Spoony the Pussy One: Life is in the Render Queue

[Vaporwear]

His family will pay it.

This is what I'm betting on. Either fans or family will funnel him money in the 11th hour.

I doubt it. If his family was already paying for anything the house wouldn’t have gone into foreclosure in the first place. I can’t see any of them, even his parents, helping him if they weren’t aware that shit had hit the fan this badly. I know they’re well off, but I doubt any of them are well off enough to just outright pay off the tens of thousands that he owes at this point. Considering the circumstances it seems like for most part he’s on his own here and his best bet will be to move in with Miles. The question is whether or not he’ll try to drag out the foreclosure or let the process get carried out unimpeded.

[Tony Schiavone]

Someone is funneling him the money.
His Patreon is down to 104 members but still at $340 a month.

Granted, that money buys him less and less over the years. And his socialblade numbers-- even at their MOST generous--are still poverty level.
But the man hasnt even had a website on over a year. How new people could find him and watch his videos is a mystery.

>cataloguing random Spoony sycophants

Gladly.

SpoilerShow

With a whopping one follower.

An out of touch kaleidoscope coyote. Does Youtube vids that are, of course, about Dorgan Ball games.

This one does her own Twitch streams that no one likes, or seems to watch.

Poor man doesnt know the rules about being Spoony's reminder calendar.
And I sat 'man' loosely. Doesnt bother to update his Twitter in years, but posts regular MTG videos for less than 20 people.
Probably relying on algorithm mistakes.

Speaking of mistakes, that beard:

>What is Best to an hero

None of these people ever go out useful.
At the very least: print out the public list of addresses of registered sex offenders, grab your weapon, and get to work. You might redeem yourself and get off easier in jail when they find out you been keeping they daughters safe.

Comb the ghettos for drug dealers. Go off on a one-way mission to Mexico. You want to die so bad; you'll get there.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

I doubt it. If his family was already paying for anything the house wouldn’t have gone into foreclosure in the first place.

This. And what good will bailing him out now have? All he'd take away from this is "Problems do go away on their own if I ignore them long enough".

[jpakke]

About youtubers and making it their "career"...I remember watching some video from some youtuber who quit his real job and made "youtubing" into his fulltime job, he didn't say it straight but reading between the lines he clearly regretted the decision as it became much more as a job than fun side gig on the side. It also fucks up your life because it easily starts to encompass your whole life.

[veris leta facies]

This was actually quite OK review. He never should've evovle anywhere from that style. No skits, no over-the-top hyperventilation, and there is also absolutely NO need for a better camera for shit like this.

[Vaporwear]

I doubt it. If his family was already paying for anything the house wouldn’t have gone into foreclosure in the first place.

This. And what good will bailing him out now have? All he'd take away from this is "Problems do go away on their own if I ignore them long enough".

More importantly and in practical terms, if they have to bail him out now, that would mean they would have to keep bailing him out for decades. I used to wonder if his parents or siblings were helping him out but it’s clear that they never contributed significantly to paying his mortgage if at all, the dude just used a combination of his Patreon earnings and whatever savings his ex Scarlett forced him to put into the savings plan she set up for him. For a long time he was making more than 5k a month off Patreon earnings alone, and that’s not even including income from YouTube and Blip. He could’ve easily covered the mortgage back then and had plenty left over, until the jig was up and most people caught on to his scamming. For years he was probably just coasting on his diminishing Patreon funds and savings along with whatever little money rApril was making until he finally ran out of money, which I assume was sometime in 2019.

This also demonstrates how much of a failure-to-launch manchild he is. Every step of his life he had someone else to do the heavy lifting for him in terms of his finances. His parents, Miles, Scarlett, it’s clear he always needed someone else to do that shit for him because he was too much of a coddled little shit to handle those most basic of adult responsibilities. rApril was nothing more than a low-key gold digger who was living in her own fairytale fantasy world of Tim Burton wannabe elves and BDSM-lite sex fetishes, so of course she wasn’t up to the task of keeping Antwhiler focused on making money, instead he got complacent. He didn’t have to work anymore so he didn’t, and no one with a back bone was around to make him do anything.

He’s the ultimately expression of the millennial mindset, that he shouldn’t have to work because he’s Noah Antwhiler “The Avatar and King of Tekken”, and that means something just because. He’s special just because and everyone should treat him as such, and his pain is special and brutally terrible even though in his entire life he hasn’t faced a single hardship. The fucker hasn’t known a single day without a full stomach and probably never will, but his suffering is unbelievable, especially after his “girlfriend” dumped him.

I blame the parents. Clearly they had him when they were too old so they didn’t raise him right, enabled his worst tendencies, never taught him the value of hard work(real work, not that bullshit Internet reviewing shit they let him do), paid his way through college, let him get some bullshit degree, and then let him stay in his room playing video games into his late 20s instead of kicking his ass out for not holding down a real job. So he became the blubbering pussy that we know now.

And now Miles has to deal with this shit. I really do hope he shoots his big bro in the back of the head “Of Mice and Men” style, does a cover up, and then takes good care of the dog.

[Vaporwear]

The alternatives -- that he "worked" and saved tens of thousands of dollars, which doesn't seem like the same type of character who would then blow it on a 4 bedroom house for 2 people and a dog -- don't make any more sense. He'd blow it on pornographic 20 sided dice and slurpees. If he saved it from Blip payments, same thing -- he would have blown it. Look at Noah Antwiler -- does this seem like a guy who EVER had a thought about planning for the future?

Eh Antwhiler isn’t DSP, he didn’t spend his money on expensive cars, multiple homes and a bunch of weird useless shit the minute it came in. The car he had before he crashed it was some old junker that probably wasn’t worth the car insurance payments, which were also most likely very low. Yeah he probably bought some D&D nonsense and other nerd shit but that would amount to what, a couple hundred bucks every few months at best before he realized most of that shit he could get just by putting it on his Amazon wishlist? In terms of housing he mostly lived with his parents and then his brother, who I doubt forced him to pay much in the way of rent.

Aside from some nerd shit it looks like he lived a pretty frugal life so I can see him easily accruing a decent amount of savings that he needlessly spent on a stupidly big house because April wanted it. It’s the fucking pussy, he let it get to his head, just like DSP and other INs who tried to use money to hold on to some pussy.

[Kugelfisch]

Him being resourceful is just about the only positive aspect of him. Phil has to eat at a restaurant every other day but Noah could and does get by on a pack of ramen and a third of vodka a day.

[Guest]

Was poking around to see if Noah was being sued by anyone else (pretty rare people default on a mortage without defaulting on a bunch of other shit first). That doesn't seem to be the case yet, because Spoony dares to be different (and stupid), but I did manage to dig up some info about the foreclosure case.

He paid $230k for the house. He paid $35k down and had a mortgage for the remaining $195k.

It's a 30 year mortgage at 3.75% interest, which comes out to about a $750/month mortgage payment.

He still has a balance due of $177,039. So he's wiped about $18k off the principle in 4 years.

He pays about $7.2k a year in property taxes. If you're counting at home, that means his property tax on a monthly basis is only $150 less than his mortgage.

With the mortgage rate, his monthly burn for the property is about $1.4k.

This was a few pages back.

That was dumb. Maybe he was hoping Dad would pop off and leave him some money before he got evicted. If April made $1000 a month she was probably footing most of the bill, while lazy ass Antwiler couldn't be bothered to get a part time shift at the local movie theater.

[Tony Schiavone]

Spoony remains the lone exception, though. At any point during the height of his earnings, he could have done any level of effort and still retained whatever percentage if his income and notoriety.
The rest of DHI is filled with these examples, differing only from Spoony in where they detoured to remain some kind of 'stable.'


Not Noah. He deliberately points his nose straight down in free fall at every single opportunity. There is some kind of scientific value to this Experiment because no regulation board would ever approve of a human trial doing this to themselves.

Instead we can see exactly what the baseline free fall of someone like him and revise the numbers.