Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Talk about the life consuming, celibacy inducing hobby that is all the rage these days.
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Kugelfisch
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Kugelfisch » Sat Jul 23, 2022 1:04 am

What a goofy monster. Looks like something from Spore.
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Psalm 137:9

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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Sat Jul 23, 2022 6:02 am

They're the pets / attack dogs of the Mind Flayers, those Lovecraft-looking squid faces. It's funny 'cause Mind Flayers like to eat brains.
Their gimmick is that they can shrink down and crawl into your skull to take you over.
They're more independent in Pathfinder, since Mind Flayers are one of those critters not part of the OGL (like Beholders), and Paizo was too lazy to go the typical retro-clone route of just renaming them, so they had various other critters take over the role of Mind Flayers as evil, non-human masterminds (mostly Intellect Devourers and Aboleth*).

*) three-eyed asshole fish who are old as shit and love to enslave people by making them unable to breathe air so they have to work in their little underwater kingdoms.
Though who knows if they are still allowed to be always evil slavers in Current Year.

EDIT: So that druid chick from the D&D trailer who can wildshape into an owlbear is apparently a Tiefling. Because she has tiny little horns you probably won't even realize are there most of the time.
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Note that actual Tieflings have spent the last two editions having a tail, much larger horns that start at the forehead and non-human skin tones and eyes.
I guess they figured she was already exotic enough by virtue of being a ginger in a Current Year movie production.
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5e Tiefling waifuShow
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(She admittedly looks closer to what Tieflings can look like in 2e and 3e where they were more subtle and varied in appearance, but why base Tieflings on those older editions which WotC keeps insisting are "problematic"? They probably just wanted to save some cash.)

I guess a movie version of a Dragonborn (aka dragondudes because lizardmen are apparently too lame) would just have funky-looking eyebrows.
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Le Redditeur
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Le Redditeur » Sat Jul 23, 2022 3:57 pm

She is a blue eyes, red haired semen demon, though. That's very rare in a Current Year production.

I don't know what are you complaining about, Voice, since those horns could easily be confused to catgirl's ears. Clearly the superior aesthetic choice was made.

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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Sat Jul 23, 2022 4:36 pm

Live-action catgirls aren't hard to spot, mate.
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by wulfenlord » Wed Jul 27, 2022 6:27 pm

TransScammer of July
Hieronymus
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In Hieronymus, you play a group of refugees fleeing an astral terror known only as the Follower. As it pursues you, you rip your way through reality into strange worldscapes inspired by the paintings of the mediaeval artist Hieronymus Bosch, the Follower only a few steps behind.
"Wait, that doesn't sound so bad", I hear you say. Yeah well for a game that already exists, uses free art assets, and features a retarded medieval slenderman plot with rules like these:
A simple dice mechanic to resolve situations where the outcome is uncertain - players simply roll a pool of six sided dice to figure out if they succeed or fail, take stress when they fail, and indulge their sins when the stress becomes too much.
Also, my hunch was, as always, correct, this Laurie Oconnell is a marxist troon faggot:
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Alchemistresses
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Tranny Not-Sailor Senshi. That's about it. Oh, and the creatress drops "queer" right next to "fat" in it's bio.
Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nfah Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl muh'fugen bix nood

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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Wed Jul 27, 2022 6:49 pm

Why would you make a Current Year game featuring Bosch paintings? That shit is way to Christian and white. I guess the "original" art will be more diverse :roll:

And I've pretty much given up on ever seeing a true-and-honest magical girl tabletop RPG (not counting that old Sailor Moon one that is just Big Eyes, Small Mouth based on the inferior US dub). At first, all we got was grimdark misery porn ripping off Madoka Magica and pretty much nothing else (including at least two different flavors of Princess: The Hopeful in case you want to combine the autism that is a Madoka clone with the autism that is World of Dorkness), and now all we get is this tumblrshit where all the girls are fat, black and/or actually dudes.

>muh feefees

Less whinin', moar asskickin'.
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Kugelfisch
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by Kugelfisch » Wed Jul 27, 2022 7:34 pm

Indulge in sins, huh? Imagine being so fucked that you look at Bosh's insane depiction of Hell and get a boner.
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Wed Jul 27, 2022 7:51 pm

Of course they love sins. They've named an entire lifestyle and the month celebrating that lifestyle after the personal favorite sin of Lucifer himself.
Autism attracts more autism. Sooner or later, an internet nobody will attract the exact kind of fans - and detractors - he deserves.
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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by wulfenlord » Wed Jul 27, 2022 8:07 pm

And why wouldn't you be proud of getting your ass fucked pretending you're a girl? What are you, a homophone or something?
Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nfah Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl muh'fugen bix nood

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Re: Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Sun Jul 31, 2022 10:05 am

Cucktaku has some... hot takes on the D&D movie. And by "hot" I mean "weird world salad".
>whining that the movie is copying Marvelshit (which does sell) instead of exclusively pandering to the queer agenda (which doesn't actually sell)
>whining about overreliance on special effects when D&D is high fantasy and literally has "dragon" in the title
>questioning why you would even want to make a movie about the most popular tabletop RPG of all time
>claiming there already is a "perfect" D&D movie in the form of LotR (even though LotR belongs to the huge chunk of fantasy literature that doesn't actually fit into the D&D corset)
>claiming D&D is basically LotR just because Gygax ripped off Hobbits, Ents and Balrogs, completely ignoring that the magic system and overall power level aren't anywhere close to compatible
>claiming D&D rips off LotR the same way Tomb Raider is just a gender-bent Indiana Jones
>rejoicing that the D&D "hobby" is pandering to queerfags like everything else these days
>basically whining that the movie is an action flick instead of being more like Thirsty Sword Lesbians


Also apparently the movie is co-written by a literal Goldstein.
Autism attracts more autism. Sooner or later, an internet nobody will attract the exact kind of fans - and detractors - he deserves.
-Yours Truly

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