm

Diceless RPG is gay and wrong, as demonstrated by the utter faggotry of Castle Falkenstein.

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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Fri Oct 01, 2021 3:57 pm

At least there's still hope out there:
The Blerd ["Black Nerd"] Crusade (canceled in less than a week due to "valid critique")
>Black/Asian nonbinary "aroace" landwhale creator
>Give us money, we're an all-black podcast group
set in a homebrewed version of the Forgotten Realms
Talk about effort here. Afaik a typical D&D podcast generally goes for a completely homebrew setting, unless they're playing some module that's set in a specific setting (or a system like Legend of the Five Ring that's built around a specific setting). It's generally more interesting for the listeners and players (especially the Forgotten Realms have been done to death), and you avoid a friendly call from Daddy Hasbro if you try to sell merch like, say, a campaign guide.
Do you love Dungeons and Dragons but hate the racial stereotypes the game material [sic] perpetuates?
I'm getting mixed messages here, especially since only one player has a Drow (which Current Year doctrine tells me are racist representations of black people), and even then he's just a Half-Drow (not sure if that other half is also black or not). Ya gotta problem with pure Drow?
Do you wish there were more Black characters to cosplay?
Is there anything sadder than someone cosplaying as a character from a podcast?

A shame Kickstarter's search filter won't let you find all failed/cancelled projects. I stumbled upon this on accident.
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Guest » Fri Oct 01, 2021 5:28 pm

wulfenlord wrote:
Fri Oct 01, 2021 9:46 am
I really hope that it's just a money laundering scheme to get pity bucks from gullible idiots.
It's a Kickstarter so yes that's exactly what it is.

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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Sat Oct 02, 2021 11:59 am

So Wizards is apparently working on an "update" to 5e (let's call it 5.5), to be released in 2024 for D&D's 50th anniversary. Supposedly it'll be backwards compatible to the 5.0 stuff, but they may have just said that out of fear that nobody will buy new books in the next 2 years.
I assume they will replace "race" with "ancestry" or something equally less problematic (surprised they were still using that term anyways, probably because of muh tradition), and make their new way of handling racial Attribute modifiers part of the core book*.
Oh, and they'll probably erase the names of the OSR yokels from the core book that have since become too alt-right.

*) The new paradigm consists of just giving you a free Attribute bonuses which you can put wherever, because apparently giving elves +2 DEX and dwarves +2 CON is racial typecasting :roll:
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Kugelfisch » Sat Oct 02, 2021 9:23 pm

Is DSA pozzed as well?
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by wulfenlord » Sun Oct 03, 2021 5:58 am

Not yet, Ulisses does have some trannies though, but as far as I remember they were only pushing the horrible Ctulhu spinoff, where they explicitly said that it's not canon, and the "Wege der Vereinigungen" aka "The aventurian guide to Sex" (as its the compendium of the literal Sex goddess Rahja) does state some "love is love" slogans, but still in-game the Hearth-goddess Peraine is not blessing same-sex marriages, so I guess all's well?

edit: I see with glee that some faggots actually left the publisher Ulisses Spiele because "Wege der Vereinigungen" wasn't diverse enough for them :3
Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nfah Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl muh'fugen bix nood

Whenever you feel down :3
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Sun Oct 03, 2021 7:58 am

Of course, mate. Same-sex relationships may have been outright stated or merely hinted at for the longest time (the sex goddess' temples are literally brothels, she also has male priests, and her order of knights looks and sounds like the most homo order of knights you could find), but Peraine is still the goddess of traditional families, which I assume makes her the most hated diety aside from Praios in Current Year.
Deep DSA LoreShow
Praios is the leader of the setting's primary pantheon (which effectively 98% of all playable cultures worship in some form or another, even if all you pray to is a single demi-god). He is the sun god, as well as the god of truth, justice and the Aventurian way. He also hates magic, which is why his church also runs the obligatory inquisition, who don't exactly like magic-users that are not licensed guild magicians (who are literally required by law to dress up like an obvious wizard).
The church of Praios is basically the closest equivalent to the Catholic Church (if the Catcholic Church had outsourced stuff like marriages and funerals to other churches), and many lazy writers and players have projected their hatred of the (medieval) Catholic Church onto the church of Praios.

Of course, the problem with mingling historical atrocities and fantasy fiction is that witch burning becomes a lot more justifiable if magic is real and witches can indeed learn all the wonderful hexes and curses that IRL witches have been accused of.
The "not diverse enough" probably comes from a lack of transshit. Who knew that a historical fantasy setting where sexism never really existed (unless you're an orc) and homos are at least tolerated could end up looking bigoted :roll: ?
If they'd done their research, they would've known that the only feminine penis ever depicted in the history of DSA belongs to Rahja's demonic counterpart (which is effectively Slaanesh with an even stronger focus on rape).

And why dafuq would trannies write Cthulhushit? Seems like they have a lot more dysphorias than just the gender kind.
Autism attracts more autism. Sooner or later, an internet nobody will attract the exact kind of fans - and detractors - he deserves.
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by wulfenlord » Sun Oct 03, 2021 8:13 am

FuNnIlY enough, when you follow the libtard blog breadcrumbs from the post about faggots leaving the Dark Eye publisher, you get to some batshit crazy rambling sooner or later (literally projecting antisemitism into the game). The eternal jew victimhood knows no bounds, or rather, mental illness begets mental illness.
Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nfah Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl muh'fugen bix nood

Whenever you feel down :3
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