Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Talk about the life consuming, celibacy inducing hobby that is all the rage these days.
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VoiceOfReasonPast
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Tue Apr 18, 2023 4:15 pm

You know, it's funny you never hear about the Racist Ranger in any of those "The Problem with D&D" articles, even though 5th edition still has shit like this:
Favored Enemy aka Hate Crime as a Class Feature wrote:Choose a type of favored enemy: aberrations,
beasts, celestials, constructs, dragons, elementals,
fey, fiends, giants, monstrosities, oozes, plants, or
undead. Alternatively, you can select two races of
humanoid (such as gnolls and orcs) as favored
enemies
.
You can learn to hunt such wonderful humanoids such as orcs (aka black people), goblins (aka probably jews?), trolls (aka definitely jews) or gnolls (aka also black people? Hyenas are from Africa, right?).
This is stronger in 3.X since you can pick two humanoids, but also weaker since the attack and damage bonuses are now a capstone ability you get at level fucking 20 (Favored Enemy itself just makes it easier to track your hated foes down).
When you gain this feature, you also learn one
language of your choice that is spoken by your
favored enemies, if they speak one at all.
"Welcome to Trump's Right-Wing Death Squad. Now please sign up for the mandatory Ebonics course."
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Complicity
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Complicity » Wed Apr 19, 2023 4:52 pm

VoiceOfReasonPast wrote:
Tue Apr 18, 2023 4:15 pm
gnolls (aka also black people? Hyenas are from Africa, right?).
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Wed Apr 19, 2023 8:05 pm

Wait a sec... the term "gnoll" comes from the originally being a cross between goblin and troll.
They're Black Hebrews.
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Kugelfisch
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Kugelfisch » Thu Apr 20, 2023 7:40 pm

They do like chucking spears and have a large schnauze. :thinking:
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Mon Apr 24, 2023 6:56 am

The 5th edition of Werewolf the Apocalypse is out. No idea if it's the actual 5th edition. It's just a weird gimmick they apply to this whole revival of the Old World of Darkness (even Hunter the Reckoning has a "5th edition" even though oWoD Hunter only ever had one, 'cause no one gave a toss until NuWoD made Hunters interesting). Maybe they want to fool people that these are related to D&D (which they aren't).
It's pretty much what you'd expect from these "5th editions":
  • the writing staff is full of edgelords, wokeists and degenerates, be they former fans elevated to writer status, or OG writers who are now even more batshit than ever before
  • Like it is so common in this revival, the monsters give less of a shit about taboos because fuck you dad, you're not telling me what to do
  • Also fuck you dad, you're not telling me who to fuck (hot werewolf-on-werewolf action used to be peak haram in older editions, since the offsprings are invariable messed-up and weird)
  • OG Werewolf was basically about hulking murder machines protecting the world in a losing battle against cosmic horrors, with occasionally veered into Captain Planet territory, because their arch enemies love using MegaCorps as a proxy.
    Now since all of these 5e games are thinly-veiled wokesters vs right-wingers analogue, they've doubled down on the Captain Planet part. Because the real threat to reality is Trump.
  • At least they kept the terrible World of Darkness prose. Expect plenty of paragraphs about how Mother Gaia is howling out in pain and the injustice and destruction brought upon by Man or some shit.
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Thu Apr 27, 2023 7:05 am

>be Youtuber
>order Magic the Cuckening cards
>accidentially get sent boosters for the upcoming set that is to be released in May
>do an unboxing video anyways
>hear a knock at the door
>find out WotC hired the fucking Pinkertons to get their top-secret cardboard back

WTF :lol:
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Kugelfisch
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Kugelfisch » Thu Apr 27, 2023 7:11 am

Any parcel sent and delivered to you is your property. I would've told them to fuck off and ask WotC what the fuck they were thinking.
They aren't stolen goods so they can kick rocks.
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Thu Apr 27, 2023 8:44 am

And if they didn't bring any goons of color with them he'd be free to stand his ground and gun them down if he was living in the proper state.
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by wulfenlord » Thu Apr 27, 2023 9:17 am

Kugelfisch wrote:
Thu Apr 27, 2023 7:11 am
Any parcel sent and delivered to you is your property. I would've told them to fuck off and ask WotC what the fuck they were thinking.
They aren't stolen goods so they can kick rocks.
I hate to be that guy, but ackshurely it's not your property. It's a grey area if you are required to make the other party aware of their mistake, and under no obligation have to pay return shipping, but its not free stuff lulz
Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nfah Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl muh'fugen bix nood

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Kugelfisch
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Kugelfisch » Thu Apr 27, 2023 9:55 am

It's not free stuff, it's you ordering a product and getting a slightly different product. That stuff is 100% yours.
For the audacity of sending fucking goons, I'd have them pay dearly and make a huge PR mess. The video would also not have been taken down, since no NDA of any kind was signed. Them not wanting their unreleased cards shown is nothing but a wish without a NDA.

And yes, it is your property. It was the retailer's property at sale, became the parcel delivery company's property during transport and your property at the successful delivery.

They would have to fight that in court and in this case would stand a very low chance of success, since the only exception to that is if they can prove substantial financial damages.
That's simply not the case here. Magic cards were ordered, Magic cards were delivered of equal retail value.
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Cannons bray, the mighty quake!
Centuries of blood becomes erased!
I am the white ghost!

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