Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

[ebin namefag]

Who said they ever had sex?

Diabetes and high blood pressure may have rendered their genitals inoperable but I'm sure they still did some disgusting stuff.

Their piss tastes like birthday cake.

[Le Redditeur]

Do I need to unearth GitGud's post imagining how the sex goes in the Lovehaug's bedroom?

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Sugar daddy is a bad idea considering how much those people are prone to betus.

If you're as plus-sized as Harambe, the beetus is just a natural part of human life.

What other reason would he have to marry a gorilla? I’m pretty sure he’s incapable of actual love..

Didn't the whole relationship start because she made the first move? I bet marriage was her idea as well, and he figured it was just about his only chance of tying the knot.

As for what he got out of the deal, it certainly makes him look more enlightened as opposed to marrying a white chick. Plus I'm sure she can appreciate his love for the chicken tendies.
And I guess it's a safety measure for whenever someone might call him racist. I mean, there hasn't been a lot of black guest actors in his epic storyline...

[Kama]

Yeah, she took him to McDonald Convention or something like that….. I’d say you could do better than McDonald’s, but I guess a fat gorilla would know what else to eat. Much less wouldn’t know where to take a date.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

What do you do at such a convention? Hunt down old merch of Mayor McCheese? Be educated about the rise and fall of the ball pits? Wait in line to try out the new Szechuan Sauce formula?

[RedLine]

Two great big fat people having their first date at a McDonald's Convention? It's like poetry.

[Kama]

What do you do at such a convention? Hunt down old merch of Mayor McCheese? Be educated about the rise and fall of the ball pits? Wait in line to try out the new Szechuan Sauce formula?

Probably but no, I meant that she took him to a McDonald’s while he was at some comic convention or something probably for one of his panels. So basically the gorilla did the equivalent of a Star Wars nerd going up to Mark Hamill and asking him him out for a big Mac.

Ugh now I want the McDonald’s convention to be real real. That would’ve been a better story.

[Musical Space Cowboy]

Do I need to unearth GitGud's post imagining how the sex goes in the Lovehaug's bedroom?

The one where Harambe is a commandant, Linky's ass is the showers, and puppets are Jews?

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

There's seems to be a quite a market for people collecting old McDonald's playground equipment, so some kind of convention could work out.

Also leave it to our beloved professional comic book reviewer extraordinaire to break the main rule of convention appearances: Never get too intimiate with your fans. There's a good chance you will regret it.

The one where Harambe is a commandant, Linky's ass is the showers, and puppets are Jews?

A true classic among classics. I have never reread a piece of fiction that often.

[Kugelfisch]

Diabetes and high blood pressure may have rendered their genitals inoperable but I'm sure they still did some disgusting stuff.

I'd consider two such specimen being in the same room to be vile enough but I'm sure some facesitting did occur as well.

I fully believe that Linkara's self-loathing over being a faggot and his intense autism made him just go along with what she wanted because he thinks he's supposed to.
Let's not forget that aside from dead muppet stuff he also favourited "boy dominated by mommy" shit.