The Angel Armor Saga by Lewis "The Lightbringer" Lovhaug

[wulfenlord]

Louis finished the makeshift grave for Rain by tying two sticks together to form a cross.

Did he have string, too? Otherwise it'd be more like an "X marks the spot"

He had gathered up whatever belongings of value that she owned and buried them with her in case someone came by

So? It doesn't do her any god now. Assuming poachers will refrain from graverobbing, in which case they'll find all the loot instead of maybe missing some of it :3

"I'm sorry I wasn't fast enough to save you."

You need to be better to get your isekai harem.

"Goodbye, Rain. I'll never forget you."

All those wonderful memories of the last 24 hours, noooo

Last thing I remember was two feet and a very nice voice...
Please, God, let me have wound up in a monastery for stripping Catgirls...

This guy will sexualize and objectivy every woman he meets, won't he?

it was the kiro that the Linkaran Man came.

"He would spout nonsense like I AM A MAN in the streets and was killed for being a bumbling hobo"

He wears an armor that has been imbued by angels, and he shall gain the power of angels himself.

Say, those angels sound pretty powerful, why don't you worship them instead of an underage smartass?

Three Dark Knights stood at the opposite wall, standing over the dead body of a girl. Louis gritted his teeth in anger from seeing the dead girl. She couldn't have been older than fifteen years old

"Stop killing my future waifus!"

"Fuck you!" Louis said before smiling.

See? It's important to smile at your enemies, it's the honorable thing to do. Just furthering the point that the Knights are the bad guys and your demented hobo cult are the good guys.

Indow followed behind Louis, still seeming a bit shaken by his shouting at her.

"Please let me at least be attractive to him and grant many litters with his virile seed"

Now, the language is in ancient Ai, but I've managed to translate most of

Clearly the venerable first church of all that is Horny has more than one translator at hand? No?

Priest Garik Chyprea of the First Church of the Linkara, my daughter Assistant Priestess Indow

So she's only a half-catgirl? I see the priest is a man of culture, nyan :3

busily tying an assortment of supplies to the side of his horse

So being the Linkara means knowing how to ride as well, I see.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Book 1, Chapter 6 - Another Fine Mess
(Or: Dirty Work)

So last time, we found out that...

• ... Linkara's power level is all over the place. His trusty Groin Kick is OP and without a known counter, but as soon as he's confronted with a numerically superior opposition, he just parries one blow and accepts death. I guess his extensive "TV" knowledge didn't include a lot of swashbuckling movies, or sword-centric action in general.
• ... the Linkaran faith makes no sense. It's entirely built around a prophecy which nobody actually knows in full because it was split into five piece and never copied, because they are paranoid about the wrong people reading it. And even the churches that do have a copy don't actually know the fully text of their piece because it's written in some older tongue.
  This is like if the Book of Mormon still only consisted of the golden plates that nobody is allowed to see.

You'd think an international meeting of the greatest minds of the Linkaran faith would help our hero discover his destiny. This is in fact exactly where Indow's dad is headed, but apparently he thought it'd be a better idea for Linkara to head out alone with Indow on a quest to visit the other churches in chronological order so he can read the prophecy pieces himself.
Note that the Linkara is the single most important character of the entire Linkaran faith, but this mofo of a head priest didn't think it'd be worth it to bring him to LinkaraCon.
He should've, though. Not just because of the religious significance, but because Linkara is now fucking dying.

The Fine MessShow

Indow rung out the washcloth she held in her hands, letting the waterfall back into the fast-moving stream that she had dipped the washcloth in a moment ago. She then quickly ran back over to Louis, who lied upon a pile of furs that Indow had arranged after she failed to rouse him from his unconscious state. Indow placed the washcloth onto his forehead, hoping to break the fever that had overcome him. She sighed, rubbing his shoulder sympathetically.

"I don't know how you've fallen ill, my lord, but I promise to keep you in good health." She stated, although knowing that he probably couldn't hear her, anyway.

Indow then looked down a little farther at him, wondering if she should remove any clothing of his to keep him cool. That's when she noticed it: several rashes appearing on his neck. She raised in eyebrow in curiosity, then gasped.

"No... It couldn't be!" She exclaimed.

"I'm lying on a rock."

Louis' remark had been completely unexpected. Indow jumped back a little in surprise, gasping as she held her chest to slow her heart's beating.

"My lord!" she exclaimed.

"Why am I lying on a rock?" Louis asked.

"Y-You collapsed... Fell off your horse... You have a high fever, my lord. And... And I fear you have the Silent Death..." Indow explained.

"Silent Death?" Louis rasped. "I remember... I remember talking to Rain about it..."

"It is a disease, my lord. Although the scientists and scholars call it 'Hathoj,' it is better widely known as the Silent Death. It wiped out a great many people in its time, over a thousand kiros ago. There have been several different strains of it popping up over that time, but the last reported case of it that I know of was five hundred kiros ago! How can you have it?!" Indow asked.

"It's actually quite understandable." Louis stated.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, the reason it hasn't appeared in over five hundred years is because people have developed natural immunities. Survival of the fittest is an actual fact in terms of genetics, because a strong immune system is going to be able to fight off diseases better than a weak one. Indow, this planet and the people on it, yourself included, have had over five hundred years to develop natural immunities to this Silent Death thing, the disease is still around but it's just that it doesn't affect the people in it. I've never encountered the disease before on my world. I've got immunities to chicken pox, smallpox, polio, and probably a couple more diseases I can't think of. It's only natural that I'd get inflicted with the Silent Death."

"My lord, you don't understand! It's called the Silent Death because it brings about death! Your fever and loss of energy is just how it starts. For some reason, the process has accelerated, and you've acquired the lesions on your neck and your voice is straining! If this continues, you could die in a matter of days!"

"Could we head back, go back to the Church?" Louis inquired.

"Unfortunately, my father and most of the church are heading to the conference in Kien where Linkaran priests and priestesses are gathering to discuss your return and the obligation of the church to help you in your quest to destroy the Darkness. But even if they weren't going, no one at the church is in the least bit qualified to treat the Silent Death!" Indow exclaimed.

"Well, then I'm open to suggestions on our next course of action, Indow." Louis stated.

"Well... There's no way we can reach Walsz now in the little time you have, much less your condition will make it hard for you to ride a horse. However, I have heard of several taverns and inns that could help us provided I could find one..." Indow replied.

"I'm assuming then that you'd leave me here?" Louis asked.

"I'm afraid I'll have to, my lord. There's no way I can carry you." Indow replied.

"Then go, Indow. I'll be fine." Louis replied.

Indow nodded, her face a mixture of worry and sadness. She quickly mounted her horse once more and galloped off, leaving a few of her supplies with Louis in case he recovered on his own.

*

Indow's breathing was becoming a little erratic as she continued riding along, pushing the horse to its fastest speed. She winced in pain as she was bouncing on the horse. She was never used to riding at such high speeds, or riding at all, for that matter. When she began practicing around with magic, she had to stay indoors and isolated in a room for about two years so that her body could adapt to the magic energy flowing within her. It had been a painful experience, but she understood why it had to happen. As a matter of fact, all sorcerers and sorceresses undergo the same process as they train.

Not anyone can just use magic. Untrained magic usually results in chaos and uncontrollable spells that spin out of the depths of the caster's imagination. And so, each person who joins the Mage Guild must undergo several years of training in magic use and control, and two years minimum of channeling the energies that allow someone to use magic. It doesn't require any special person with some sort of inner power, but it requires an incredible willpower and tolerance to pain.

The actual two-year process for channeling the energy is quite painful. The channeler must eat and drink less so that the magic energies can start to adapt to sustaining some of his or her physiology. Some have been known to emerge from it in a psychotic state because of the heavy amount of solitary confinement, as well. Some weaker-willed individuals have been killed when the lack of eating and drinking and/or taking in too much magical energy resulted in death.

As for Indow herself, she had only recently come out of her magical training, and although she wished to remain merely a Linkaran Priestess, she felt that the magic would assist her in the coming war with the Darkness. Frankly, she was shocked as it was that Dark Knights had begun to move in on Ai.

How can the savior of Sin die of Hathoj? By the Hand of Walsz, how can this happen?! Indow thought to herself.

And that's when she realized how much time had really past. She had been traveling with Louis for roughly half a day so far before he fell ill, and he was unconscious for another half-hour before she left to find some help. Half of the sun was already beyond sight on the far horizon, which meant nightfall was coming soon. She had been riding for hours but hadn't been paying attention to the road!

There could have been dozens of places I could've stopped, and I was too busy worrying to pay attention!

With her focus restored, Indow suddenly narrowed her eyes to peer up at what was ahead. Two torches were lit and were ten feet apart from one another. It was the standard location marker for a tavern.

"What luck! I just hope my luck shall continue, for my lord's sakes..."

As she came up to the tavern, she slowed the horse down, reading the sign that hung on a post. It said the tavern's name was the "Leaping Ghost Tavern & Inn." She stopped the horse near one of the posts and got off, proceeding then to tie the horse's reigns to the post. Indow ran over to the doorway of the tavern and pulled it open. Immediately, her senses were hit by several things at once. The first was the smell of alcohol and decay that permeated her quite acute sense of smell, and she winced and considered turning away for a moment to vomit from it. Next were the loud sounds of belching and belly laughter that rippled the air. The Tavern wasn't lit too brightly, but well enough for people to see other people from a distance.

Women carried drinks from table to table, wearing loose clothing meant for the lowest of peasants. Some were even being taken away by patrons of the bar into the back rooms for purposes even Indow frowned upon. Again, Indow felt the urge to turn away from the sordid tavern and try to find her luck somewhere else, but she shook her head and fought off the feelings of disgust she got from this place.

However, it didn't take her long to realize that priestesses of her age, of ANY age for that matter, didn't come here very often. Within three steps of entering the tavern, all eyes were upon her. People were confused, a little wary of seeing a young girl wrapped in Linkaran robes coming into such a place where alcohol, money, and sex ran rampant and were considered a part of everyday life. The tavern was no longer filled with laughter, yells of happiness or anger, or orders for drinks, but an uneasy silence. Indow looked around once and gulped, gathering up the courage to speak.

"My name is Indow Chyprea, Assistant Priestess of the First Church of the Linkara. I was traveling with a companion of mine towards Walsz when he fell ill with the Silent Death. His condition is worsening by the second, and for some reason he's moving through the different stages of the illness faster than normal. I ask only for assistance and a cure for the cursed plague."

She then stood there, looking confident and strong, but inside feeling weak and a little sick. The people within the tavern exchanged glances for a moment, unsure of what to do. Indow then waited another twenty seconds, and when no one said anything more, she turned around and began to walk out of the room.

"Manlus, Ethenor, ready the carriage! I need two volunteer warriors to provide escort!"

Indow quickly turned around, seeing that the person who had given the commands was the bartender behind the main counter. He was a well-built man with long blonde hair and a short beard, who also carried a staff with him. Two men near the counter moved quickly, exiting the tavern. Indow guessed that the two were the ones that the bartender had ordered to get the carriage. The bartender got out from behind the counter and approached Indow.

He whispered into her ear, "We'll discuss the issue of my repayment on the way to your friend."

*

"Is that acceptable payment?" Indow asked.

The bartender grinned. "Quite acceptable. I'll want payment after we've gotten your friend back to the tavern."

Indow nodded in response. She sat at the front of the carriage, next to the bartender. They were pushing the horses to their limit to reach Louis before his condition got too extreme to treat. Indow looked to her right, seeing one of the escorts the bartender had hired. He was a Dwarf with a thick black beard, and a double-bladed axe attached to the side of the horse's saddle. Indow found this quite odd, considering Dwarves rarely rode horses, although she had heard of some rare cases.

And to her left, Indow's second escort was a human warrior, adorned with white armor that glowed a little in the pale moonlight. His hair was long and blonde, and he smiled with courage and dignity as he rode atop the white horse. Indow wondered for a moment if this man was a member of the Linkara, for his mannerism and his general appearance seemed to make him look that way. She blushed slightly at some of the thoughts that ran through her head; thoughts not appropriate for a Linkaran Priestess.

"I think we're coming up on your friend!"

Indow shook herself out of her thoughts and returned her attention to the task at hand. She squinted a little to see ahead of the group, seeing a figure lying upon some animal skins. The darkness made it hard to make out the face, however.

"I believe it to be him! We must get closer!" Indow stated.

The bartender nodded and whipped with the reigns to get the horses moving. Indow squinted harder, trying to make absolutely certain that the person lying upon the ground was indeed Louis. However, she then noticed the two large creatures that stood over the person. She gasped as she realized they were both eight feet tall, and covered in a thick green skin. One carried a large cudgel, whereas the other had a spiked mace.

"Orcs!" Indow exclaimed.

Hearing Indow's voice, the two Orcs looked up and saw the group approach. They both growled and raised their weapons in preparation for a battle. The Warrior to Indow's left sped his horse up, getting closer by the moment to the lumbering soldiers. In an amazing display of acrobatics, the Warrior leapt off his horse, unsheathing his sword from the side, somersaulted through the air, and slammed his blade through the Orc's face, killing it instantly. The other Orc ignored the actions of the Warrior and roared loudly, running at the Dwarf with its mace raised. The Dwarf winced and immediately commanded his horse to stop, not being able to perform the same maneuver that the Warrior had accomplished.

Just as he got off the horse and got his axe, the Dwarf was kicked by the Orc away. The sheer difference in height gave the Orc an advantage in combat. However, the Dwarf wasn't a pushover. When it landed from the Orc's attack, it rolled for a moment, then jumped to his feet right afterwards. The Dwarf clenched his teeth, raising his axe up in a defensive stance. The Orc was momentarily busy with the Warrior, forcing its mace down against his sword. Indow winced and searched her pockets for any kind of magic dusts she could use against the Orc.

The Orc finally managed to hit the Warrior away, and very quickly used his mace to block the Dwarf's sudden strike down at him. The Dwarf growled silently, trying desperately hard to force the mace away from him. And then, the Orc roared in pain as the Warrior sliced his sword through its torso. The Orc then fell to the ground, a crumpled mass of flesh and green blood. With the Orcs slain, the Bartender and Indow leapt off of the carriage and ran to Louis. The lesions that had been there before had spread from his neck down to his chest and his lower face.

"Come, we must get him onto the carriage and back to the tavern! We have half a day at most!" the Bartender exclaimed.

"All right, put him in the bed. Gently!" The bartender instructed.

Two wenches from the bar slowly laid Louis down in the bed, having carried him from the carriage over to the back Inn of the Leaping Ghost. The Wenches then left, pushing past the assemblage of tavern patrons and Inn residents. Indow rubbed his arm sympathetically before turning away and walking towards the bartender and a healer who had been staying at the inn.

"Will he live?" Indow asked.

"It's difficult to say. I believe so, but his body is quite different than the men of this world. I do, however, fully trust that he shall make a complete recovery in a day or two." The Healer replied.

Indow let out a sigh of relief. "Thank the heavens! I was worried that-"

All of a sudden, an intense scream interrupted Indow. It had come from just behind the group, so the three turned and faced towards the bed, trying to see what had happened. It didn't take long for them to figure it out. A boy, no older than seventeen years, had just attempted to grab the gauntlet that was still attached to Louis' arm. The boy was adorned in light leather armor, a strap wrapped around his waist and expensive-looking boots on his feet. The leather gloves he wore, however, had been singed through, creating light burns on his hands. He winced in pain, biting his lip as he stood against a wall, cradling his burnt hands against his stomach.

"Lithmenar! You filthy toad!" The bartender yelled, walking over to the boy and pulling him up by the arm.

"I was just trying to examine the quality of the gauntlet so I could advise him for a price to sell it when he recovered!" The boy, who had been identified as Lithmenar, explained.

"You were trying to steal the gauntlet, quite obviously!" The Bartender exclaimed.

Indow stepped forward, asking, "Do you know this person?"

"Unfortunately, I do! This is Lithmenar, a self-proclaimed trader and merchant. In reality, however, he is a common thief!" The Bartender growled.

"I am not a thief!" Lithmenar protested.

"You," The Bartender said, pushing his finger against Lithmenar's chest, "are a thief!"

Lithmenar rolled his eyes then walked back against the wall, freeing himself from the Bartender's grasp. He straightened his clothes, then calmly walked out of the door, pushing past the people who were still gathered there. The Bartender walked back over to Indow and the Healer.

"Should we be concerned about further attempts to rob us by him?" Indow inquired.

"Not at all. Lithmenar copes with failure very well. Any time he fails to steal something, he doesn't try it again. 'If I can't steal it the first time, it's not worth my time to try it again,' is what I've heard him say when he gets drunk enough." The Bartender replied.

He then turned to Indow and said, "You need not worry, Priestess. Your young friend shall be in good care. Now, let us leave him to rest while we go and work on my payment."

Indow smiled and nodded, following the Bartender out of the room as the crowd around the room began to dissipate, people returning to the bar or to the room they were staying at. The Bartender led Indow down the hallway, to the farthest room from the bar. She figured that this room was the one that the Bartender lived in. She also reminded herself to get the Bartender's name after she paid him. The Bartender unlocked the door to his room with a small key, then allowed Indow to go in first. When she was inside, the Bartender entered and closed and locked the door behind him. The room wasn't too large, but still bigger than any of the other rooms in the inn. The Bartender sat down on the bed and smiled at Indow.

"And now you may pay me, my dear." he said sweetly.

Indow nodded and smiled. She then slid her robes off of her arms and let them fall to the floor...

The Fine CommentaryShow

So Linkara's got himself the Silent Death, that plague that got brought up in last chapter's history lesson. Indow is also kind enough to explain it yet again, but there are some distinctive differences:

• Indow's dad made it sound that the Silent Death still breaks out every now and then, but Indow herself confirms the last known outbreak was 500 years ago
• Indow's dad was aware of viruses and how they work, while Indow herself doesn't

I think that last bit was so Linkara could educate her on why he's got the Silent Death:

"Well, the reason it hasn't appeared in over five hundred years is because people have developed natural immunities. Survival of the fittest is an actual fact in terms of genetics, because a strong immune system is going to be able to fight off diseases better than a weak one. Indow, this planet and the people on it, yourself included, have had over five hundred years to develop natural immunities to this Silent Death thing, the disease is still around but it's just that it doesn't affect the people in it. I've never encountered the disease before on my world. I've got immunities to chicken pox, smallpox, polio, and probably a couple more diseases I can't think of. It's only natural that I'd get inflicted with the Silent Death."

I thought the Silent Death was a virus that keeps mutating? Why do you think we have another brand of flu every year?
Also it's nice that the isekai teleportation service saw it fit to give him the ability to decipher ancient writing, but didn't think it important to give him immunity to the Sin version of the fucking Measles. Whoever runs this service should read War of the Worlds.
Also how can Indow be so sure that this rash must be the work of a disease that has been dead for 500 years?

"My lord, you don't understand! It's called the Silent Death because it brings about death!

Your dad also told us it's called the Silent Death because your ability to speak is the first thing to go, yet here we are listening to Linkara's dubious understanding of how viruses work.

"Well... There's no way we can reach Walsz now in the little time you have, much less your condition will make it hard for you to ride a horse. However, I have heard of several taverns and inns that could help us provided I could find one..." Indow replied.

If the people in your fucking church wouldn't be a help, what makes you think that some random inn in bumfuck nowhere would have an expert on dead viruses?

I'm assuming then that you'd leave me here?" Louis asked.

"I'm afraid I'll have to, my lord. There's no way I can carry you." Indow replied.

You should at least try to get him on the horse. This current setup wastes a lot of time.

*

So now we're getting multiple paragraphs about how learning magic is hard. I thought it was a lot easier, seeing how it was apparently discovered by people singing songs near mineral cocaine, but apparently it is pure torture for the min and soul that not everyone survives.
I guess we're getting this information solely because the chapter is now primarily from Indow's perspective. It's certainly not because she actually does any magic stuff. In fact all she does could be accomplished by an ordinary wench.

She had been riding for hours but hadn't been paying attention to the road!

There could have been dozens of places I could've stopped, and I was too busy worrying to pay attention!

"I was so busy looking for help that I didn't actually look for help!"

As she came up to the tavern, she slowed the horse down, reading the sign that hung on a post. It said the tavern's name was the "Leaping Ghost Tavern & Inn."

I guess we can file "ghosts" under "things that don't have stupid new name on Sin".

Seeng a Linkaran priestess enter the inn causes a record scratch moment for the merry travelers, but eventually the bartender decides to ready a carriage to haul Linkara's carcass back to the inn.

He whispered into her ear, "We'll discuss the issue of my repayment on the way to your friend."

*

"Is that acceptable payment?" Indow asked.

The bartender grinned. "Quite acceptable. I'll want payment after we've gotten your friend back to the tavern."

The two volunteer guards for this trip are a dwarf (who is apparently weird for riding a horse) and some long-haired, blonde pretty boy who is pretty much Allen Schezar from Escaflowne.

Indow wondered for a moment if this man was a member of the Linkara, for his mannerism and his general appearance seemed to make him look that way. She blushed slightly at some of the thoughts that ran through her head; thoughts not appropriate for a Linkaran Priestess.

Oh, that's definitely Allen.

However, they are not the first the reach the body of the Linkara:

However, she then noticed the two large creatures that stood over the person. She gasped as she realized they were both eight feet tall, and covered in a thick green skin. One carried a large cudgel, whereas the other had a spiked mace.

"Orcs!" Indow exclaimed.

Unfortunately the orcs didn't have time to enact righetous revenge for the death of their friend. The dwarf turns out to be mostly useless, but best boy Allen murders them like a boss.
Indow, meanwhile, does fuckall to protect her Lord and Savior.

Indow rubbed his arm sympathetically before turning away and walking towards the bartender and a healer who had been staying at the inn.

Oh, so there was a healer after all. Good to know.

"Will he live?" Indow asked.

"It's difficult to say. I believe so, but his body is quite different than the men of this world. I do, however, fully trust that he shall make a complete recovery in a day or two." The Healer replied.

How the fuck do you know that? Do you have a medical tricorder?

All of a sudden, an intense scream interrupted Indow. It had come from just behind the group, so the three turned and faced towards the bed, trying to see what had happened.

Turns out Linkara's body didn't have time to get warm from the blanket, and yet some teenager thief was already trying to steal his Power Glove while three other people were still in the room. Either he's incredibly dumb, or running some Sneak/Invisibility build.

Indow stepped forward, asking, "Do you know this person?"

"Unfortunately, I do! This is Lithmenar, a self-proclaimed trader and merchant. In reality, however, he is a common thief!" The Bartender growled.

And no one has decided to shank this known thief and feed him to the pigs - or at least cut off his hands - because...?

"Should we be concerned about further attempts to rob us by him?" Indow inquired.

"Not at all. Lithmenar copes with failure very well. Any time he fails to steal something, he doesn't try it again. 'If I can't steal it the first time, it's not worth my time to try it again,' is what I've heard him say when he gets drunk enough." The Bartender replied.

Oh, he has a stupid code of honor. That explains everything.

The Bartender led Indow down the hallway, to the farthest room from the bar.

Time for the "payment".

She also reminded herself to get the Bartender's name after she paid him.

Just quoting this because it's a lot more sinister in hindsight.

The Bartender sat down on the bed and smiled at Indow.

"And now you may pay me, my dear." he said sweetly.

Indow nodded and smiled. She then slid her robes off of her arms and let them fall to the floor...

That's right. Linkara gets cucked in his own self-insert power fantasy.

Next Time: Indow does Ai.

[Musical Space Cowboy]

That's right. Linkara gets cucked in his own self-insert power fantasy.

That's because he doesn't want a girl with those filthy holes. He is waiting for his one true dickgirl to live his nasty cockslut fantasies.

[wulfenlord]

Dude, she's 14. I was already cringing when Linkara drools over them, but he had the excuse of being a teenager himself at the time.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

I'm sure 14 is well within the age of consenst in the land of Ai.
Also apparently they didn't bring any money with them? I swear as soon as the story switches to her perspective she tries to solve everything with sex.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Book 1, Chapter 7 - Secrets, Bargains, and Lies I
(Or: Munching carpet for the Lord)

So last time was all about Indow finding help to save her sorry savior's ass from the plague. Apparently she forgot to take even a single korin from the church's coffers, for her main way of "paying" for stuff appears to be spreading her legs.
I guess this was written before The Lightbringer became a feminist, but still funny how sleazy this shit is.

We also meet some kind of comic relief thief (who somehow hasn't been killed by an angry mob yet), who I fear will be a recurring character because he has an actual name, instead of the narration just calling him by his race or profession.
Then again that one dwarf merchant got a name, and I'm sure we've seen the last of that guy.

Also for some reason this chapter is the first in the "Secrets, Bargains, and Lies" trilogy of chapters, with chapters 12 and 18 being the other two. Who knows if this will have any signifiance.

LiesShow

"It's not working!" Indow shouted, banging one of her fists against the wall.

"I am sorry, Priestess. I've done everything I could." The Healer stated.

Indow's mood sank instantly. It was now the next day, and although Louis had not died like originally predicted, the cure wasn't reversing or stopping the course of the disease, but slowing it down a little. The lesions were still spreading farther down his chest and at the base of his chin. They were turning an even darker shade of black, and his body was already beginning to show signs of atrophy. He was still unconscious, and even if he didn't die of the illness, the lack of food, water, and activity would destroy it without a doubt.

"But why?! Why didn't the cure work?!" Indow demanded to know.

"Like I said last night, Priestess, his body is different somehow from other men of this land. The cure simply didn't have the same effects on him as it does with others." the Healer stated.

"But you have to do something! Give him the cure for Dwarf Hathoj, or try to make up a cure in the time he has left!" Indow pleaded.

"There is nothing more I can do. It would take months if not years to study his unique physiology. If I give him any other kinds of cures, they may kill him instead of help him." The Healer explained.

Indow looked over at Louis, tears welling up in her eyes. The bartender put a hand one her shoulder to try to comfort her.

"I'm sorry about your friend." He stated.

Indow took in a deep breath, still staring at Louis' limp form on the bed. "About him? As much as I appreciate your sentiment, it's not him you should feel sorry for. Very soon, you'll be mourning our entire world."

*

Indow sat alone at a table, her head resting on her arms as she slumped onto the table. Thoughts and ideas were moving through her head quickly in an attempt to discern a plan on what to do now that Louis was more than likely going to die. The first idea that she had was to try to locate some healing spells, examine and make sure that there were absolutely no spells that could be used to heal the Silent Death. But she reconsidered it quickly, realizing that because of how long it would take to get the books to the Inn.

The next idea was to ask around the Inn, see if any of the people currently there were potionists, people who specialized in making potions of different varieties. She had heard rumors about certain potions that had even cured the Althos Hegrai, a muscular disease that made its victim waste away by destroying their muscles. But she also decided against that. The chances of finding an experienced potionist were slim to none, and to add insult to injury none of the potions would probably work on his physiology, which was unique in this world, as the Healer had stated.

"Is he the Linkara?" she asked herself.

She spoke silently to herself at the table. The question she had just asked kept repeating over and over again in her mind. The Linkara was supposed to be the savior of her world, the being that would fight the Darkness head-on and save Sin. But how could he accomplish this if a disease ravaged his body?

"It's Ironic. The being who could hold his ground against a legion of Dark Knights will die at the hands of a disease that was thought to be cured centuries ago." She said bitterly.

"Dark Knights are approaching!"

Indow gasped and brought her head up, looking around the bar to see where they were coming from. She thought that everyone would either be seeking cover or reaching for a weapon, but instead, the warriors merely put their hands on their weapons, while the talking and chatter within the bar decreased in volume. Indow got up and approached the bartender, who was readying a fresh pot of meat and a few bottles of ale.

"If Dark Knights are approaching, why aren't we preparing for combat?" Indow inquired.

Hurriedly, the bartender replied, "Those bastard Knights may never smile, but they do need to eat and drink like everyone else. They come here, they stay the night, have a few ales, tell tales of their victories. You, however, should not mention that you are Linkaran. They've killed Linkaran followers before when they've tried to challenge them here. We've also set up a policy concerning conduct within the bar when they're here. No yelling or loud speech, drink a bit less so you don't get too drunk... You know, that sort of thing."

Indow nodded and sat back down at her table. She looked over at the door and saw it slowly open. The first Dark Knight to come in was female, and wearing a helmet with horns on it, indicating that she was the leader of the group. She was followed into the tavern by a half-dozen troops, all wearing the exact same black armor, all of them with hair dark as pitch. They all had pale skin and none of them, not a single one, was smiling.

Indow sneered under her breathe at the Dark Knights, especially their female leader. She had heard of females joining the Darkness, but she'd never seen one, or even heard of one in Ai, for that matter. As a matter of fact, Indow was beginning to suspect that Louis had been right concerning the King of Ai: the increasing amount of Dark Knights in Ai was suspicious. How were so many of the Darkness' forces coming into the land without at least some of them being forced back by the army?

The woman took a slow look around the room, not paying any special attention to any particular person in the room. She then lifted her helmet off, her long black hair flowing out of it. She then faced the bartender, her face just as pale as her troops and her eyes as dark as her hair.

"My name is Myrrha, Potent First Class of the 28th Dark Knight Assault Squad." She stated.

28th?! Indow thought. Just how many Dark Knights are there in Ai?!

Dark Knights never just sent a division of their troops into any mission, they were always buffered by as many forces below them, so when Myrrha said she commanded the 28th Assault Squad, that meant there were 27 other Squads in Ai as well. There may even have been more if the 28th wasn't the biggest Squad.

"Welcome to the Leaping Ghost, Potent." the Bartender said.

"I require seven rooms for my Squad." Myrrha stated.

"For how long shall you be here?"

"Overnight."

"Very well, I'll get you some keys."

Myrrha nodded, and the bartender exited into a backroom behind the bar. Indow sighed, thinking of how Louis would have probably already have challenged the Dark Knights and vanquished them all. After the bartender returned with keys to their rooms, he gave Indow a glass of water.

"People come here to drink. Drink this and don't say anything unless you want to end up with the same fate as your friend." the Bartender whispered.

Indow cringed at his words as he walked off. She held the glass of water tightly in her hands as small tears rolled down her cheeks. She let go of the glass and buried her face in her own arms on the table. She sat like that for what seemed like hours, until she overheard something that Myrrha suddenly mentioned.

"Bah! Wizards have never been a problem for my troops or myself. In fact, I once encountered the great Sorcerer Vsevellar. He attempted to use lightning spells to repel me after I 'respectfully' asked him to make me an incineration potion. But his spells were no match for the black steel of my sword, though!" she exclaimed.

Indow didn't hear any of Myrrha's companions laughing in joy for hearing the brief tale, but merely some grunting in acknowledgment. She had heard of Vsevellar, the great Wizard. He was rumored to be a member of the Order of the New Blood's latest covenant, but his reputation had cleared him of any charge of it. He was known throughout the lands as a great sorcerer and potionist. It was a sad thing of this Myrrha had indeed struck him down.

"After I killed him, I raided his entire storehouse of potions. In fact, I still have his greatest creation with me: a potion designed to heal any injury or illness. Even the worst case of the Silent Death can be healed!"

Indow's eyes widened when she heard that. The first idea that came to her head was to ask Myrrha for it, but immediately realized that such an action would be futile. No Dark Knight would give up a potion like that out of the, for lack of a better term, goodness of their heart. However, a new plan was already forming in her mind. Even Dark Knights could get drunk and have to rest at some point, and she'd take advantage of that fact. She'd wait until the Squadron of Dark Knights retired to their bedchambers, then sneak into Myrrha's room and take the potion go give to Louis!

Indow giggled silently to keep her sound out of the hearing of the Dark Knights and thought, the perfect crime...

*

Indow had originally thought that sneaking through the dark hallways of the Leaping Ghost Tavern and Inn would've been a problem, but it turned out that the bar had a semi-large midnight crowd, so the hallways were lit with candles hung on the wall dimly. She smiled, realizing she wasn't in the least bit frightened. She had seen and experienced more horrible things, been on assignment from the church on worse things that she had been afraid of. This was child's play compared to the things she was used to doing.

But then she realized the price for failure was so high. If Myrrha awoke during her search through the bags, and interrogated her, she might realize that Indow was traveling with the Linkara. If she did that, diseased or not, she'd take the opportunity to kill him.

So she just had to make sure that she didn't awaken.

Indow slid a key into the lock on her door, one she had 'borrowed' from the bartender. The door didn't make a sound as it opened, not even the usual creak of wood moving. Indow speculated that the bartender had recently oiled the hinges to remove the squeaks. For what purpose, only the heavens would know.

The light of the candle she had in her hand shined throughout the small room that Myrrha slept in. Myrrha herself was on her bed, breathing in what could be considered controlled tones. Indow moved the candle slowly left and right, trying to determine where Myrrha would put this most valuable potion. She then looked down and saw a hard leather pouch, tied tightly. She went down and pulled a small dagger from her gown, and cut the knot that protected the item within the pouch. Indow smiled as she pulled from it a round bottle, corked of course, with a glowing green liquid within it.

All of a sudden, Indow froze. She gulped and took in a deep breath as she instantly felt it.

The black steel of a Dark Knight's sword against her throat.

"I saw some of the robes you were in before, Priestess. You would've done better to try to kill me BEFORE you robbed me." Myrrha stated.

Indow took in another deep breath as she stiffened even more. "If I had killed you, they would immediately have known it was me. I don't know how long it will take for this potion to take effect."

"So, your goal is actually the healing potion! You should not jump to conclusions about things you find in someone else's stash, Priestess. The potion you hold in your
hands is an infectious disease that can reduce a group of your precious Linkaran Knights within moments to dust. The Healing potion I keep on my body at all times, for if I am injured in combat, it will rejuvenate my power and allow me to defeat whatever vile fighter stands in my way of serving the Great Darkness. Tell me, Priestess, why did you take such a risk?" Myrrha asked.

Indow sighed and took in a deep breath. "Come with me."

She led Myrrha out of the room and down the corridor to the ending room, unlocking and opening it slowly. The two then crept in, although it didn't matter that they had. Not even a crashing sound could've brought Louis up from his unconsciousness. Indow pointed at Louis, whose face was beginning to cover with the black lesions. Myrrha raised in eyebrow as she began to comprehend Indow's actions.

"He is my friend and traveling companion. I've known him for years, ever since we were children. He has become infected with the Silent Death, and the Healers here have already tried several treatments and all have failed. That potion of yours is his last hope." Indow stated.

Myrrha took a good, long look at Louis, examining every part of his frail and limp body that was infected with the horrible disease. She then nodded.

"Very well, I shall give you the potion." She said.

Indow could hardly believe it. "You- you will?"

"Not for free, of course. But yes, I will have this friend of yours cured, but I want two things in return."

"Name them!"

"The first is that you shall owe the Darkness a great favor in the future."

Indow nodded. With Louis healed, he'll destroy that which you serve so I won't need to worry about that part.

"And secondly, you and I must have sex."

Indow's eyes widened. She looked up into Myrrha's face, gaping at her.

"Pardon me?!"

"Despite propaganda to the contrary, the Dark Knights do take some pride in their work. Although we never smile, we do enjoy the rigors of physical expressions of 'love.' We have sex, but mainly to ease tension or to produce more soldiers for the Darkness' Great Army. Also, my young Priestess, for you and I to engage in such an activity... You would have the eternal shame of having been forced to have sex with your most hated enemy, you never again being a 'pure' Priestess. Now, do you accept the terms of the agreement, Priestess?" Myrrha said.

Indow turned to look at Louis. Even though he wasn't conscious, she could see the pain he was going through by the single tear that escaped his eye and moved down his lesion-covered face.

"I accept."

*

Despite the potion's ability to heal, it certainly didn't help Louis' general feeling of health through his body. His mouth was dry and tasted oddly, his face and neck felt itchy and his stomach a little queasy. He rubbed his face a little, feeling a dead, crusty skin fall off him. When he opened his eyes, he saw the skin that had come off of his face was actually black and wrinkled. He raised an eyebrow in surprise, but then winced when a little bit of pain shot through his stomach.

Erg... Last thing I remember was talking with Indow about that Silent Death thing... She must've gotten the cure!

Because of his parched mouth, Louis kicked the sheets and blankets off of him and got up in search of water or something cold to drink. He yawned and stretched out his muscles and instantly regretted it. Although the stretching felt good, his muscles felt tired immediately afterwards. Still, he resisted the urge to sit or lie back down again and instead moved towards the door and opened it. He had no idea what time it was, but it looked like it was late at night from the dim hallways and candles lining the walls.

Despite that one piece of deductive reasoning, Louis wasn't in a very focused state at that moment. Some objects around him were blurry, and the nausea in his stomach was coming and going at random. He tripped a little, staggering onto a door and slamming against it. He winced and shook his head, reaching for the doorknob and opening it quickly. When he did, his senses half-returned as he stared at the sight before him. He couldn't make out the woman she was with, but whoever she was, Indow was lying on top of her, both of them naked and sweaty. They obviously hadn't noticed him yet, because they were rubbing up against each other and moaning loudly. And so, Louis did the only thing he felt he could do: turn around, walk out, close the door, and return to his room.

*

By the time Indow had awoken the next morning, she realized two facts. The first being that the Dark Knights had apparently left earlier, because Myrrha's things were gone from her room. The second thing was that Louis was alive. Indow smiled as she saw Healers with shocked looks on their faces rush in the direction of Louis' room. Indow jumped with glee as she left Myrrha's room and ran down the corridor into Louis' room. And she almost collapsed in happiness as she saw him sitting up in the bed, a tray with food over his lap.

"Oh, no, no, it's a fair approximation. It's just the eggs that we use to make French toast where I come from come from an animal known as a chicken!" Louis stated.

"Chicken? I can't believe it, but the word itself seems to be funny!" The bartender chuckled.

"Many where I come from would agree with you. Ah! Indow, come in! Come in!" Louis said.

Indow smiled and walked inside the room, Louis shoeing away the remaining healers and the Bartender, saying, "When I finally get myself out of this bed, I'll tell you guys about the REAL way to defeat Dark Knights."

The people chuckled, exiting the room quickly, leaving only Indow and Louis, who both hugged.

"That's twice now that you've saved my life, Indow. This is starting to stack up." Louis stated.

"I live only to serve at the will of you, my lord." Indow replied.

"That's nice to know. Oh! By the way, I've been meaning to ask you: who was that woman you were having sex with last night?" Louis asked inquisitively.

Indow froze, feeling the blood draining from her face.

How could he have found out?! she thought.

"How- how did you-"

"I woke up in the middle of the night last night, and stumbled into where you were doing it. So, who was she?"

Indow gulped, her heart beginning to pound a little harder. She wanted to tell him about her... unusual habits and desires, but she instantly thought of how he would judge her. A Linkaran Priestess was supposed to be pure of both body and soul, and Indow was not entirely pure. To make matters worse, it had been with both a female AND a Dark Knight. She had to try to bluff her way out of it.

"No-no one, my lord. J-just the person I negotiated with for the cure. It was but a one-time thing just to get the cure from her..." Indow said with a rasp.

Louis shrugged. "Okay. I just never realized you were a lesbian."

And now, Indow let out a sigh of relief within herself, but the became confused by his words. "A what, my lord?"

"A lesbian." Louis replied.

Indow stared at him blankly.

"A woman who erm... 'falls in love' with other women." Louis said uneasily.

Indow giggled and said, "Oh, my lord, you misunderstand! I can be with a strong heart for both men and women."

"Ah. Well, Indow, as fun as this little conversation has been, we must go to the bar and entertain those fine people with tales of hardship and battles! And then, my dear, it's on to Walsz!" Louis exclaimed.

TruthShow

The healer's potions aren't strong enough for Linkara.

"Like I said last night, Priestess, his body is different somehow from other men of this land. The cure simply didn't have the same effects on him as it does with others." the Healer stated.

I wonder if we will ever find out what exactly is different about him.

Indow looked over at Louis, tears welling up in her eyes. The bartender put a hand one her shoulder to try to comfort her.

"I'm sorry about your friend." He stated.

"Luckily you have finally found a penis with enough girth to satisfy you."

*

The first idea that she had was to try to locate some healing spells, examine and make sure that there were absolutely no spells that could be used to heal the Silent Death. But she reconsidered it quickly, realizing that because of how long it would take to get the books to the Inn.

Heaven fucking forbid the spellcaster actually tries to solve problems with spells.

The next idea was to ask around the Inn, see if any of the people currently there were potionists, people who specialized in making potions of different varieties.

...

But she also decided against that. The chances of finding an experienced potionist were slim to none, and to add insult to injury none of the potions would probably work on his physiology, which was unique in this world, as the Healer had stated.

Boy I sure hope what will finally end up healing Linkara isn't a potion...

"It's Ironic. The being who could hold his ground against a legion of Dark Knights will die at the hands of a disease that was thought to be cured centuries ago." She said bitterly.

Did snorting the magic dust for your little REFLECT spell during the church raid scramble your memory or something? You had to save is ass as soon as he had to fight more than one knight at a time.

"Dark Knights are approaching!"

Oh, if only. Apparently the Dark Knights are regular customers, and don't actually do anything evil unless you are too Linkaran or provoke them in some other fashion. So the other guests just tense up a bit.

Hurriedly, the bartender replied, "Those bastard Knights may never smile, but they do need to eat and drink like everyone else. They come here, they stay the night, have a few ales, tell tales of their victories. You, however, should not mention that you are Linkaran. They've killed Linkaran followers before when they've tried to challenge them here. We've also set up a policy concerning conduct within the bar when they're here. No yelling or loud speech, drink a bit less so you don't get too drunk... You know, that sort of thing."

This is the lamest invasion of the forces of darkness ever. Apparently they're just a hate group shanking a few Linkarans every now and then?

Anyhow, the group of Dork Knights is led by a lady knight, which is apparently a rare thing.

As a matter of fact, Indow was beginning to suspect that Louis had been right concerning the King of Ai: the increasing amount of Dark Knights in Ai was suspicious. How were so many of the Darkness' forces coming into the land without at least some of them being forced back by the army?

Judging by this scene, it apparently helps that they're not actually doing any invading or pillaging.

"My name is Myrrha, Potent First Class of the 28th Dark Knight Assault Squad." She stated.

"Potent" is a fucking stupid title.
And you call yourselves the Dark Knights? You might as well call yourself the Bad Guy Assault Squad.

Them being the 28th freaks Indow the fuck out:

28th?! Indow thought. Just how many Dark Knights are there in Ai?!

Dark Knights never just sent a division of their troops into any mission, they were always buffered by as many forces below them, so when Myrrha said she commanded the 28th Assault Squad, that meant there were 27 other Squads in Ai as well. There may even have been more if the 28th wasn't the biggest Squad.

This sounds like a very dumb system that not only gives your enemy unnecessary information about the strength of your forces, but also would force you to renumber your squads all the time.
Also a squad is apparently 7 people? Then what were the 3-men-groups we met before called?

Myrrha nodded, and the bartender exited into a backroom behind the bar. Indow sighed, thinking of how Louis would have probably already have challenged the Dark Knights and vanquished them all.

I can see Linkara's bloodlust compelling him to start shit with people who are just minding their own business, but you are once again overselling his combat prowess. Nothing you have seen him do would suggest that he wouldn't get his ass kicked.

After the bartender returned with keys to their rooms, he gave Indow a glass of water.

"People come here to drink. Drink this and don't say anything unless you want to end up with the same fate as your friend." the Bartender whispered.

"You can pay in the usual way, my dear."

Then she overhears Myrrha (the Dark Knight Lady) boasting about how wizards suck. Seeing Indow, I can believe it.

Indow didn't hear any of Myrrha's companions laughing in joy for hearing the brief tale, but merely some grunting in acknowledgment.

Them laughing while not smiling would've been funny, tbh.

"After I killed him, I raided his entire storehouse of potions. In fact, I still have his greatest creation with me: a potion designed to heal any injury or illness. Even the worst case of the Silent Death can be healed!"

Sure, she had just accepted that potions would be useless because of Linkara's unspecificed physiological differences, but I'm sure this is the strongest of potions that will do the trick.
No seriouls, she plans to steal it. Once again withou using any fancy magic.

She'd wait until the Squadron of Dark Knights retired to their bedchambers, then sneak into Myrrha's room and take the potion go give to Louis!

Indow giggled silently to keep her sound out of the hearing of the Dark Knights and thought, the perfect crime...

*

The next portion starts weird:

Indow had originally thought that sneaking through the dark hallways of the Leaping Ghost Tavern and Inn would've been a problem, but it turned out that the bar had a semi-large midnight crowd, so the hallways were lit with candles hung on the wall dimly. She smiled, realizing she wasn't in the least bit frightened. She had seen and experienced more horrible things, been on assignment from the church on worse things that she had been afraid of. This was child's play compared to the things she was used to doing.

If you're such a badass, why would sneaking through a dark hallway be considered "a problem"?

Indow slid a key into the lock on her door, one she had 'borrowed' from the bartender. The door didn't make a sound as it opened, not even the usual creak of wood moving. Indow speculated that the bartender had recently oiled the hinges to remove the squeaks. For what purpose, only the heavens would know.

He likes to sneak up on people for his "payment".

All of a sudden, Indow froze. She gulped and took in a deep breath as she instantly felt it.

The black steel of a Dark Knight's sword against her throat.

"I saw some of the robes you were in before, Priestess. You would've done better to try to kill me BEFORE you robbed me." Myrrha stated.

Nice job, Indow.

Indow took in another deep breath as she stiffened even more. "If I had killed you, they would immediately have known it was me. I don't know how long it will take for this potion to take effect."

How? The knights made no indication of even knowing of your existence. It's more likely they would've torched the entire place.

Turns out this isn't the healing potion, but Myrrha got curious.
And Indow decides to lead her to the Linkara.

Luckily she doesn't suspect anything and buys Indow's story about him being a childhood friend. It's sure is nice that Indow hasn't been repeating Rain's mistake of telling everyone about the Linkara.
For some reason Myrrha is willing to hand over the potion, but there's of course the question of "payment".

"Not for free, of course. But yes, I will have this friend of yours cured, but I want two things in return."

"Name them!"

"The first is that you shall owe the Darkness a great favor in the future."

Indow nodded. With Louis healed, he'll destroy that which you serve so I won't need to worry about that part.

"And secondly, you and I must have sex."

*

The potion ends up working despite his body being "built differently". He wakes up in the middle of the night, stumbles around drunkenly and just so happens to randomly open the door where Indow and the knight were fucking.

They obviously hadn't noticed him yet, because they were rubbing up against each other and moaning loudly. And so, Louis did the only thing he felt he could do: turn around, walk out, close the door, and return to his room.

What a hero.

*

Come next morning, and Indow finds Linkara to be a charming inn guest who has become BFF with the bartender.

"Oh, no, no, it's a fair approximation. It's just the eggs that we use to make French toast where I come from come from an animal known as a chicken!" Louis stated.

"Chicken? I can't believe it, but the word itself seems to be funny!" The bartender chuckled.

"Many where I come from would agree with you. Ah! Indow, come in! Come in!" Louis said.

You sure that's still Linkara?

"When I finally get myself out of this bed, I'll tell you guys about the REAL way to defeat Dark Knights."

He might actually turn the tide of the war (that is apparently going on) if he teaches more people the way of the groin kick.

Then our hero decides to be a dick to Indow.

"I live only to serve at the will of you, my lord." Indow replied.

"That's nice to know. Oh! By the way, I've been meaning to ask you: who was that woman you were having sex with last night?" Louis asked inquisitively.

Indow gulped, her heart beginning to pound a little harder. She wanted to tell him about her... unusual habits and desires, but she instantly thought of how he would judge her.

"I dream about having sex while dressed as the legendary Green Emenem..."

Louis shrugged. "Okay. I just never realized you were a lesbian."

You know, for someone who has the hots for her, you're pretty cool with her not being interested in dudes.
Also how could you realize this? I'm pretty sure the time you have spent with her where you were actually conscious is less than a day.

Naturally Indow has never heard the word "lesbian".

Indow stared at him blankly.

"A woman who erm... 'falls in love' with other women." Louis said uneasily.

Indow giggled and said, "Oh, my lord, you misunderstand! I can be with a strong heart for both men and women."

"Ah. Well, Indow, as fun as this little conversation has been, we must go to the bar and entertain those fine people with tales of hardship and battles! And then, my dear, it's on to Walsz!" Louis exclaimed.

Catgirl confirmed bi. Day saved.
Also maybe a weird way to get back on track? Dude ended this dialogue tree like it's a RPG or something.

Next Time: Unless the author comes up with new filler material, we might actually see the Linkara start his fucking quest.

[wulfenlord]

>writes power fantasy
>gets cucked again and again

It gets ever clearer that he takes everything he can get IRL

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

It doesn't count when it's with a chick, and he hasn't found out about the bartender (yet).

[Complicity]

>writes power fantasy
>gets cucked again and again

Cuckoldry is the power fantasy of the straight guy who wants a dick in his mouth, and another one up his butt.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Book 1, Chapter 8 - King's Test I
(Or: Quest for the Cringe)

Oh, fuck me. Another multi-parter for a chapter title. At least part 2 is the very next chapter, instead of being spread all over the place.

Anyhow, when last we left our heroes(?), we had to suffer through a questionable filler arc where Indow was forced to sell her body and immortal soul to save Linkara's ass, which he thanked her by forcing her through a short struggle session where she had to reveal her sexual orientation (bi, of course).
We also learned the following:

• Our isekai hero has not been blessed with immunities against Sin-exclusive viruses. I'm sure this will never be brought up ever again in this story (because it has served its purpose already), but this effectively means that he should be dead by the end of the month. And that's not even going into the bacteria.
• His genetic makeup is also different from a Sinian human, which so far has resulted in potions not working quite as well on him (except when they do). You can probably also file this under "Shit that will never be brought up again"
• Linkara (the author) should never write female characters ever again

Author's WordsShow

"The sun is shining, and the grass is green! Under the three feet of snow, I mean. This is a day when it's hard to wear a frooooown!"

"My lord, what ever are you doing?"

"SINGING! It feels great to sing, Indow! Look all around us, the world is bright and exciting, and we're only a few minutes away with the horses walking from Walsz, our destination!" Louis exclaimed.

Indow sighed and continued leading the horse down the hill towards Walsz. Over the last few days, the two had left the Leaping Ghost Tavern and Inn and proceeded without delay towards Walsz, capitol of Ai. They had run into a small band of Orcs, but by working as a team, Indow's magicks and Louis' ability to kick things in the crotch, they had easily disposed of the opposition to their advance towards Walsz.

"Orcs are backup soldiers for the Darkness." Indow had said. "The Dark Knights are always the first line of defense and attack for it. The Orcs are mainly laborers and cannon fodder. Occasionally a few will separate themselves from the Darkness and try to make livings for themselves as thieves, mercenaries, and so forth, but few succeed."

Louis smiled and then suddenly stopped his horse. Indow, surprised by the action, stopped as well. Louis was still smiling, but his eyes were shifting from the left to the right and vice versa.

"My lord, why have we stopped?" Indow asked.

"Because," Louis explained. "we're being followed.

"Well, I guess you caught me, then." said a voice that came from nearby bushes behind the two.

Indow winced and prepared to make the horse gallop away in case it was a Dark Knight or an Orc. Louis merely glared at the bushes, narrowing his eyes as the blade from his gauntlet quickly slid out. However, instead of the being coming out of the bushes being something that served the Darkness, it was a boy not seventeen years old, with sandy blonde hair, expensive boots, hard leather armor, and a metallic waistband. Louis didn't recognize him, but Indow did.

"You're that man who tried to steal my lord's gauntlet!" she exclaimed.

"Hey! I was only examining it to give him an advisement for prices-"

But before Lithmenar could finish what he was saying, Louis leapt off his horse and held the blade to his throat. Lithmenar froze, gulping as he looked down into the eyes of his captor.

"You," Louis said. "tried to steal my gauntlet?"

Lithmenar gulped once more, rasping out, "Yes, sir!"

Louis smiled and released Lithmenar's throat. "Okay, just wanted to know that. Now why are you following us?"

Lithmenar smiled himself, standing straight and tall. "Okay, I admit it, I'm a thief. And as a thief and a merchant I happen to have an acute sense for business opportunities. For example, I have deduced that you are the Linkara, the savior that was prophesied in the ancient Prophecies of the Linkara. As such, you are no doubt going to be dealing with armies, Kings, High Priests, etc., etc. If I stick around you guys, I'm sure to make a successful profit!"

Indow narrowed her eyes at Lithmenar, growling lightly. "We face the Darkness to save our world, thief! We do not do so to fulfill personal profit!"

"Not so hasty, Indow. A thief may be of use to us." Louis stated.

"What do you mean?" Indow asked.

"As a thief, this man probably has skills that can be of value to us. Pick pocketing, good eavesdropping skills, financial and political connections within a few governments. Some people that may owe him a favor or two." Louis explained.

"Guilty as charged. Now, shall we proceed to Walsz?" Lithmenar asked.

*

Once more, Louis was reminded of his trip to France. This time, it was his memories of the cities of Aix and St. Paul De Vence. The entire city looked like it was constantly imbued by the sun's glorious light, and there was not one person along the streets that appeared as though they were unhappy or depressed. And seeing such happiness and bright faces brought a smile right to Louis' face. Despite his heavy swearing and disgruntled nature towards certain stimuli, Louis always considered himself a 'nice guy.'

Despite his happiness, Louis made sure to keep a close watch on Lithmenar. Louis had a trusting nature, but he knew not to turn your back on someone you just met. Indow certainly doesn't trust him. I wonder if more happened at the Inn than she let on... he thought. Louis shrugged to himself and continued onwards, amazed at the detail some of the buildings in the city displayed. The buildings weren't more than two stories on any of them, but some had arch shapes built directly into the buildings. Most of the windows had odd patterns to them, but beautiful ones nonetheless. They almost reminded Louis of medieval European Rose paintings.

"We're coming up on the church now, my lord." Indow stated to Louis.

Louis smiled and nodded, turning his attention to the rode up ahead. He then gasped as he stared at the church not twenty feet away from him. This church appeared even larger than the one he had previously been at, and was definitely more of an eyesore. Gigantic pillars held up a large arched doorway, with about a dozen small steps leading up to it. In an incredible feet [sic] of metallurgy for the era they were in, the church itself was made of a mixture of stone and marble bricks, and in a similar contrast to the Notre Dame Church on Earth, statues were carved directly into the stone entryway, showing what appeared to be battles between armies of men and one faceless angel against Dark Knights, Orcs, and odd demonic beings taking the rear of the army of darkness.

Louis could only speculate that the statues embodied something from the Prophecies of the Linkara, the faceless Angel maybe even being himself. What caught his eye now was the small man who was exiting the large wooden doors of the church. He was balding, although he appeared to be in his early forties. A thick beard also covered his chin and sides of his face. He wore robes similar to those worn by Garik, the same white color to them. He smiled widely, almost trembling with anticipation. When the three had gotten close enough, he spoke:

"Welcome, my lord, to the Second Church of the Linkara! It is a distinct honor and pleasure to finally meet you! Needless to say, if we had known sooner that you were coming, the Church would've been more prepared to properly anticipate your needs and those of your companions, but we only got word of your arrival two days ago!" the man exclaimed.

Louis was still smiling, but raised an eyebrow in surprise. "You were expecting us?"

"Oh, yes! Word travels fast between churches, my lord. Now, please come in! I'm sure you are quite famished by your trip! My humble church has prepared a great feast in your honor, my lord! Please, come in, come in!"

*

After the rather large lunch had been served and consumed in honor of Louis' arrival, the group all sat around the dining table, all looking quite full and pleased. Louis himself smiled and leaned back into the chair. He then looked over at Danlor, who sat at the head of the table.

"As wonderful as that meal was, Danlor, I'm afraid I came here to discuss certain things that have come to my attention while I was staying at the First Church. I believe that the King of Ai is in league with the Darkness." Louis stated.

Danlor stared at Louis in disbelief. "But- but that's not possible! The King may have some objections to the Linkaran faith, but he'd never go as far as to betray this country to the Darkness!"

"It seems he has, High Priest. When the Linkara was discovered in the Sorceress Rain Vendre's cottage, the Dark Knights stated that they were sent on the authority of the King of Ai." Indow explained.

Danlor sat back in his chair, utterly amazed by this. However, he then winced and shook his head. "Well, the King has been acting strangely lately..."

"In what way?" Louis inquired.

"Most of the people in the city are kept abridged of activities of the military along Ai's southern border most because of the amount of men from the city are sent there when they enlist into the army. Well, more recently, there have been recent reports of increased activity of Dark Knights coming across the border. The tales say that they've been ordered to avoid confrontation with them at all cost, and other say that their positions are usually moving further and further away from the center of the defensive perimeter!" Danlor explained.

"Almost as if we were openly inviting the Dark Knights to invade!" Lithmenar conjectured.

"Exactly! And I hear that anytime someone speaks up against the troop movements, they are imprisoned in the King's Dungeons! It is why I am reluctant to speak of the matter..." Danlor stated, wincing.

"It's all right, Danlor. It seems that we'll have to confront the King ourselves! Not now, however. First of all, I hear that another piece of the Linkaran scrolls is located here. I'd like to examine it." Louis said.

Danlor nodded and got up from the table. "I shall be happy to bring it hear, my lord."

*

"This one's different from the last one." Louis stated, examining the text.

Danlor nodded. "Yes, it is written in a different language. To symbolize the union of all people on Sin, each verse is written in a different language. Some of the scrolls are written in languages none have been able to translate just yet. We've mostly translated this one, if you'd like to read it."

"No need, I can still read it. 'Only the Chat-Najil can fight the darkness' influence and pure, blinding evil. There shall be one uniquely gifted to wield Chat-Najil.' What's Chat-Najil?" Louis asked.

Danlor winced and replied, "You know, we really don't know. It's the only word in this entire text that we can't translate. Read on, my lord. You seem to know more about the great texts than we do."

Louis nodded. "'He shall be clothed in patterns most mysterious, and his mannerism and words shall be strange and distant from the ears of those that dwell upon Sin. Fear not his words! Fear not his mannerism! Fear not him, for he shall be the one who eliminates evil. His span of life shall be fourteen kiros, and he shall possess an attitude unlike any other on Sin. Know one other thing of him: he shall not know of his mission when he is revealed unto thee.' Well, if that doesn't seal the deal for me being the Linkara, nothing will." Louis said with a smile.

"Indeed, my lord. Rain spotted the odd clothes you wore as being the first sign." Indow stated.

"Oh, what's this? 'His Chat-Najil shall come in the form of a golden metal shaped into an armor. Angels themselves, bringing with them the power to fight the demons of evil, shall imbue this armor. His Chat-Najil shall shape the armor, make it grow. The armor is an extension of the one who can wield the Chat-Najil. Each part is a segment of his spirit. The Gauntlets of Bravery and Determination. The Greaves of Swiftness. The Hauberk of Valor. The Helmet of Self-Sacrifice.' Oh, SWEET!" Louis exclaimed.

The others didn't understand his sudden joyful outburst.

Lithmenar asked, "What is it, Linkster?"

"If I understand this correctly, the Gauntlet that I wear will sometime later grow into a full-blown armor! Heh, no more crotch-kicking for Dark Knights, it'll just be plain old blade to blade!" Louis said, grinning widely.

"Is there any more?" Indow asked.

"Nope, that's it for this scroll." Louis replied.

"What do we do now, my lord?" Danlor inquired.

Louis smiled and stood up. "The only thing we can do: go to the castle and demand an explanation from the King."

*

"My lord, I really must protest this activity! To challenge the King's authority, it is punishable by death!" Danlor exclaimed.

Louis, continuing to storm through the streets with the rest of the group close behind him, responded, "And if I am who you all seem to think I am, then I don't die just yet. I have to destroy this Darkness of yours, first. And if I'm not the Linkara, then I die and you can live happily knowing your savior is still going to come, it's just it wasn't me."

Indow frowned and turned her head away from Louis. She never liked it when he talked about the idea that he might not be the Linkara. She remembered the horrible thing she had to do in which to save his life, and if it had been in vain... Well, needless to say, she didn't want to live with the idea that she had had sex with the enemy for no good reason. She sighed, wondering why she felt such... impure feelings. She was constantly attracted to males, and yes, sometimes even females. She never understood why she was like this. Yes, most girls did start marrying men at eleven kiros, but she was supposed to be a Linkaran Priestess, one of pure thought and body. Indow realized that if her father ever found out about her activities outside the church, he could do more than just ban her from entering another Linkaran church, she could be thrown out of the entire Linkaran Faith itself.

And so, she just had to request to Louis that he not tell her father of her 'activities' at the Inn.

Lithmenar, on the other hand, couldn't be happier at the moment. He slipped aside from the group briefly once or twice to pickpocket the people that stared in stunned silence at Louis, who continued to walk quickly through the middle of the street in his plaid flannel shirt, jeans, and T-shirt. Most of the people there had never even seen the patterns and colors that were so extravagantly shown on Louis' shirt, and the concept of jeans seemed absolutely mind-boggling. And because of this, Lithmenar easily got several coin purses, necklaces, and other objects easily stolen for a thief of his qualifications.

The castle was just as beautiful as the church, except the castle was made of white stones instead of the gray marble that Louis had spotted at the church. There was a large staircase leading up to the main gate, which had two knights in heavy silver armor protecting it. They each held a large broadsword and kite shield in their arms, both shields showing a different crest upon them. They narrowed their eyes as they saw Louis approach, and tightened their grips on their weapons.

Louis walked right up to the guard on the left and looked up at him, his own eyes narrow and filled with a fire Indow had not seen before. He said one thing: "Take me to the King. NOW."

The guard raised an eyebrow in confusion and said, "Excuse me?"

"You heard me. You are going to stand away from these doors and allow my companions and I entry into this castle." Louis replied.

Danlor gulped and winced, stepping back. Lithmenar merely chuckled and stood next to Indow, who was biting her lower lip, not as nervous as Danlor, but still concerned for Louis. The Guard growled silently back at Louis.

"Go away, child. I have no time for your games." The Guard responded.

Louis smirked, curving his mouth on one side. In a quick instant, the blade he had used so many times to kill Dark Knights slid out and Louis sliced straight down the kite shield. The Guard gasped and then backed off, aiming his weapon at Louis, who did the same. The other Guard prepared to join his compatriot should he need assistance.

"Very well," Louis said. "if you won't bring me to him, you can go inside and tell your King to get his fat, lazy ass out here or else I'm charging in there and ripping [sic] his fucking head off!"

The Guard glanced over at the other, who gave a nod. The Guard quickly entered into the Castle as the other Guard took the previous one's place. Louis smiled and backed off to the others, going down a step or two. Danlor was breathing heavily and shaking in nervousness.

"My lord, you could've killed that man! He is a protector of the light!" he exclaimed.

"And if the King really is working for the Darkness, then he's a servant of evil. Even then, I knew I wouldn't kill him. It's just I REALLY like to see the looks on their faces when they see a fourteen year-old do a move like that. Wait until I show them how I run up a wall, and I never needed any Linkaran shit for that." Louis said with a large smile.

Lithmenar was also smiling. "You're definitely not like I expected you to be, kid. I thought the Linkara would be this big fancy warrior who was totally indestructible. But you're just as frail as everyone else, and you speak odd words to us. Tell me, what does this 'fooking' mean?"

Louis chuckled. "Well, this 'fooking' is what we on my planet call a 'sentence enhancer.'"

Before he could continue, the first Guard returned from the castle gates with a new shield and his courage recovered. He walked up to Louis and the others and nodded.

"His majesty has decided to grant you entry into the castle and an audience before him." he stated.

Louis grinned and the Guard led the group inside. As they were walking through a main hallway, Louis spoke:

"You see? To quote Jason Carter, 'You can achieve more with a kind word and a two-by-four than you can with just a kind word.'"

"This Jason Carter seems like a very wise man." Lithmenar said.

"Indeed." Louis said with a smirk.

After that, no one spoke, examining the art all around them. For Danlor, it wasn't that big a deal, since he had been inside the castle several times. However, for the rest of them, it was as if they had stepped into the gates of paradise. White flames in candleholders lined the walls next to extravagant paintings of people unfamiliar to Louis. He assumed they were people who had previously sat in the throne in Ai. He even spotted a Dwarf, something that looked like an Elf from the Lord of the Rings trilogy, and two Catgirls. There were also large white doors, most likely leading into many rooms in the large and fancy castle.

At the end of the hallway was one final archway, which the group entered. This room was heavily lit, consisting of one window to the side that was made of glass and several candles with white flames. The room was filled with people, many of them wearing brightly colored garments or metallic jewelry. In the middle of it all was a high-risen throne with a tall man sitting upon it. His robes were a valiant purple, with bits of white showing underneath. He had a thin black beard, and several golden jewels adorning his chest and head. Two guards stood at either side of him.

Since Louis was the first to enter, the King's gaze immediately fell to him. Louis looked up at him with strength and courage in his eyes, much to the curiosity of the King. It was generally a custom to look upon the King with honor and respect, but Louis was acting as if he wasn't even a citizen of Ai.

"If I am not mistaken," the King spoke, his voice deep and commanding. "you are the one who most rudely demanded an audience with me, and the one who used words and language in an odd way. I demand to know what is so important that you had to interrupt my entertainment of my guests."

Louis took a deep breathe and stood straight and tall. "I am the Linkara that was prophesized in the Linkaran religion."

Louis fought the urge to smirk proudly. Immediately, the room was filled with loud whispers of all the people in the room talking and wondering if this boy really was who he said he was, or saying that little boys shouldn't lie like that. The King merely raised an eyebrow, taking in this new information, then stroked his beard. He then held up his left arm, and the entire room was silenced. The King brought his hand down again, then spoke:

"I refuse to accept that answer. I personally do not believe in the Linkaran faith, nor in their prophecies." The King stated.

"You do not have to believe in me, I am fact. My very existence before you proves that. According to the prophecies, a boy of fourteen 'kiros' shall appear in clothes in a pattern totally new to those on your world. As you can see, the flannel shirt I wear is in a pattern or texture common to my land known as 'plaid.' Also, I posses one of the sacred armor pieces that the prophecies that are housed in this very city tell of." Louis said, holding up the gauntlet on his hand.

There was some more murmuring among the crowd before the King silenced them once more. Before he could speak again, a new voice was added to the mix.

"Bah! Your majesty, I implore you to not believe in this child. The Linkaran faith is made up of a bunch of fools running around in white robes claiming their savior is coming. I would like to suggest to all here that this boy is nothing more than a farm boy who was taken from his home in the country and made up to look like the Linkara just so the Linkaran Church could overthrow your royalty!" the voice said.

Louis looked around, trying to discern where the voice was coming from. "Who dares challenge me and speaks such blasphemy of the church?!"

Out of the shadows next to the throne came a man with a beard and moustache that reminded Louis of the stereotypical appearance of a Frenchmen. He wore thin armoring around his body, made up of some type of leather/steel hybrid, and had a long sword at his side. When he had spoken before, he had a certain accent to him, as if he wasn't from Ai. Louis balled up fists and narrowed his eyes at the newcomer.

"I do, child. I am Läk Van Ûru, Son of Orthuk, heir to the Ramata Clan, and Champion of the King of Ai." The man said.

Louis smiled. "You know, with a title like that, people are going to think of you as quite egotistical. And I can just imagine your business cards must be a bitch to write out."

The Champion raised an eyebrow, confused by Louis' words. "I know not what you say, boy, but I do know you are NOT the Linkara."

"Oh, really? Your majesty, I have come to speak to you, not one of your flunkies." Louis shouted.

"Speak now, child." The King replied.

"Thank you. As you are aware, a military force consisting of Knights who dress in black armor have invaded parts of Jilad and Ünaré. They have now begun pushing north towards this beautiful country of yours. And what have you done to protect Ai from them? Nothing. In fact, I've seen military positions that indicate you're actually marching your defenses away from the center of your borders! This is openly inviting the Dark Knights to invade Ai and kill us all! I ask, no, I DEMAND an explanation for these actions!"

"Your majesty, I implore you to ignore this-" The Champion began.

"Excuse me," Louis interrupted. "But last time I checked, it was the King who was in charge of this country! Do you sit on that throne? Do you command a vast army? If not, then shut the fuck up and let me talk to the King, okay asshole?"

The Champion merely stood in awed silence at Louis. The King, on the other hand, smiled as he watched the petty bickering between the two. He then stood up, eliciting the attention of all those in the room. He looked at every face in the room, then put his arms up.

"Very well, child. If you are who you claim to be, you must be a great warrior. Being so, I challenge you to face my Champion in honorable combat! If you succeed, I will believe you are the Linkara and continue with the tradition of this noble Kingdom. Should you fail, you shall be banished from this land forever! Do you accept?" The King proclaimed.

Louis grinned and looked at the Champion. "Gladly."

Poster's RamblingsShow

Spoiler alert: Linkara is back to his insufferable self.

Do you include the bits where the characters are talking to each other? That ought to confuse Indow a lot.

"SINGING! It feels great to sing, Indow! Look all around us, the world is bright and exciting, and we're only a few minutes away with the horses walking from Walsz, our destination!" Louis exclaimed.

What a smooth way to crowbar exposition into the narrative.

They had run into a small band of Orcs, but by working as a team, Indow's magicks and Louis' ability to kick things in the crotch, they had easily disposed of the opposition to their advance towards Walsz.

Glad to here that you're just gonna skip entire fight scenes now. And are you seriously denying us the effect of groin kicks on orcs?

Oh, and we get confirmation that it is indeed okay to kill orcs:

"Orcs are backup soldiers for the Darkness." Indow had said. "The Dark Knights are always the first line of defense and attack for it. The Orcs are mainly laborers and cannon fodder."

Shouldn't the cannon fodder be the first line of defense and attack? And what are the odds that we will never see Dork Knights and orcs working together?

"My lord, why have we stopped?" Indow asked.

"Because," Louis explained. "we're being followed.

Wouldn't it be wiser to say this while you keep on moving? 'Cause now you've robbed your two-man party of an element of surprise.

"Well, I guess you caught me, then." said a voice that came from nearby bushes behind the two.

I don't think it's easy keeping up with horses while your are sneaking through shrubbery.
It's probably even harder to do that while staying within earshot.

And great, it's Lithmenar, the teenager thief with the stupid name. I guess he does stick around. Wonderful.

"You're that man who tried to steal my lord's gauntlet!" she exclaimed.

"Hey! I was only examining it to give him an advisement for prices-"

But before Lithmenar could finish what he was saying, Louis leapt off his horse and held the blade to his throat. Lithmenar froze, gulping as he looked down into the eyes of his captor.

"You," Louis said. "tried to steal my gauntlet?"

Lithmenar gulped once more, rasping out, "Yes, sir!"

Louis smiled and released Lithmenar's throat. "Okay, just wanted to know that. Now why are you following us?"

"Hey, this guy tried to steal your gauntlet!"
"I sure did try to steal his gauntlet!"
"*snikt* You tried to steal my gauntlet?"

Haven't you been listening? Or do you just love to scare people for fun?

Lithmenar decided to follow the messiah for fun and profit, and the messiah is A-OK with that.

"As a thief, this man probably has skills that can be of value to us. Pick pocketing, good eavesdropping skills, financial and political connections within a few governments. Some people that may owe him a favor or two." Louis explained.

I like how he doesn't mention his skills for sneaking.
And what "financial and political connections" could he possibly have with "a few governments"? He's a dumb kid who picks pockets.
He's never gonna do anything useful, is he?

*

Once more, Louis was reminded of his trip to France.

That first time was him bitching about a restaurant's menu being posted at the entrance, btw.
So yeah, The capital of Ai is basically Medieval France, or probably any kind of Medieval Europe.

... there was not one person along the streets that appeared as though they were unhappy or depressed.

The drugs must be pretty good around here.

Despite his heavy swearing and disgruntled nature towards certain stimuli, Louis always considered himself a 'nice guy.'

No comment.

Despite his happiness, Louis made sure to keep a close watch on Lithmenar. Louis had a trusting nature, but he knew not to turn your back on someone you just met.

He's a thief who tried to steal your shit.

Indow certainly doesn't trust him. I wonder if more happened at the Inn than she let on...

See my previous comment.

In an incredible feet [sic] of metallurgy for the era they were in, the church itself was made of a mixture of stone and marble bricks

• Will you ever specify which ere this resembles?
• That's not what metallurgy does

Apparently, someone knew the rough time of their arrival.

Louis was still smiling, but raised an eyebrow in surprise. "You were expecting us?"

"Oh, yes! Word travels fast between churches, my lord."

So I guess they have carrier pigeons. Or Palantir.

*

Louis was still smiling, but raised an eyebrow in surprise. "You were expecting us?"

"Oh, yes! Word travels fast between churches, my lord.

Danlor is probably the priest guy that welcomed them. He never gets a formal introduction, and this name has never popped up before in this book.

Danlor stared at Louis in disbelief. "But- but that's not possible! The King may have some objections to the Linkaran faith, but he'd never go as far as to betray this country to the Darkness!"

"It seems he has, High Priest. When the Linkara was discovered in the Sorceress Rain Vendre's cottage, the Dark Knights stated that they were sent on the authority of the King of Ai." Indow explained.

Danlor sat back in his chair, utterly amazed by this. However, he then winced and shook his head. "Well, the King has been acting strangely lately..."

"The king would never betray us!"
"But what about this (which we don't actually have any proof of)?!"
"Oh, I guess this could explain a thing or two..."

Turns out there have been tons of rumors of the border to the Darkness that totally sounds like the king has betrayed them, and he even imprisons anyone who gets to curious.
This is the worst betrayal ever.

But first, the next bit of the prophecy.

"This one's different from the last one." Louis stated, examining the text.

Danlor nodded. "Yes, it is written in a different language. To symbolize the union of all people on Sin, each verse is written in a different language. Some of the scrolls are written in languages none have been able to translate just yet. We've mostly translated this one, if you'd like to read it."

Jesus Fucking Christ. Can this religion get any dumber?!

"No need, I can still read it. 'Only the Chat-Najil can fight the darkness' influence and pure, blinding evil. There shall be one uniquely gifted to wield Chat-Najil.' What's Chat-Najil?" Louis asked.

Danlor winced and replied, "You know, we really don't know. It's the only word in this entire text that we can't translate."

• That's a stupid name
• You're the guy with Babel fish reading powers. Shouldn't you have a rough idea what these words mean?

We basically just get the "The Linkara is some 14-year-old dipshit who acts and talks like a lunatic" bit of the prophecy. Not sure if the "Know one other thing of him: he shall not know of his mission when he is revealed unto thee" part has been brought up before, though.

"Oh, what's this? 'His Chat-Najil shall come in the form of a golden metal shaped into an armor. Angels themselves, bringing with them the power to fight the demons of evil, shall imbue this armor. His Chat-Najil shall shape the armor, make it grow. The armor is an extension of the one who can wield the Chat-Najil. Each part is a segment of his spirit. The Gauntlets of Bravery and Determination. The Greaves of Swiftness. The Hauberk of Valor. The Helmet of Self-Sacrifice.' Oh, SWEET!" Louis exclaimed.

These names are cringe. Also apparently this does work like the armor from Rayearth.
Won't stop me from making more Saint Seiya jokes, though.

Lithmenar asked, "What is it, Linkster?"

You're shtick is gonna be Linkara's buddy who finds his antics kewl and radical, isn't it?

"If I understand this correctly, the Gauntlet that I wear will sometime later grow into a full-blown armor! Heh, no more crotch-kicking for Dark Knights, it'll just be plain old blade to blade!" Louis said, grinning widely.

Why? Your crotch-kicking has worked spendidly so far. Also your last "blade to blade" required magical support because you're a fucking idiot.

*

Louis, continuing to storm through the streets with the rest of the group close behind him, responded, "And if I am who you all seem to think I am, then I don't die just yet. I have to destroy this Darkness of yours, first. And if I'm not the Linkara, then I die and you can live happily knowing your savior is still going to come, it's just it wasn't me."

"I can't die doing stupid shit when I'm the messiah."

Indow frowned and turned her head away from Louis. She never liked it when he talked about the idea that he might not be the Linkara. She remembered the horrible thing she had to do in which to save his life, and if it had been in vain... Well, needless to say, she didn't want to live with the idea that she had had sex with the enemy for no good reason. She sighed, wondering why she felt such... impure feelings. She was constantly attracted to males, and yes, sometimes even females.

Great, if she's not having sex, she's thinking about the sex she had.

She never understood why she was like this. Yes, most girls did start marrying men at eleven kiros, but she was supposed to be a Linkaran Priestess, one of pure thought and body.

Lithmenar, on the other hand, couldn't be happier at the moment. He slipped aside from the group briefly once or twice to pickpocket the people that stared in stunned silence at Louis

Boy, I sure wonder if they'll ever get into trouble beacuse of this dipshit. Is Linkara gonna wave is blade around to defend Lithmenar's honor, should he ever get caught?

There was a large staircase leading up to the main gate, which had two knights in heavy silver armor protecting it. They each held a large broadsword and kite shield in their arms, both shields showing a different crest upon them.

Any interest in elaborating on the crests? What do they look like? Are they those knights' personal heraldry or something?

Time for 'nice guy' Linkara to bust out his Diplomacy skill:

"Take me to the King. NOW."

The guard raised an eyebrow in confusion and said, "Excuse me?"

"You heard me. You are going to stand away from these doors and allow my companions and I entry into this castle." Louis replied.

That's a good way to get turned into a pincushion by the royal archers.

Louis smirked, curving his mouth on one side. In a quick instant, the blade he had used so many times to kill Dark Knights slid out and Louis sliced straight down the kite shield. The Guard gasped and then backed off, aiming his weapon at Louis, who did the same. The other Guard prepared to join his compatriot should he need assistance.

"Very well," Louis said. "if you won't bring me to him, you can go inside and tell your King to get his fat, lazy ass out here or else I'm charging in there and ripping [sic] his fucking head off!"

"Bring me your king or I WILL FUCKING MURDER HIM!"


Luckily Linkara's DM never moves an inch off of his railroad plot, so the guards are charmed by his eloquence and decide to grant him an audience with the king.

"My lord, you could've killed that man! He is a protector of the light!" he exclaimed.

"And if the King really is working for the Darkness, then he's a servant of evil."

Never buy into "I was only following orders!". Especially when the orders wheren't actually evil.

"It's just I REALLY like to see the looks on their faces when they see a fourteen year-old do a move like that. Wait until I show them how I run up a wall, and I never needed any Linkaran shit for that." Louis said with a large smile.

I think he's a sociopath.

Lithmenar was also smiling.

Fuck you, you worthless fanboy.

"You see? To quote Jason Carter, 'You can achieve more with a kind word and a two-by-four than you can with just a kind word.'"

"This Jason Carter seems like a very wise man." Lithmenar said.

I think that's some British actor?
Also why does Lithmenar know what a "two-by-four" is?

White flames in candleholders lined the walls next to extravagant paintings of people unfamiliar to Louis. He assumed they were people who had previously sat in the throne in Ai. He even spotted a Dwarf, something that looked like an Elf from the Lord of the Rings trilogy, and two Catgirls.

Getting dangerously Clinean in here.

The room was filled with people, many of them wearing brightly colored garments or metallic jewelry.

I like the implication that the people with the jewelry are naked.

Since Louis was the first to enter, the King's gaze immediately fell to him. Louis looked up at him with strength and courage in his eyes, much to the curiosity of the King. It was generally a custom to look upon the King with honor and respect, but Louis was acting as if he wasn't even a citizen of Ai.

WTF does this mean?

Some boring back-and-forth between Linkara and King, until the villain for this chapter arrives:

"Bah! Your majesty, I implore you to not believe in this child. The Linkaran faith is made up of a bunch of fools running around in white robes claiming their savior is coming. I would like to suggest to all here that this boy is nothing more than a farm boy who was taken from his home in the country and made up to look like the Linkara just so the Linkaran Church could overthrow your royalty!" the voice said.

Louis looked around, trying to discern where the voice was coming from. "Who dares challenge me and speaks such blasphemy of the church?!"

That's a lot of words before you start wondering where they come from.

Out of the shadows next to the throne came a man with a beard and moustache that reminded Louis of the stereotypical appearance of a Frenchmen.

You just know this guy is evil.

He wore thin armoring around his body, made up of some type of leather/steel hybrid.

Dafuq is that supposed to be? A brigandine?

"I do, child. I am Läk Van Ûru, Son of Orthuk, heir to the Ramata Clan, and Champion of the King of Ai." The man said.

These names sound like they're from at least three different languages.

Louis smiled. "You know, with a title like that, people are going to think of you as quite egotistical. And I can just imagine your business cards must be a bitch to write out."

Heaven forbid some noble say out his full title at court.

The Champion raised an eyebrow, confused by Louis' words. "I know not what you say, boy, but I do know you are NOT the Linkara."

"Oh, really? Your majesty, I have come to speak to you, not one of your flunkies." Louis shouted.

Linkara sure takes it well if you don't believe his delusions.

"I've seen military positions that indicate you're actually marching your defenses away from the center of your borders! This is openly inviting the Dark Knights to invade Ai and kill us all! I ask, no, I DEMAND an explanation for these actions!"

Must be a weird invasion if these knights can just casually frequent the local inns.

I've seen military positions that indicate you're actually marching your defenses away from the center of your borders! This is openly inviting the Dark Knights to invade Ai and kill us all! I ask, no, I DEMAND an explanation for these actions!"


"Excuse me," Louis interrupted. "But last time I checked, it was the King who was in charge of this country! Do you sit on that throne? Do you command a vast army? If not, then shut the fuck up and let me talk to the King, okay asshole?"

No reason to be so pissy. "Imploring" is really just a fancier way of "begging" for something.

"Very well, child. If you are who you claim to be, you must be a great warrior. Being so, I challenge you to face my Champion in honorable combat! If you succeed, I will believe you are the Linkara and continue with the tradition of this noble Kingdom. Should you fail, you shall be banished from this land forever!"

Of course, instead of explaining himself or telling Linkara to GTFO of his castle, he just declares a duel between Linkara and Designated Bad Guy. I guess he wants them to release their sexual tension.

Next Time: King's Test II - Romancing the Catgirl