Basements & Beards- Analogue Gaming Thread

[wulfenlord]

They really love filling libraries with this shit.

Of course, it's their main means of indoctrination, including writing children's books about the joy of anal sex and finding your true self by self-mutilation.

[Kugelfisch]

Pretty funny to make a statement after years that it turned out to be kinda difficult to make a game in your game making project.

Like being late on your album because you realised playing instruments is difficult.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Should've just gone with PbtA.
Speaking of...

Why We Fight - Direct Action: More Crunch

I'm not gonna go into detail on boring shit, so lets get on with the boring and the cringe.

Traveling for Fun and Profit

So I guess the main point of waltzing through various scenes before reaching your actual mission objective is to get more Personality Discoveries for your characters, which can be cashed in for Advantages so you don't end up dying.

Discuss your discovery, explain how it affects your character.
This is your opportunity to get to know your characters in a deeper way, and play out how they
react to their surroundings and reveal their Personality Discoveries.

So Spoony might spot a tree with a broken branch and reminisce about his old home.

Dunno about you, but this is kinda sad considering the focus on solo play.

Locations

So there are six different types of locations, each with 6 example details/descriptions so you can roll shit up on a d6. Let's see if I can find the most cringe for each location:

Suburbia

Local park transformed into community farm, which shares excess produce with visitors.

I've seen how this shit looks. There is no excess produce.

Tame animals roam the streets in harmony after the town expands its local animal rescue

I assume most of them end up dead due to debris, trash and not-so tame animals.

Combined rooftop solar & veggie farm offers “body & battery recharge station”

Well I guess you have to relax for the multiple hours it'll take to recharge anything.

Motorway

Repurposed freight trucks hang from a flyover, connected by bridges to create a small settlement

That sounds like a great way to get killed.

Car engines repurposed to replenish local power networks

That doesn't sound very sustainable.

Service station becomes swap-shop tradenetwork, connecting communities together

I think these communities should move over to where rivers are. Transporting shit via land becomes a lot less efficient once you run out of fuel.

Farmland

Abandoned farm has transformed into a thriving ecosystem after years of rewilding

How long into the post-apocalypse are we? Also I imagine that an abandoned farm won't stay abandoned for long

Farmer runs jailbreak shop for modern tractors to break their DRM and make them repairable

What kind of cyberpunk dystopia did you guys live in before whatever the fuck happened happened?

Geodesic domes creating environments for all manner of once-imported foods

Take that, Fair Trade!
And don't you mean greenhouses?

City

A museum uses its ancient weapons to protect those under threat

I'm sure the fascist milita with its assault rifles will be mighty impressed by your bec de corbins.

Multicultural hub teaches cultural exchange, collecting knowledge from all backgrounds

Maybe you guys should learn more about survival and shit.

New bridges criss-cross from rooftops, turning cramped blocks into open air vistas

Sounds like another great way to get killed.

Wilderness

Former golf course rewilded into a nature reserve, little flags all that remain of its past

You couldn't even be arsed to remove the flags?

A new branch of a river has extended into a stunning waterfall, with flourishing wildlife

The fuck happened here? An earthquake?

A natural hot-spring! Both animals and people have learnt to share the space and relax

Then another COVID happened.

Village

Wartime beacons now used by villages to signal each other in the night, and light the way for night time travellers

Sounds like a great way to attract militia.

Exclusive marina transformed into beautiful regenerative aquaculture paradise

Take that, rich people!

Cow-pulled caravans roam the countryside, broadcasting folk songs on local radio

Another great way to attract militia.

Oh, and one more:

Companionship cafe blossomed into settlement who make sure nobody goes without friends

Now we're talking!

Damage

Taking one "hit" doesn't really do anything.
Take another hit and you're dead. Yikes.

Whoever is at the top of your Crew List is more vulnerable than the others!

Let's put PUR and Marzgurl at the top, then.

What’s more, if a character with three or more Personality discoveries dies, the others in their Crew each receive the Hardship “Grieving those they took” until they return to the hub.

Everyone is sad when an important character dies

Character Advancement

So after a successful mission you pick two characters who then form a bond, gaining a +1 if they help each other out. This maxes out at +2.

You can then either at a +1 to a character's Specialty, or upgrade that character's bow.
(You probably want to prioritize the bow, as it makes that character twice as useful in combat.)

Missions

So WTF does the game expect you to actually do?

Kettling. Toll Roads. Immigration. The powerful have lways sought to restrict the movement of those they disdain. Now this crucial crossing is barricaded by the White Fist with makeshift defenses and lethal weapons. By restricting access to anyone else without large payments of supplies, they’re separating families, preventing trade, and killing anyone who questions their authority. It won’t be easy, but it’s time to end this chokehold on people’s freedom.

“...And although these times are hard, know that the rotectorates always have their gates open for those willing to prove they deserve better…”
-Guiding Hand Broadcast

Their signal triangulated by the smart folks back at the hub, you can see the antennas long before you reach them. It’s from here that the Guiding Hand reaches out to those suffering from raids and sabotage, offering them sanctuary from the perils of the lawless lands.

The fiends!

Not everyone is able to fight, which is why it’s all the more important that those who can, do so to protect the vulnerable. Helping people reach safety is no easy task, however, and large groups can make easy prey for opportunistic aggressors.

The world sounded a lot safer in those fancy location descriptions.

This mission can also be used for transporting captured enemies back to the Hub.

That's where the "Hostile Civilians" come into place.

There's also "Intercept a Weapons Convoy", "Assault a Fuel Depot" and "VIP Takedown", but they're not detailed in this preview.

Missions & Situations

Aka more shit that can happen on your way to the mission:

The gunshots of White Fist snipers ring loud as you approach, and as you draw close, you spot civilians trying to shelter away from vulnerable positions.

Whether they’re being hunted for their colour, creed or just being in the wrong place at the wrong time, it’s clear no mercy will be granted. If we don’t do something, who will?

I think they're just Koreans protecting their store.

The shouts and sounds of destruction cover your approach, but it doesn’t prepare you for the shocking scene these White Fist looters have left in their wake. The bodies of those who dwelled here litter the floor, shattered doors and windows marking their trail of destruction.

It’s too late to save those that were here, but the soldiers are loading the supplies and belongings into an idling truck. The damage may be done, but if they get away with this, they’ll only go on to attack others.

Friendly reminder that white people are evil.

There was a copse of forest here, once, a vital wildlife corridor that provided habitats and shelter for animalkind, and relief from city living for people. Now you find it devastated, whole swathes of the towering trunks reduced to mere stumps, the acrid smell of burnt detritus choking the air. Pushing through, you find the White Fist logging operation. If you stop it now, this place might have the chance to recover.

Heaven forbid anyone does anything with the lush forests sprouting up everywhere.

The sounds of combat are loud as you approach, but it’s quickly clear how one-sided it is. While the White Fist usually gain workers through propaganda and coercion, the more dangerous and life-threatening work sees them turn to force and kidnapping.

The caravan these refugees were traveling in lies in disarray, but worse still, the White Fist are restraining and forcing those they can catch into the back of jeeps. If we don’t stop them, who knows what awful fate awaits them.

Fear not, powerless minorities. Your queer saviors are here!

You come across a collection of Civilians that live in the area you’re passing through. While not unfriendly, they don’t want any trouble, including the type that comes with helping those who have enemies. Despite this, they have a number of issues, and perhaps helping out would make them realise that you fight for everyone, not just your own.

"You will like us, wether you want to or not!"

You find what seems to be some kind of hospital, hastily cobbled together to try to help the survivors of a recent attack. Most of the patients are too sick or wounded to be moved, and what few doctors there are seem out of their depth. You can see they have a few issues you might be able to help with, though!

I'm sure you can do something with those patients. Just how sustainable do you think Soylent Green is?

Next time I'm trying to make sense of the combat rules.

[wulfenlord]

Time for a mental illness reel for Into the Nogger Lands.

First interesting tidbit is the cast bloat from the initial project of 6 (with the crowdfunding page being the only remaining space where Gabe Hicks is to be found, putting the remaining OG devs at 5?!) to around 15-25 (hard to track down what each person is actually doing though, since they all write their CV with whatever scholar & astronaut bullshit they want).

The Sinister SixShow

So from the start we have:

• Cruella DePass - creator/director

No need to get into her further

• BJ Walters - lead dev

I found no immediate sign of gay niggardry, but he is a proud well-poisoner for more black characters at IDW & Marvel comics

• Jasmine "ThatBronzeThot" Bullar - dev (allegedly)

Girl you are dangerously pale for a POCShow

• Vanessa "DangerouslyTwstd" B. - lead artist or artistic director, description not clear on the site

Twisted she/they faggot indeedShow

• Eugenio Vargas - writer

also not that black, could be the lighting though - pronouns in bio, not openly a gay fag, but roots in theatre and plays the Pony RPG...

Leaving us with the wildcard Gabe James #CancelMeToo Hicks - turns out my hunch about him being too promiscuous in his polycule was dead on, this baaaawing whore even admits being polyam in her brave defamation video:
https://www.tiktok.com/@cam.inator/vide ... 7933573422

His socials are mostly nuked now, except from his self-written BGG:
https://boardgamegeek.com/boardgamedesi ... gabe-hicks

Should have choked the bitch instead of hiding, since he clearly is a narcissist otherwise, but I guess he had to few marginalization-points left to defend himself after dumping his stats in CH.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Is he just a Tieflingfag, or the one responsible for all the furry art?

[wulfenlord]

I guess the main furry culprit would be the one who came up with the hyena and elephant race, dunno which one. From the looks of it, he seems to be a cosplayer only and dangerously straight, which is why they managed to cancel him.

[wulfenlord]

Multicultural hub teaches cultural exchange, collecting knowledge from all backgrounds

Maybe you guys should learn more about survival and shit.

Hey now, those african mud huts will provide the perfect curvature for the Wakandan Magitek solar panels.

Combined rooftop solar & veggie farm offers “body & battery recharge station

Charging up your cell phone will just require payment of manning the glory hole for 4 hours.

[wulfenlord]

Welcome to Ongo Bongo Lands - Into the Cast Bloat

I wasn't kidding when I said they started to employ useless grifters for their utopian space colony. I'm looking forward to the cancellation of the print run and further delay of the core book PDF. I'll just highlight the openly neuroqueer cast:

• ShaNiqua ShacQuise - alleged position: "contributor"

• Will "Black Weeaboo" Niggins - alleged position: cover art

• Leoni - alleged position: "Streamer" & "Consultant"

• Nestor "TheGenericNerd" Z. Hack - alleged position: Podcaster

Looking like a gayer version of Benzaie is no small feat

SpoilerShow

• Brian Gay - alleged position: being gay writer

• Allie Bastion - alleged position: developer

Just look at her and you can fill out her bio for her.

SpoilerShow

• Kasady Walker - alleged position: developer

Imagine the previous specimen, but 200% mentally ill.

SpoilerShow

• Aaron Radney - alleged position: map illustrator

Achievement unlocked: Pedo smirkShow

• Aloy Los Santos - alleged position: game mechanics

rubbing of hands intensifiesShow

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

It's weird that Nestor looks like Benzaie but has stolen his last name from Apollo Z. Hack.

And why is the guy even here? Weren't there any black podcasters?

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Why We Fight - Direct Action: Mortal Kombat

So unlike PbtA this game does have some semblance of a combat system, but it's still weird af thanks to being PbtA (aka another case of "Just play Savage Worlds").

So everyone involved in a fight has a Fight Rating. Roll a 2d6, add the combined Fight Rating of your guys, subtract the one from the enemy, and check the result in typical PbtA fashion.
It's kinda like a mutant abortion of Tunnels & Trolls, or various mass combat quick resolution mechanics found in a number of other RPGs.

Also bear in mind this is all abstracted, with no actual tactical map or anything. It's like trying to replicate a cover-based shooter using your default Dragon Quest JRPG combat system.

The typical enemy Fight Rank is 1 for the "Hostile Civilian", 2 for your average fascist milita goon, and goes up to 4 for shit like a flamer or grenadier.
The anarchists interestingly enough start at 1, and get have up to an amazing 2 if they have a gun or an upgraded bow. Guns can have some nice bonus effects, but the bows makes it easier to stay hidden, which effectively lets you delay having complications really start to suck ass.

Now of course the initial setup needs the be pretty balanced, since a 2d6 bell curve doesn't leave much room for varience before shit turns into a one-sided curb-stomp, if not to say a death spiral. If your crew rolls pretty darn well on its first two rolls, it's as good as over. If you roll badly you have to jump through all sorts of hoops to even the odds (like the "Scattered" debuff that lets you gang up on a single bad guy, effectively guaranteeing that you kill the shit out of him) - but not only can these attempts also create complications, but it also increases the length of the combat by a good chunk.
You see, only "takedown" actions (aka the big Fight Rank dice-off) can take out an enemy soldier - and only one at a time, unless you have the benefit of an effect like "Clustered".

Now thankfully even during a takedown you aren't actually fighting every enemy soldier at once. You target a specific type of enemy - but there's also a minimum Fight Rank equal to the number of different enemy types on the field, because fuck you.
I guess this incentivise you to target the stronger enemies first (as reducing the the minimum Fight Rank is likely to affect the weaker enemy types first), but it's a bit obtuse

I'm beginning to understand why semi-narrative games like Lancer just switch over to some kind of D&D combat system when it's time to fight.

But hey, there seems to be some kind of innovation here: The enemies can actually act. After every 5th action from your characters they can trigger one of their abilities. This is about the most I've ever seen a PbtA game actually treating NPCs like they exist

EDIT: I'm pretty sure the pro move here is to spend your first two after-mission-advancements to upgrade one guy's bow twice. This gives you a crossbow that lets you treat the enemy as "Scattered" once per combat for free.

Next: Think I might lighten the mood with a superior 2d6 system before descending into the joyless, pretentious cavern that is Girl by Troonlight.