Pat the NES Cunt

Whine and Bitch about people long after they become interesting to talk about
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VoiceOfReasonPast
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Mon Nov 01, 2021 2:33 pm

Finally the perfect console for fishing simulators.
Autism attracts more autism. Sooner or later, an internet nobody will attract the exact kind of fans - and detractors - he deserves.
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Le Redditeur
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Le Redditeur » Mon Nov 01, 2021 3:35 pm

VoiceOfReasonPast wrote:
Mon Nov 01, 2021 2:33 pm
Finally the perfect console for fishing simulators.
Too bad no Breath of Fire 3 or 4 ports.

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Mon Nov 01, 2021 5:36 pm

Some Sick Fuck wrote:
Mon Nov 01, 2021 2:28 pm
Made by Panic. That's accurate name, and I would also like to add that "panic" in my language means virgin. Looks like absolute shit. Who wouldn't want something that looks like the first gameboy merged with those tiger electronics shitty handhelds?
As if that wasn't enough, the actual designer of the console and the one who came up with the crank idea is called Teenage Engineering. You couldn't come up with a more "grooming victim" name if you tried.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teenage_Engineering

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Kugelfisch
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Kugelfisch » Mon Nov 01, 2021 6:59 pm

A subsidiary of Diddle Design.
Some Sick Fuck wrote:
Mon Nov 01, 2021 2:32 pm
I've added it to my previous post, but the crank... is part of the controls!
That's absurd.
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Mon Nov 01, 2021 7:54 pm

11k views in the first day. That's some Lupa numbers.

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BobbyBoucher
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by BobbyBoucher » Mon Nov 01, 2021 8:09 pm

The coof hasn't killed me yet. I decided to play Witcher 3. I've never been so disappointed in my life.

Update for episodes 255 to 267. Running a fifteen or more episodes behind.

In that time, Pat's apparently gone full lugenpresse on the Amico, which has delayed again, but that's to be expected given the global trade disruption which is getting worse.

Screenwave Media also bought out RetrowareTV so that site is active again.
  • Pat apparently needed to upload the Video Game Years to his own YouTube account.
  • However, he didn't remove the segments with accused rapist JewWario.

Pat's wrong round up:
  • Nintendo announced the Switch OLED. Pat and Ian promoted the "Switch Pro" just like all the other YouTube fags and it doesn't exist.
  • Blizzard is dying from sexual harassment problems. This company is supposed to revive Diablo.
  • Pat called the Capitol Hill Riot the "worst day since 9/11". Then the Fall of Kabul happened.
  • Pat praised a bunch of countries for having better covid responses than the US. Most of them are now having major outbreaks.
  • Pat's claimed game development is harder than movie shoots. Alec Baldwin murders someone on set.

ian updates:
  • ep 265, He's done with root canal.
    • But now he has gaps in his teeth.
    • Looking at implants that cost $1k and then more for the procedure.
    • Ian wants to chew properly.
  • Ian finally quits Luna.
    • It's apparently some online writing job.
  • Since about 2015, Ian was only working part-time at Luna.
    • He had health problems in 2017.
    • He also complained about not having health insurance.
      • Apparently it was too expensive for him, when he voluntarily worked part-time...

Amico drama never ends:
SpoilerShow
  • ep 255, Amico Subreddit taken over by Intellivision.
    • "Now it's totally censored and taken over as a marketing arm."
    • "When reputable sites get a hold of the Amico, you'll be in a world of hurt."
  • ep 261, a new sub-reddit for anti-amico people was set up.
    • Tommy apparently did a q&a there.
    • Pat complains about "slander," "personal attacks," and a "smear campaign" against himself.
  • ep 257, Amico demonstration at National Video Game Museum.
    • "No masks, just a bunch of sloppy assholes all not wearing masks," says Ian.
    • "We're four months away from almost everyone getting vaccinated."
    • Ian says "If you're tired of our spicy takes about wearing masks, fuck off."
    • Pat says "We haven't talked about politics since the Insurrection."
      • "Masks are not a political issue. It's a public health/safety issue."
      • "If you think it has anything to do with politics, it has more to do with your world view than ours."
      • "Climate change or anything else has nothing to do with politics."
      • (Some people who attended said they only took masks off for pictures/demonstrations.)
    • 35:05 Pat says "YouTubers that attacked us personally were there."
      • "I will not say their names because they're asshole people."
    • Pat speculates this is all to milk investors on Republic. (It reached $11.8 million.)
    • Pat with crocodile tears says he feels bad for the customers who is going to get a shit product.
  • ep 258, Analog Pocket Delayed to October, just like the Amico.
    • (They sound very defensive, not wanting people to use it against them.)
    • Pat says "it's not a first timer doing this."
    • (Pocket delayed a second time to December. Almost like there's a global production slowdown.)
  • ep 260, PiePacker Kickstarter.
    • TLDR They promote this as an Amico competitor.
    • It's Stadia with a ROM dumper and emulators.
    • The dumper stops working when the service shuts down
    • Pat says people don't want to hassle with emulators.
  • ep 261, Evercade VS console
    • TLDR They promote this as an Amico competitor.
    • Pat says these are real games and not mobile quality trash.
    • Pat says it's a pre-existing product from a company that makes real products.
    • Ian says "If you need couch co-op that doesn't do online, you can pay $250 for one that might be coming out."
      • "Or you can be $100 for this one."
      • (Or use any computer with an emulator.)
    • Claim there is no board change, so no dev cost. (There was a board modification to add USB ports.)
    • (The dumbest part here is Tommy signed a deal with Evercade in February to put old Intellivision games on it.)
  • (Later in July, there was an Amico event at a Crayola center or something.)
    • A lot of people saw and tried the Amico.
    • They seemed to like it and had fun.

contrivirus:
SpoilerShow
  • ep 256, Pat dismisses claims of blood clots.
    • Says it's coincidence if someone had a heart attack after getting vaccinated.
    • (Reminder: Pat heard about a woman who had a stroke and then caught the coof. Pat blamed the coof for the hospitalization.)
    • (Several countries have limited the use of Moderna due to side effects.)
    • (UK, Ireland, and Iceland have breakthrough cases despite high vax rate.)
  • ep 258, at end of podcast, Pat says half the people aren't wearing masks in Newport.
    • Ian hates Newport.
    • Pat: "Half of them are the hippies we can't stand."
      • "The people that don't give a shit about you."
      • "Fake hippies in college."
    • Ian: "Racist, greedy, fucking awful dirty shitty, racist."
    • Pat: "Unempathetic behavior."
    • "Sorry to make it political at the end, talking about masks."
  • ep 266, pat goes to a backyard party
    • Unvaxxed woman there. Said she wanted to see how it plays out.
    • Pat wonders if she meant it causes people to drop dead. Quotes Alex Jones.
      • Ian says "that's not how they work".
      • (Maybe she's pregnant Pat? They seem to cause miscarriages or death 2-3 days after birth.)
    • Pat says there will be a booster, but not a version 1.1 for this vaccine. (Which vaccine? There are six of them.)
      • Says we'll be lucky to get 70-80% vaccinated.
  • Related, 8-bit Eric (GameChasers lackey) had the coof, wasn't jabbed.
    • Colin Powell got it and died, though, despite the jab.
  • Pat pops up in a Boogie2988 video. (4:30 in)
    • He's not wearing a mask in the video or any picture I've seen.
    • This was probably Retropalooze in Texas. Same state as that Amico event Pat lost his mind over.
    • (Texas didn't have a mask mandate during the Amico event, so fuck Pat even now.)
    • (Pat's city of San Diego recommends masks indoors even if vaccinated.)

n64 guidebook:
SpoilerShow
  • AVGN shilled Pat's book in the Fear and Loathing episode.
    • Pat says it's one of James' best episodes.
    • James later did a Carmageddon 64 episode. (Pat probably wrote it/captured footage from an emulator.)
  • Pat gives writing advice about his guidebook:
    • "don't reference other games" (Ebert referenced other movies in reviews.)
    • "read a lot to become a better writer" (Pat's admitted he doesn't read.)
    • (His guidebook reviews read like summaries. No serious criticism at all.)
  • ep 264, a voicemail actually asked why Pat isn't using flashcarts for his guidebooks.
    • Pat's excuse is "muh screenshots".
    • He would need to give 20 flashcarts to his writers and capture devices.
    • "You need a computer and software to do it."
      • (Composite capture USB devices are $13 on Amazon.)
      • (Emulators need computers anyway.)
        • Pat's claimed you need a high-end computer for N64 emulation.
        • Do his writers have gaming rigs?
      • (OBS is free. Any computer in the last 7-8 years can do this.)
    • "If it was one person or two, yes, but it's untenable for a project of this size."
      • (20 collectors could easily own the entire N64 library on cartridge.)
        • Problem is, Pat's writers aren't N64 collectors. Neither is Pat.
        • They should still own the carts even if they use emulators for screenshots.
    • "Screenshots for 95% of the games, you won't be able to tell the difference."
    • "We're using the closest look to the N64 hardware."
    • "I thought about this more than you, sir. Trust me."
  • ep 265, guidebook is 70% written. Will be finished by end of year, but not released.
    • Other people have said him they want to do their own books.
      • Pat says "It tears at your soul in order to finish."
      • "This much writing and this much depth."
  • Pat's father was very dismissive of his other guidebooks.
    • Didn't know what to do with the ones Pat gave him.
  • A bunch of people apparently asked for a GameCube book.
    • Pat was disturbed by it.
    • (Proof Pat doesn't understand the retro/nostalgia market.)
  • ep 267, Cucknadian shipping killed Pat on a recent wholesale book deal.
    • Says he lost thousands of dollars of "potential money".
    • Then corrects and just says money.
    • Shipping costs apparently tripled.
    • (He probably didn't lose money. He just didn't make as much as he expected.)

other shit:
SpoilerShow
  • ep 256, Frank apparently grows weed.
  • ep 256, DLSS for Super Switch
    • "Switching from Tegra chip to Nvidia." (Nvidia makes Tegra.)
    • Will have DLSS support.
      • Pat says "This is big news if it works."
      • "If you can somehow keep the power you need on your system lower than what the actual output looks like, you can do a lot more."
      • "That's incredible."
    • Pat says "You'll be getting closer to getting your Cyberpunk-type games because the game will be running it a lot lower resolution."
  • Wired says independent game store are here to stay.
    • Ian's worked at a game store for close to 14 years.
    • Ian says most independent game stores have seen large profit over pandemic.
    • Ian tweeted that 2020 was their best year despite being closed for two months.
    • People came into Luna, come with a list of choices and leave with last one.
    • (Luna ebegged to pay employees instead of using Paycheck Protection Program.)
  • ep 259, Pat says no one watched his Pac-Man Punk video from last year. (28k views)
    • (His YouTube account is a mess. It's flooded with podcast segments.)
      • His Punk 2020 Christmas vid was awful, just talking about games he received.
      • Standard bitching and moaning.
  • ep 260, People went after them over Pac-Man 99. (TLDR they hated it.)
    • Pat says this person is a loser.
    • Ian say "People whose entire self-image is built up by being good at video games."
    • Pat says it's the arcade people. Says they are bigger douchebags than normal.
  • ep 263, Pat thinks Game Builder Garage for Switch will be a hit. (Seems to have bombed.)
  • ep 263, Both Pat and Ian want a better train system in the US to be like Europe/Japan.
    • (The US has one of the best freight rail systems in the world.)
  • ep 264, Ebay bans adult games
    • Pat says "We're a backwards society. We glorify violence, obviously."
    • Ian says American values are extremely puritanical and fucked.
    • (These two made fun of some weeb hentai game fans.)
  • ep 264, GameCenter CX delcares PS2-era retro.
    • Pat complains, saying aesthetics should determine "retro" status.
    • (TLDR he thinks only 2D and bad PS1 3D can be retro.)
  • ep 265, Skyward Sword Amiibo controversy
    • TLDR They bitch about buying a toy for "quality of life improvements."
    • (NFC chips can be cloned using a cell phone and blank tags.)
  • ep 265, Jim Sterling on Millennials killings nostalgia.
    • TLDR They complain about people buying products to flip.
      • (They're hypocrites. Pat has made a fortune from his game collecting.)
        • Ian's profited as well. He's got rare items.
        • Game Chasers made money buying for cheap and reselling.
    • Pat says they will gamble on crypto or NFTs.
    • Pat says Boomers stripped mine what the Greatest Generation did.
      • So now Millennials are struggling.
      • (No mention of Free Trade or mass immigration. Pat prints his books in China. Ian's wife's family are probably a bunch of illegals.)
  • ep 267, Ian bought an Oculus Quest using earnings from selling AMC stock he bought in December.
    • (Complain about Millennials gambling above, does exact same thing.)
  • ep 266, GameStop NFTs
    • Pat's one share of GameStop stock apparently cost over $250.
    • He was planning to sell at that price and take "a small loss". (The stock jumped up around here.)
  • ep 267 q&a will arcades ever come back?
    • TLDR They say yes because of barcades.
    • Pat again says he almost invested in a barcade that would've opened last year.
      • (Probably Jay from Game Chasers)
      • Also says he's been approached by others.
    • Pat says barcades have brought back preservation. (???)
  • ep 267, Billy Mitchell threaten to sue Karl Jobst.
    • Pat and Ian brush it off.
    • "Speaking of old men that should go away," says Pat.
    • Karl Jobst set up legal defense fund.
    • Pat says it's a scare tactic. (Turns out it wasn't, the lawsuit is proceeding. Billy seems serious in his video.]

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Musical Space Cowboy
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Musical Space Cowboy » Mon Nov 01, 2021 9:32 pm

Guest wrote:
Mon Nov 01, 2021 2:28 pm
As if that wasn't enough, the actual designer of the console and the one who came up with the crank idea is called Teenage Engineering. You couldn't come up with a more "grooming victim" name if you tried.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teenage_Engineering
I've heard of Teenage Engineering only because of their work with synthesizers, plus some pocket-sized samplers that look unfinished (and also having LCD screens with useless crap on them).

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Mon Nov 01, 2021 10:03 pm

That recap was infuriating. I can't wait for the vaxxed to figure out that they destroyed their immune systems. Look at the mysterious "super colds" circulating Europe. They did it to themselves.

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Some Sick Fuck
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Some Sick Fuck » Mon Nov 01, 2021 10:48 pm

BobbyBoucher wrote:
Mon Nov 01, 2021 8:09 pm
The coof hasn't killed me yet. I decided to play Witcher 3. I've never been so disappointed in my life.
Too many white characters in that game? You should play some Skyrim to cleanse your palate, that's a quality game, not like that CD Project trash!
Guest wrote:
Mon Nov 01, 2021 10:03 pm
I can't wait for the vaxxed to figure out that they destroyed their immune systems.
Humanity has finally reached the long awaited cleansing due to faulty vaccines... millions are dying in europe, while americhads are just improving their immune system by naturally receiving the coof as the blessing that it is. Have you been donating to metocuck lately?
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Mon Nov 01, 2021 11:03 pm

Guest wrote:
Mon Nov 01, 2021 10:03 pm
I can't wait for the vaxxed to figure out that they destroyed their immune systems.
I think Pat's immune system was destroyed by something else...

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