Dead Horse Interchange

The animal kingdom keeps striking back at Chantal. This time she got bitten by her new cat because she thought it was a good idea to wake it up and keep harassing it.


Her biorhythm is completely fucked. She wakes up at around 10 PM, no doubt in preparation for Ramadan (she has always counted sleeping as a form of "fasting").

She has also let loose that she might possibly go back to Canada to take care of her (mental) health. Makes sense due to the free health care, but the waiting times involved will probably cause her to lose interest as soon as they don't give her a magical pill that fixes everything.
She might also just be border hopping again to reset her visa.
Either way she will primarily use this trip to feast upon all the Cucknadian junk food she can't get in Kuwait.

VoiceOfReasonPast wrote: ↑

Tue Mar 12, 2024 12:00 pm

She has also let loose that she might possibly go back to Canada to take care of her (mental) health. Makes sense due to the free health care, but the waiting times involved

It doesn't take that long to throw a MAID pamphlet at her.

Just give her the McDonald's gold card one could win in the app a while ago. Free BigMacs for a year. Not as fast but just as effective and funnier than euthanasia.

That she would chose a religion and live in a nation that actually enforces fasting may be the most delicious irony there is.
It's dumber than me converting to Judaism. Setting yourself up to fail right from the start.

Don't worry. Nobody will bother her when she sleeps all day alone in her apartment and only awakens at night (when it's okay to binge). And if push comes to shove she can just come up with an excuse to spend most of Ramadan in Canada (where the Nashville Chicken Sandwiches await her)

Kugelfisch wrote: ↑

Wed Mar 13, 2024 7:14 pm

Just give her the McDonald's gold card one could win in the app a while ago. Free BigMacs for a year. Not as fast but just as effective and funnier than euthanasia.

There better be some fine print about how much you are allowed to eat per month, 'cause she will hit that limit in a matter of days.

I mean yeah, my whole point is that she isn't even the very least bit religious but can't even pretend to follow Ramadan like she could in Canada.
Her being awake only after sundown like a fucking vampire is embarrassingly obvious.

If I remember correctly, you were limited to fifty BigMacs a month. A threshold that even Movieblob wouldn't manage to hit.

Fool. MovieBlob can't even begin to compare once Chantal unleashes her full power level.


(I would've liked to only post an image, but for the life of my I can't find this thumbnail as its own image.)

That there are people that earnestly have their eyes roll into the back of their heads as a genuine reaction - to anything - is just absurd to observe. That's some cartoon shit.

But few do it as unsettling as her uwu

VoiceOfReasonPast wrote: ↑

Wed Mar 13, 2024 9:23 pm

But few do it as unsettling as her uwu

Because it's over absolute bottom rung goyslop. Not over an intense orgasm, not over winning a million bucks, not over heroine, not even over actual delicacies.
It's over crap pigs wouldn't even touch.

A sub 2€ pack of Shin Ramyun is more flavourful and interesting than those barely over microwave-tier shit burgers.
Forget the MikkeyD gold card. Serve her a freshly, home-made Oklahoma onion burger and her head will explode Scanners-style.

False alarm regarding Chantal, everyone. Her musings about potentially going back to Canada have just been a silent threat towards her fake husband, who has become more active off-screen as a result.
Still, both her birthday and her tourist visa running out are in the near future, so who knows if she won't change her mind anyways.

Despite continuing claims he totally lives with her in this apartment, she is now spending almost every waking moment sitting in his former gaming chair (much like how she spent most of her time in her former Cucknadian apartment sitting on some office chair in the kitchen). She has also set it up so low she's usually just peaking over the table with her fat head and arms, which really doesn't help with her giant toddler looks.

Her sleep schedule also doesn't quite line up with the "No Eating" time windows for Ramadan. I guess this is mostly so she can traditionally break her non-existent fast with dates and water as part of her Muslim LARP.
When it's still day her chat can also troll her really easily 'cause her fucked-up brain will look for even the faintest excuse to think about food and get hungry.
And throughout all of this holiest of months, she's still just doing mukbangs and whining about her detractors.

She also managed to acquire the coveted YT Silver Play Button. How legit this is (seeing how quickly she got it after hitting 100k subscribers) is anyone's guess, but apparently this made her euphoric enough to upload terrible rap songs and Madonna covers.

She's also getting really pissed at detractors calling her a fake/bad Muslim, what with her food obsession during Ramadan, not actually knowing anything about the Quran or her faith (does she even know of her "husband" is a Sunni or a Shiite?), or recording herself praying in the wrong direction.
This triggered her into some weird rant about how everyone is allowed to practice their faith however they want (except that's not what Islam is about, honey), and calling her detractors "Islam Police" (apparently not knowing that's an actual thing, though I think "Sharia Police" is the more common term).
She should be glad that she's only ever interacting with her fake husband. If the wrong people hear about this heresy she can probably expect some good paddlin'.