Pat the NES Cunt

Whine and Bitch about people long after they become interesting to talk about
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mad bum
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by mad bum » Thu Feb 27, 2020 8:44 pm

CIANigger wrote:
Thu Feb 27, 2020 8:38 pm
What's Akron looking like these days? Still derelict?
Crackron is of course still trash, they are trying to make these poor places "artsy" but its not doing shit.
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Salmonella
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Salmonella » Thu Feb 27, 2020 9:11 pm

Bitching because they have a shitty trade in policy is very short sighted. Bitching because they ask if you want to preorder anything is pretty much infantile. If you don't like what they'll offer you, just try to sell it yourself. Pretty much nowhere gives you shit for used games. Pretty much everywhere tries to hock their loyalty programs to you too. Gamestop is far from perfect the gaming world would be a much shittier place without them. It's just like Blockbuster where everyone claimed they hated them while they were around but now they all jerk off to the nostalgia since they're gone.

It's funny that Ian gets on his high horse over Gamestop when he works at the hipster version of one. If Gamestop goes down, your're probably next, dummy.

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by mad bum » Thu Feb 27, 2020 9:14 pm

Honesty a lot of the gamestops I've been at don't hassle me much unless you're looking around, but even that I guess is just trying to customer service. I did have one store a few years ago really try to upsell me and even print out sheets to compare games I liked or some shit.

And yeah don't ever sell your shit to them, UNLESS they are doing a good promo like they did last summer where they would give $5 more for each game over $5. I had a bunch of trash games that I couldn't of sold easily and gamestop took everything at ebay prices.
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by MegaNigger » Thu Feb 27, 2020 11:11 pm

mad bum wrote:
Thu Feb 27, 2020 8:44 pm
CIANigger wrote:
Thu Feb 27, 2020 8:38 pm
What's Akron looking like these days? Still derelict?
Crackron is of course still trash, they are trying to make these poor places "artsy" but its not doing shit.
My old band played at Musica near Interbelt and Annabells in Highland Square and I'd go up there a bunch for the surprisingly nice parks they have, but yeah, the streets were loaded with literal trash art and post modern bullshit with homeless sleeping on it even years ago. Things never change in Ohio.
-The user formerly known as CIANigger

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Thu Feb 27, 2020 11:46 pm

Salmonella wrote:
Thu Feb 27, 2020 6:45 pm


Why do these two faggots want Gamestop to fail so badly? It's not a perfect place, but it would without a doubt be a bad thing if they ceased to exist.
On the contrary, seeing those Jewish fucks fall would be an eternal blessing.

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Fri Feb 28, 2020 1:21 am

I will never have sympathy for a company that opens games then has the gall to sell them as new.

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Salmonella » Fri Feb 28, 2020 2:03 am

I never understood why they did that in the first place

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Kugelfisch » Tue Mar 03, 2020 10:02 am

Salmonella wrote:
Thu Feb 27, 2020 9:11 pm
It's funny that Ian gets on his high horse over Gamestop when he works at the hipster version of one.
That's the reason he's bitching about Gamestop in the first place. Dude thinks he's something special, being the underpaid "manager" for some shitty vidya store.
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by BobbyBoucher » Tue Mar 10, 2020 11:13 am

Another update for Pat "Is there a Witcher 3?" Contri.

The Not for Resale documentary was released, and someone actually pirated it, so here it is: It's actually pretty boring. You might want to watch it at 2x speed or something. Some of the game store owners were seen on various Game Chasers episodes. One of them could've gone on full disability, but instead chose to open a game store.

Also, Ian's in it, he looks like a hobo. Pat has a terrible haircut in certain clips. Pics down below.


Summary of all the shit they've said:
  • Pat "Pro-Union" Contri used PrintNinja, a Chinese printing company, to print his guidebook. No wonder he hates tariffs.
  • Pat thinks Japan has advanced technology because they have tunnels connecting their islands. "Japan is so far ahead of us."
  • Pat laughs at the Switch detractors since it sold 52 million, more than SNES.
    • (The Switch is matching other Nintendo portable consoles. They were pushed out of the set-top market.)
  • On the Academy Awards, they say they hear the right movie won.
    • (Clearly, they haven't watched Parasite.)
      • I have. It's trite and predictable, just like Bong's earlier movie, Snowpiercer.
  • They talk about Warcraft 3 Reforged debacle.
    • They shit-talk Blizzard, but will never admit defeat on Diablo Immortal.
      • (Diablo Immortal is supposed to enter open alpha this year.)
    • "I don't know how these things keep happening with Blizzard," says Pat. "Someone has to get fired over stuff like this.
  • Pat says video game movies only count if they take place in a video game universe.
    • Since the Sonic movie takes place on Earth, it doesn't count according to him.
  • Pat says The Lousiana Purchase was great and that France probably regrets it.
    • (It originally belonged to Spain, Napoleon was able to bullshit his way into selling it. He sold something he didn't really own.)
  • Pat does not like films/media that positively depicts Italian criminal organizations.
    • Did not watch Sopranos.
  • Consoomer Ian wants to buy the Animal Crossing Switch edition, but doesn't have the money for it (or health insurance).
    • Ian says his wife Vonnie plays the Switch every day. (They don't have children.)
    • Vonnie is a huge fan of Sonic. Has all the comics and cover variants, Has Memoriabilia.
  • Pat doesn't know anyone who has a Roku even though it is either the first or second best selling smart TV device.
  • Pat says he prefers RPGs without knights and Final Fantasy bullshit.
    • (He hasn't played Earthbound/Mother, Fallout, KOTOR, or Persona series of games from everything he's admitted.)
      • There's not much left. I doubt he played Infinite Space, Radiant Historia, Phantasy Star, Deus Ex, or Vagrant Story.
      • He's just not much of a gamer.
  • According to Pat, people regretted buying the NES guidebook and either tried to cancel the order or return it.
  • Pat says guy who shorted before housing crisis said to buy Gamestop stock.
    • Pat says the guy might be shorting.
      • (This would be highly illegal. Writing articles/recommendations about stocks requires a person to state if they own any and are short/long.)
        • Pat "Expert Businessman" Contri
  • On the Cooly Skunk dumped ROM topic, Pat said he's impressed someone went to a japanese game store and knew enough it was rare.
    • (It was Super Potato in Akihabara. Geeks/otaku go there all the time.)
      • Moreover, the store probably knew they had something rare. Pat thought it was underpriced at $500 and assumed they were ignorant.
  • Pat says gambling is his one vice.
  • Pat says he played Unreal Tournament at college on a "T1 LAN".
    • (It was probably a 10/100 Mbps. T1 is only 1.5 Mbps and used for ISPs.)
  • Pat echoes Scorsese and says we aren't hearing about small games, only the amusement park rides.
    • (Smaller games like Subnautica are talked about, but they need to have interesting concepts.)
      • I don't think they've ever mentioned Subnautica.
  • Pat says he once ended up in a Hooters-themed hotel in Vegas at 4 AM, but couldn't explain how he got there.
  • New York Times article on game speculation.
    • Pat says there was a rumor he sold his NWC Gold for $150k. False he says. (Too low for Pat.)
    • "You can always pay too much for things," says Pat. ($1.2 million sub-par house.)
    • Pat says he'd pay $5k for a low-grade Amazing Fantasy #15, but not $16k.
    • Pat says he's ethical because he's not promoting this scheme to pump up the market.
      • (The reality is Pat already owns some of the rarest gaming items around. He'll sell the commons, but keep stuff like the NWC gold cart.)
    • Pat says pumping and dumping a market was last seen in Bitcoin. (Pat runs ads for an altcoin podcast.)
  • Superbowl: Ian is upset at the native american team names/mascots. ("Chiefs" is probably the least offensive name of them all.)
  • Pat says he'll only get Disney+ once all the upcoming Marvel TV series are out.
    • (Pat said the movies have no emotional investment, why would he watch the TV series?)
  • Ian has to explain to Pat what the Wonderful 101 is and how well it sold on the Wii U.
  • On the Flashpoint game/emulator/service, Ian says it's highly important that they preserve the Flash porn games.
  • Pat says he hasn't seen a game releasd on Linux in years.
    • (There have been a bunch. Rocket League was on Linux until recently. Bunch of indies like FTL as well.)
  • Despite having never played the series, Pat says Assassin's Creed has been destroyed by greed.
    • He says all the gameplay is the same. (From what I've seen/played, there are differences.)
  • q&a what nintendo properties should be turned into movies/tv series
    • They don't realize there were already a bunch of animated series of Donkey Kong, F-Zero, Kirby.
    • Pat wants a $300 million Zelda movie. (Insane and excessive. Keep it around $100 million.)
  • Atari Amico announced a Founder's edition.
    • They say this is stealth crowdfunding. That it's used as market research.
      • They like that Polymega has open pre-orders.
    • (The sale occurred a month ago around January 26/27.)
      • According to Tommy Tallarico: 1,000 were sold in 5 minutes, 1500 in 15 minutes, 2000 in an hour. Sales cut off at 2600 at hour 6 or 7.
      • Pat never reported this.
      • Pat however says that couch multiplayer games are losing popularity and it doesn't bode well for the Amico.
        • Pat is a bitter, vindictive little man.
  • A Q&A of "Is Picard series too political" question.
    • It never won the Q&A vote, but was on the list for two weeks.
    • Pat and Ian effectively answered it because the very question seemed to annoy them.
    • Say that Star Trek was always political, gives example of half-white/half-black aliens fighting each other.
      • (It's gotten worse over the years.)
        • TOS: Uhura didn't know racism was a thing.
        • DS9: Ben Sisko experiences racism via the Prophets.
        • STD: "That's not who we are. Orange Man Bad."
    • Both say it was left wing political with free resources and no money. "It's always progressive."
      • (There were still limited resources such as dilithium. There definitely was trade.)
        • SFDebris pointed out stupidity of system when Jake needed money to buy a baseball card.
    • (If anyone cares Picard isn't as bad as Discovery. I don't know where "too political" is coming from.)

cu podcast 193:
SpoilerShow
  • 10 year anniversary of Pat going to CES/Vegas.
    • Pat has done 60 Punk episodes.
      • 1 in 2018 (one of the worst years in his life, he says)
      • 4 in 2019
  • CES 2020
    • they talk about CES from 10 years ago.
      • 3D TVs
        • Pat says they were terrible.
        • Pat was forced to see Iron Man 3 in 3D because that was the only one available. (Consoome)
      • Boxee Box - like Roku
      • Alienware UFO handheld PC
        • "Is there a Witcher 3?" Pat asks when discussing what games might play on this.
        • Ian brings up there are a lot of doubters for the Switch.
          • And that 360/PS3 eventually added motion controls, copying the Wii.
        • Pat says of course it runs hot since it doesn't have Chameleon Cooling. (Referring to Coleco Chameleon.)
        • Ian says he's been gaming on PC a lot recently, especially his laptop.
        • Pat says this would cost double an Nvidia Shield ($200).
          • (Ha, ha, ha, ha. No. More like triple.)
            • And that's with whatever GPU an embedded CPU has.
            • The equivalent cost gaming laptop will perform better.
            • Gaming laptops are already affordable. The UFO would be underpowered and cost more.
            • It might make more sense if it were an Android tablet using Steam link to connect a PC.
              • But there are controller and phone attachments that can do this already.
      • arcade 1-up releases new home arcade and pinball units
        • ian likes the propertary/custom controls on arcade machines (like yoke on Star Wars).
          • He also likes NBA Jam.
        • star wars arcade
          • pat says they can charge whatever they want and they'll sell out
        • "This is game changing" says Pat for some reason. "Especially the pinball ones."
  • mother 4 fangame renamed
    • Pat says Nintendo has a zero tolerance to this.
      • (They have to. Anything trademarked has to be defended or you lose the trademark.)
    • Pat has never played an Earthbound/Mother game. (Of course.)
    • Pat says he prefers RPGs without knights and Final Fantasy bullshit.
      • More unique, he says.
      • (He doesn't play them ever otherwise he'd talk about them.)
  • Amico Founders Edition
    • They say this is stealth crowdfunding.
      • It's being used as market research.
    • They wonder who is funding the Amico for its million dollar marketing campaign.
      • Pat suggests they are selling Founders Edition for cash to push marketing.
    • they mention polymega positively that it has open pre-orders unlike the Amico.
  • Super Star Wars for Genesis dumped/prototype
    • (the game is more interesting than their commentary)
  • refurbished NES and SNES classics
    • only $10 off
    • According to Pat, people regretted buying the NES guidebook and either tried to cancel the order or return it.
  • scumbag seller of the week.
    • Someone selling repro using donor boards.
      • Pat/Ian says you can just buy PCB boards designed for the purpose and flash them yourself.

cu podcast 194:
SpoilerShow
  • Ian finished up Witcher series.
    • Says it was fine. Will watch more of it.
  • Morbius movie
    • Pat says Sony is trying to imply it's part of MCU when it isn't.
    • Pat calls Morbius a C+ character.
    • Pat looking forward to new Batman.
    • Ian isn't looking to anything DC.
    • Someone told Pat a Back to the Future remake would be set in the 90s.
      • Reminds him he is old.
      • Says he couldn't live in 1955, but could in '85.
        • (A single weirdo like Pat would be shunned in '55.)
        • Ian dings Pat, says there were lots of video games for Pat to not play in '85.
  • Super Nintendo Land trailer
    • Ian not excited.
    • Pat says it's weird advertising moved to older people.
    • Pat upset at use of CG instead of real footage.
    • He also objects to use of word "collaborated" instead of "hired" for singers/musicians.
    • Pat felt nothing watching this.
  • jj games shuts down
    • Pat knows JJ guy.
    • email says casual buyers dried up, but big collectors still there.
      • also blames algorithm change by google.
      • good sales in 2017, but dried up after.
      • also claims NES sales stayed strong, but Genesis dried up with release of mini console.
    • comments/Ian says store charged too much (above Price Charting)
      • (Their site has Eternal darkness for $40 ($50 list), Price Charting is $30/$45 loose/CIB.)
  • xbox series x will drop exclusives
    • (I couldn't even really follow their conversation.)
    • Pat says this justifies his claim consoles now being computers.
    • Pat says this is good for Xbox.
    • Ian says it's bad because then there's no reason to buy it over a PS5 with exclusives.
    • The then argue about what's best and most profitable.
      • (Microsoft does have certain advantages since they own all versions of Windows.)
  • atari vcs at ces
    • they say it looks like crap and it's odd it's running Windows 10 in sandbox mode.
      • Pat tells Ian to be careful or he'll have someone from ReviewTechUSA after him.
    • Pat shows contempt for the people who pre-ordered it.
    • They then make obvious statements about the lack of games and so on.
  • retron jr
    • gb/gba emulator for TVs
    • Pat thinks there's a market for this.
    • Ian hates it. Says it looks like dogshit.
    • Pat wonders if there are any die hard Game Boy players out there.
      • (He better hope since he's making a book for them.)
    • Ian says it will support Link Cable and two can be hooked up.
  • q&a will PS5 backwards compatibility increase the popularity of old games?
    • Ian say yes.
      • Everytime Xbox 360/One added games to their compatibility list, people would go to store to buy them.
      • The online community would get a boost.
    • Pat thinks PS3 was released in 2007. Thinks 360 was 2006.
      • (He's off by one year for each.)
  • ian calls elon musk a "herb"
    • Pat is thankful he's popularizing electic cars.
    • Says we should've had them 30 years ago.
  • Ian is buying a pot for a succulent plant.
    • (Probably marijuana in reality.)
    • Pat says he had one at his condo, but somehow lost it.

cu 194 aftershow:
SpoilerShow
  • flex pro meals dropped pat as a sponsor
  • Pat complains about 3 minute mixxer signings. Says pro athletes don't do this.
  • Pat has a one strike rules for friends
  • 8:00 Pat says he'd make a good samurai.
  • Pat cucked himself in college, went out with a classmate with "big bajungas" but never made a move.
  • Pat has all the NES marathons.
  • ~14:00 Pat weighs 197 pounds. Says he's up from 180 lbs and it's muscle.
    • Then old man Pat talks about exercise and not recovering as fast as he used to.
  • ~21:00 Pat has no idea how much he can bench. He guesses 200 lbs.
  • Pat says he can't stream retro games because it'd be below minimum wage.
  • ~25:00 Pat says the Pacific ocean is colder than the Atlantic because water comes down from alaska. (He's talk about US coastline, not the entire ocean.)
    • Pat has never been in the Pacific near San Diego. Did go in when he visited his ex-girlfriend in Hawaii. (Calls her a "friend".)
  • 30:00 Pat surprised at raid during first Twitch marathon.
    • Thinks it was immature.
  • pat uses PrintNinja to print book
    • It's a printshop in China.
  • Pat discovers there are train tunnels connecting Japanese islands.
    • He then marvels at the "technology" they have and say the US doesn't have anything like it.
      • "Japan is so far ahead of us."
    • Says the US doesn't have one to Hawaii, but even he admits that's a long distance.
    • Someone reminds him the Chunnel exists.
  • 38:00 Pat says you can buy a mansion in Montana for $20.
    • Says he'll probably retire there, buy a ranch.
  • 43:00 Pat says Alaska was made a state to prevent Russians from invading.
    • Chat corrects him, says Russia sold it in 1800s. Pat responds saying they probably planned to invade in the '50s.
    • (Russia sold the land to the US because it thought Britain might seize it.)
  • Pat says The Lousiana Purchase was great and that France probably regrets it.
    • (It originally belonged to Spain, Napoleon was able to bullshit his way into selling it. He sold something he didn't own.)
      • It'd be Spain that's pissed.
    • "never sell land" says Pat.
  • Pat says native americans crossed the bering strait land bridge to North America.
    • (I believe the current model is that one group did that.)
      • However, another group went by boat along the coastline. They went down to Central/South America very quickly that way.
  • Pat does not like films/media that positively depicts Italian criminal organizations.
    • Did not watch Sopranos.
  • Pat likes the Irishman.
  • Pat says Punk is on hiatus. For monetary reasons.
  • Chat asks about prices for his collection. Pat says he's calculating it or something.

cu podcast 195:
SpoilerShow
  • Pat's been having vivid dreams.
    • Pat dreamed of playing poker. [Pat's been playing real life.]
      • He loses. Someone puts a porno on the TV.
      • He ends up in a hotel and finds an uzi on the ground. Picks it up. [Pat says he would've taken the clip out if it were real.]
      • A grandmother picks him up in a car.
      • Turns into a Sopranos episode. They wanted the uzi from him. He had to threaten them with a revolver and got out.
      • (Pat his clearly suppressing his Italian/mobster heritage.)
    • Ian dreamed that a hotel a hotel materialized in front of him. The inside looked liked Kowloon Walled City.
      • Someone in dream made him do drugs including ecstasy.
      • When he woke up, he felt like he actually was on ecstasy. (Must be a relapse.)
  • Smash Bros.
    • Byleth from Fire Emblem announced.
    • Ian says this is the 8th Fire Emblem character.
      • Pat thinks they are fighting wizards, demons, and dragons.
    • Ian thinks it's a blown opportunity.
      • Thinks it could've been a monster hunter character.
  • gamestop loses 25% of Q4 revenue
    • pat says guy who shorted before housing crisis said to buy Gamestop stock.
      • Pat says the guy might be shorting.
        • (This would be highly illegal. Writing articles about stocks requires a person to state if they own any and are short/long.)
  • cooly skunk game dumped
    • Pat said he's impressed someone went to a japanese game store and knew enough it was rare.
      • (This is pretty common. There's a dedicated base of Japanese and foreign game collectors searching this stuff out.)
        • It was found at Super Potato in Akihabara. The store and area are famous to geeks/nerds/otaku.
        • The store knew it had a rare game. The customers knew there'd be rare games inside. Pat's an idiot.
  • NHS warning about lootboxes and gambling.
    • ian doesn't like gambling
      • Pat says it's his one vice
    • Pat says the industry must self-regulate.
    • Pat also says companies don't give a shit and are out for the most money possible.
      • (Which means self-regulation is impossible. This isn't the ESRB with retailers refusing to carry ungraded products.)
        • The only two companies that can do anything are Apple and Google.
    • Pat never flew a kite as a kid. Pat always wanted to fly a stunt kite, but his father never bought him one.
      • Ian says they are expensive.
  • ninja (the streamer) skin in fortnite
    • Pat's shocked at price, but Ian reminds him it's a free game.
    • Then Ian talks about Rap Snacks and Rap Noodles. Doesn't want to go to Walmart to get Rap Ramen.
  • q&a favorite retro pc games
    • Ian says Doom II.
      • Says he's "not much of a gamer".
    • Ian likes X-COM games and point-and-click adventures (LucasArts, Sierra).
      • Pat loves Space Quest, likes Police Quest and Leisure Suit Larry.
    • Pat likes the early Star Wars games like TIE Fighter.
      • Pat likes Dark Forces "pre-Jedi crap". Says it's not Star Wars since it's "too adult".
      • (He never played KOTOR, from what I can tell.)
    • Pat says he played Unreal Tournament at college on a "T1 LAN".
      • (If he was playing local multiplayer, it was probably 10/100 Mbps. T1 is/was generally for ISP connections. It was only 1.5 Mbps.)

cu podcast 196:
SpoilerShow
  • ian plays games
    • Ring Fit Adventure
      • Doing squats 40 times in a row or something.
    • WarSim - text-based war game.
      • Pat says text-based is "easier to program". (It's not.)
      • Pat echoes Scorsese and says we aren't hearing about small games, only the amusement park rides.
        • (Smaller games like Subnautica are talked about, but they need to have interesting concepts.)
    • wreckfest
      • Ian only heard about it last week. (It's been out for years.)
  • Atari Hotels
    • TLDR Atari licensed name/IP for $600k and 5% of revenue of hotels in several locations.
    • Pat and Ian say gimmick hotels could work in Vegas, but not everywhere else.
      • Pat says he once ended up in a Hooters-themed hotel in Vegas at 4 AM, but couldn't explain how he got there.
    • Mention that Atari Gameband was cancelled.
    • They talk more about VCS having no direction.
  • reggie interview
    • They discuss immature marketing.
      • Pat says Play It Loud era was when Nintendo hemmoraged market share to sony. (Wikipedia says Sega.)
  • NYT game speculation.
    • Pat says there was a rumor he sold his NWC Gold for $150k. False he says. (Too low for Pat.)
    • "You can always pay too much for things," says Pat. ($1.2 million sub-par house.)
    • Pat says he'd pay $5k for a low-grade Amazing Fantasy #15, but not $16k.
      • (Anyone who even considers $5k for a comic book has too much money on their hands.)
      • Ian is too cheap to buy GTA 5 even on sale.
    • They say all rare comics are now in investors hands.
      • (A few are in Hollywood actors/directors hands.)
        • The 1% consumers. There are few, if any, in gaming.
    • Pat says he's ethical because he's not promoting this scheme to pump up the market.
      • (The reality is Pat already owns some of the rarest gaming items around.)
        • He'll sell the common stuff before the market implodes, but he'll hold onto the gold NWC cart and other items that will only appreciate.
    • Pat didn't know about Dr. Right/Wily thing in Mega Man or box differences in Rad Racer.
    • 2 of the 5 people who bought the sealed mario are invested in Wata games.
    • Pat says pumping and dumping a market was last seen in Bitcoin.
      • (Ethical podcaster Pat runs ads for something called Altcoin Sidekick, which is apparently a cryptocurrency podcast.)
  • $168k baseball tom brady rookie card traded for NWC cart.
    • Pat says it destroys the value of the card since the NWC last sold for $26k.
    • Pat considers himself ethical for not getting his NWC Gold graded and pumping the market.
  • Arwings in Ocarina of Time
    • Pat considers the people who do arbitrary code executions wizards.
    • Pat mentions Flappy Bird in Super Mario world.
      • Calls these people brilliant.
  • scumbag seller of the week
    • Vending machine in California mall selling bootleg GameBoy games.
    • Pat says overcharging. $20 for a $1 game off AliExpress.
  • q&a what video game world would you like to be trapped in?
    • Ian says most RPG worlds are dangerous or facing the apocalypse.
      • So he chooses the Mushroom Kingdom.
        • Pat says they have a socialist system because free coins are everywhere.
    • Pat chooses Harvest Moon even though he hasn't played the series.
    • Ian also says Pokemon since nobody dies in it.

cu podcast 197:
SpoilerShow
  • super bowl
    • Ian is upset at the native american team names/mascots. ("Chiefs" is probably the least offensive name of them all.)
    • Pat talks about the commercials. He watched the game with Frank.
    • Pat says he'll only get Disney+ once all the upcoming Marvel TV series are out.
  • wonderful 101 kickstarter
    • Ian has to explain to Pat what the Wonderful 101 is and how well it sold on the Wii U.
    • Due to all the ports, the Wii U will be a lost system, says Pat.
    • Chris Kohler wrote an article about what Wii U games should be ported.
    • They talk about multiplayer games not being as popular anymore.
      • Pat snidely references the Amico by saying "it may not bode well for a certain console."
  • animal crossing switch.
    • Consoomer Ian complains that islands are locked to a particular Switch unit.
      • Buying a second copy won't give a new island.
    • Ian wants to buy the Animal Crossing Switch edition, but doesn't have the money for it (or health insurance).
  • Switch sells 52 million.
    • Pat says this is more than SNES.
      • (While true, SNES had 50% market share or more.)
    • Pat predicted a success, so now takes swings at "faggots and experts" who doubted the Switch.
      • (Pat now hates experts, I guess.)
    • Pat says it did well even against stiff competition from mobile, PC, Xbox, PS4.
      • (You could argue Nintendo was pushed out of traditional consoles. It was forced to rely on its traditional handheld console domination.)
        • In that case, it should be compared to sales numbers for Nintendo's portable systems.
          • GB: 118 million.
          • GBA: 81 million.
          • DS: 154 million.
          • 3DS: 75 million.
        • In short, Nintendo's doing better because it's operating in a niche with little effective competition (Sony abandoned handhelds, cell phone games are garbage).
          • It actually seems to be selling better than their handhelds. So it's probably a result of combining their handheld buyers with their set-top buyers. Pent up demand is another factor.
    • They say the Switch has a couple years left before a new more powerful model should be introduced.
    • Consoomer Ian says his wife Vonnie plays the Switch every day.
      • (Do Ian and Vonnie each have a Switch?)
    • Pat sees Switch Lite as secondary console for "real portability".
  • [Stamps.com ad read]
    • Pat claims he's saved over $1,000 using it over 6-7 years.
  • more blizzard/Warcraft 3.
    • They mention the Immortal, censorship on behalf of China, and Overwatch 2 incidents.
    • Pat mentions that no one talks about Unreal Tournament 2003 and 2007.
    • "They're making a Diablo 4?!" Pat asks sarcastically.
      • (Immortal was announced over a year ago. "Alpha coming out this year.")
        • Blizzard is incompetent. Bethesda launched Fallout Shelter day of announcement.
    • Ian was interested in Diablo 2 remaster until Warcraft 3 Reforged came out.
    • Ian lists the litany of problems with Reforged.
      • Mentions the cut to multiplayer matchmaking.
        • (Because Blizzard wants to force tournaments to pay them.)
      • Blizzard owns anything anyone makes for the game.
      • The original game's multiplayer is now broken as well.
    • Pat says this should be scrapped in favor of a Warcraft 4.
    • "I don't know how these things keep happening with Blizzard," says Pat.
      • "Someone has to get fired over stuff like this."
  • EA hit $1 billion in Q4 of 2019.
    • Ian thinks it's absurd that it's just fourth quarter.
    • 20% growth.
    • "most engaged means most gambled," says Pat.
    • French prosecutors file lawsuits. Europeans are years ahead of us in terms of legislation, says Pat.
      • (This is a lawsuit by someone to get it declared to be gambling. It could technically be done in the US as well.)
    • Pat says there's psychological block to gambling in a casino because you hand over cash.
    • The UK said lootboxes aren't gambling because the items aren't directly convertible to cash.
      • Pat says someone got paid off.
    • Pat ends the segment confusing lootboxes with DLC. (Lootboxes are random, DLC isn't.)
  • Stadia non-update
    • Google is doing nothing important with it.
      • Ian says Google needs to ramp up content to keep people interested.
    • GeForce Now is coming.
      • Pat pronounces it "G-E Force".
      • Pat says people will gravitate toward it, but Ian says it still has problems.
      • (GeForce Now basically just uses a person's Steam Library. Steam Link can do this, but also stream emulators like Dolphin.)
  • 36,000 games preserved by Flashpoint.
    • Pat didn't know super meatboy started as a flash game.
    • Ian says it's highly important that they preserve the Flash porn games.
    • Pat asks if Java is still around. Ian thinks so.
      • (Java plug-ins aren't used much, but the Java language is still popular.)
  • 3 NWC carts listed on ebay.
    • All over $120k each.
    • Pat says it was not in their interest to all post.
      • Should have done private sales he says. (We all know what Pat's been doing.)
    • Says games are not an investment. (Pat is going to profit off his collection.)
    • Suggests there may have been collusion in the baseball card trade. Pump up the price for an ebay sale.
    • Both say there are millionaires willing to play games with prices.
  • q&a games you enjoyed but will never go back to.
    • Ian:
      • Overwatch.
      • Rocket League, says he isn't good at it.
      • Call of Duty.
    • Pat:
      • 90s FPSes like Redneck Rampage.
      • 90s Sports games because "there are better ones out now".
      • 90s Beat 'Em Ups like Maximum Carnage.
        • He even played some for the book.

cu podcast 198:
SpoilerShow
  • the zoo
    • Ian and his wife Vonnie has been meeting a "friend" there every Monday.
    • Ian, at one time, had season passes to Disneyland.
      • (I was going to make a Consoomer Ian joke, but it turns out Disney jacked the prices massively over the years.)
        • Ian, even at his poverty wages, could have afforded them.
    • Pat says it must hurt to be pawed by a 700 pound cat.
  • academy awards
    • Ian is not a movie person. He gets up constantly when watching at home.
    • They say they hear that the right movie won, Parasite.
    • Pat saw Snowpiercer on USA Network. (Boomer.)
      • Pat says it's a trippy movie.
    • Pat hears someone came up with pause points for The Irishmen.
      • (And I heard that sucks and the whole movie should be watched in one go.)
    • Pat says he's not a Tarantino guy.
  • double dragon/kunio collections
    • Pat says says he wants to play new games, but gets rebuked by Ian "like a high school date".
      • (Pat "Date Rapist" Contri.)
  • CSGO adds muting of players
    • Ian says there's mass kick attemps in Wreckfest.
    • Pat says there was a court case where a player sued for being banned for abuse.
      • "muh rights," says Pat.
      • They point out it isn't covered by the First Amendments and violates the Terms of Service.
        • (A government could theoretically outlaw banning in game or set limits.)
  • battleaxe kickstarter
    • Pat says he hasn't seen a game releasd on Linux in years.
      • (There have been a bunch. Rocket League was on Linux until recently. Bunch of indies like FTL as well.)
    • Pat is in it for the music.
  • nintendo changes policy on stolen game keys
    • will restore accounts if victim tries to get money back from reseller
    • Pat says he left grocery store at Point Loma when guys in a van offered to sell him a high-end speaker system.
      • (He doesn't seem to know it, but this a common scam.)
  • q&a what franchises have been destroyed by greed.
    • Call of Duty/Modern Warfare.
    • Rock Band/Guitar Hero.
    • Skate series.
    • Pokemon.
    • Despite having never played the series, Pat says Assassin's Creed.
      • Ian wisely didn't include it because he hadn't played the series.
      • Pat lists all the Assassin's Creed games, but includes mobile/side games to raise the number.
        • (I've never heard anyone talk about the mobile games.)
      • He also says the gameplay is all the same.
        • (I've played a couple. While the basic stealth/assassin mechanic is there, there's significant differences.)
    • Pat lets the Madden roster updates off the hook. Ian doesn't.
    • [They then spend ten minutes discussing wrestling game controls.]
  • q&a what nintendo properties should be turned into movies/tv series
    • pikmin as CG animated series, says Ian.
    • Metroid as a series, says Ian.
    • Fire Emblem, says Ian.
    • Pat says he'd like to see a Zelda movie with a LotR budget. Something like $300 million. (Excessive. Do it for $100 million.)
    • Pat says there should be a Kirby cartoon.
      • Ian tells him there already was one.
    • Pat says Donkey Kong Country, mixed CG/traditional animation.
      • (there already was one, CGI only.)
    • They also say F-Zero. (There was an anime.)
    • Ian's a fan of Speed racer, but never saw movie.
      • Pat questions who was a fan of Speed Racer.
        • (It was on MTV or something. That's probably why the movie got made.)

cu podcast 199:
SpoilerShow
  • Boomer Pat does a "deep dive" on Police Academy series.
    • Complains that PG/PG-13 movies had nudity in them, but now don't.
      • (If I remember correctly, the MPAA has a limit count to words, nudity, violence.)
        • Basically, more nudity would mean less violence in a PG-13 movie.
  • Sonic movie
    • Coonsomer Ian's wife Vonnie is a huge fan. Has all the comics and cover variants, Has Memoriabilia.
    • Ian says it's pretty good.
    • Pat says it needs $250 million to be in the black.
    • Pat uses the Rotten Tomatoes "professional" critics to judge the movie's score.
      • Ian says the critics who don't like it seem to be out to hate it.
      • ("Top" critics are at 50%, so maybe Pat will re-judge it after bowing to experts.)
        • Movie Bob is an approved critic.
    • Pat says it's not a video game movie since it doesn't take place in Sonic's world.
      • He also says the Mario Bros. movie doesn't count either.
      • "Smurfs taken out of Smurf-land means it's not a Smurfs movie," says Pat.
    • Both don't like the Smurfs.
      • Ian is pro-Gargamel.
      • Pat prefers the Snorks.
      • Both don't know what Gargamel wanted with them. (It was to turn them into gold.)
  • nintendo playstation auction
    • got up to $350k
    • Pat says the value here, unlike sealed games, is probably legit since sports stars could bid on it.
    • Palmer Luckey is current top bid.
      • Pat says there's no benefit to announcing you bid on something.
      • Luckey claims he's done more for game preservation than anyone else.
      • Pat and Ian doubt it. "Our industry" has been doing it quietly for decades.
        • Think he might have something to do with hardware.
        • They say software presevation is more important than hardware.
          • (Hardware is equally important since you need to recreate the games to an accurate degree.)
            • Palmer might be creating FPGAs for all they know.
    • If the offer were $1.2 million, Pat would take it "under the table".
      • (Pat probably means "not open to the public", but "under the table" means evading taxes.)
  • PS5 manufacturing cost
    • Estimated to be $450.
    • Pat thinks stores won't buy it because they'd need to raise the price to something higher.
      • Ian has to explain that the margin is razor thin. They sell the console to sell the games.
      • (Pat still seems to think stores "buy" product.)
    • Ian says PS3 had a manufacturing cost of $800, but sold for $600, taking a $200 loss.
      • Thinks the PS5 could be $400 or $500.
    • Pat says most of the cost is due to the new SSDs.
      • "DRAM and the NAND Flash memory." (Pat spells out NAND for some reason.)
    • Pat says that at $500, PCs start to become more attractive.
    • Article says Sony might wait for new Xbox price before announcing.
      • Pat says it might be a Sony/Sega situation, but that inflation reduced impact of $100 price difference.
        • (Wages have been flat, so the difference still matters.)
          • Xbox One was $500, PS4 was $400.
    • ian expects $500 for both
  • grading protoypes
    • TLDR Wata got scammed by a fake prototype.
    • Pat says he doubted such things on Atari/Nintendo Age.
      • Said they could be samples/review copies that use retail boards.
  • q&a what sports haven't been made into video games that should be?
    • handball
    • ultimate frisbee or frolf
    • lacrosse
    • cornholing is good, says Pat.
      • Found it due to a waitress he met.
    • Axe Throwing is boring, says Pat, because there is no drama.
    • Pat wants a capture the flag game.
  • q&a what games cross the line between being similar and theft.
    • pat says he doesn't understand why people like fan games, but hate the clones.
      • (It's because the fan games come from love, the clones are due to just crass commercialism.)
    • Pat says he'd rather play the clone of Animal Crossing than a fan game.
  • pat complains about not for resale reviews
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Wed Mar 11, 2020 5:26 pm

I will give you props, BobbyBoucher, to not only listen to this awful podcast, but also to abridge it

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