April Lon Gon - Former tard wrangler of Spoony, future Bethesda C&D target

Whine and Bitch about people long after they become interesting to talk about
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Keith Chegwin
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Re: April Von Lon - Orc, Honey Wine Brewer, Professional Skyrim Player, BDSM Writer & Domina to Spoony

Post by Keith Chegwin » Mon Mar 18, 2019 1:14 am

I figured she only sticks with him because he's got a house and once that's gone, she's gone
Kugelfisch wrote:
Sat Mar 21, 2020 2:05 am
Imagine spending a billion US dollars to be a loser. Could've watched animu and be one for free.

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pibbs
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Re: April Von Lon - Orc, Honey Wine Brewer, Professional Skyrim Player, BDSM Writer & Domina to Spoony

Post by pibbs » Mon Mar 18, 2019 2:48 am

RedLine wrote:
Mon Mar 18, 2019 1:10 am
I'm surprised April's father hasn't counseled her to leave Spoony.
Because he doesn't want to support her or have her living in his house.
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Guest

Re: April Von Lon - Orc, Honey Wine Brewer, Professional Skyrim Player, BDSM Writer & Domina to Spoony

Post by Guest » Mon Mar 18, 2019 10:04 am

RedLine wrote:
Mon Mar 18, 2019 1:10 am
She's a nonobese woman under 40, so I think she can get a better meal ticket boyfriend than what she's got, but that window is closing fast.
She can't get a guy. She's fucking nuts.

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Kugelfisch
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Re: April Von Lon - Orc, Honey Wine Brewer, Professional Skyrim Player, BDSM Writer & Domina to Spoony

Post by Kugelfisch » Mon Mar 18, 2019 2:34 pm

A12 wrote:
Sun Mar 17, 2019 3:20 am
Captions please:

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SpoilerShow
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Cannons bray, the mighty quake!
Centuries of blood becomes erased!
I am the white ghost!

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oldbones

Re: April Von Lon - Orc, Honey Wine Brewer, Professional Skyrim Player, BDSM Writer & Domina to Spoony

Post by oldbones » Mon Mar 18, 2019 3:46 pm

Guest wrote:
Mon Mar 18, 2019 10:04 am
RedLine wrote:
Mon Mar 18, 2019 1:10 am
She's a nonobese woman under 40, so I think she can get a better meal ticket boyfriend than what she's got, but that window is closing fast.
She can't get a guy. She's fucking nuts.
She wouldn't be able to keep a normal guy. Sell your creepy fucking dolls. Stop stinking up the place with your shitty knock off perfume. Stop playing your all nude, demon raping modded Skyrim. Get a full time job in an office.

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Guest

Re: April Von Lon - Orc, Honey Wine Brewer, Professional Skyrim Player, BDSM Writer & Domina to Spoony

Post by Guest » Mon Mar 18, 2019 3:52 pm

No, folding shirts is the right job for her. She'd fuck up anything more challenging.

She's been there for years and they haven't made her supervisor or even increased her hours. She must be totally fucking useless, even at a menial job.

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Re: April Von Lon - Orc, Honey Wine Brewer, Professional Skyrim Player, BDSM Writer & Domina to Spoony

Post by Guest » Mon Mar 18, 2019 7:32 pm

RedLine wrote:
Mon Mar 18, 2019 1:10 am
I'm surprised April's father hasn't counseled her to leave Spoony. She seems to have a decent relationship with her dad and I think she'd respect his opinion instead of rebelling.
Even if Spoony has some sort of okay-ish inheritance/trust fund source (which may not even be the case), there aren't many happy ending scenarios for April if she stays around.
She's a nonobese woman under 40, so I think she can get a better meal ticket boyfriend than what she's got, but that window is closing fast.
My guess is that maybe her father is just as useless as Spoony - jobless, maybe living on a disability, lazy etc.

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pibbs
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Re: April Von Lon - Orc, Honey Wine Brewer, Professional Skyrim Player, BDSM Writer & Domina to Spoony

Post by pibbs » Tue Mar 19, 2019 12:54 am

Without the danger hair, goofy hairstyles, and clown clothes she's borderline cute in a middle-aged kind of way. That's about the best I can do, compliments wise.
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RedLine
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Re: April Von Lon - Orc, Honey Wine Brewer, Professional Skyrim Player, BDSM Writer & Domina to Spoony

Post by RedLine » Tue Mar 19, 2019 1:54 am

pibbs wrote:
Tue Mar 19, 2019 12:54 am
Without the danger hair, goofy hairstyles, and clown clothes she's borderline cute in a middle-aged kind of way. That's about the best I can do, compliments wise.
I'm pretty much in agreement. She also doesn't seem to Trump-post on Twitter despite being a danger hair in 2019 and having to deal with all of Spoony's ramblings.
Yes, the creepy doll / Iron Bull stuff is very bizarre and her earnings potential is nearly $0, but I think she could be mostly normal if she left the Spoony-verse.
Guest wrote:
Mon Mar 18, 2019 7:32 pm
My guess is that maybe her father is just as useless as Spoony - jobless, maybe living on a disability, lazy etc.
This is a possibility. Still, many years ago April was savvy enough to tape her tits together and go bag herself a socially-awkward internet celebrity making over $5K a month. That plan has obviously fallen apart and now she needs to take the city bus to her two minimum wage jobs just to keep things afloat. You would think she would be dangling her hooks out for an upgrade (and maybe she is). "Free" houses are nice, but lots of people have houses. It isn't like Brad from MKE lives in a gutter.

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Re: April Von Lon - Orc, Honey Wine Brewer, Professional Skyrim Player, BDSM Writer & Domina to Spoony

Post by Liar Revealed » Tue Mar 19, 2019 3:27 am

Brad from MKE could live in his mother's basement for all we know.
And April only looks tolerable with her glasses ON. Without them, she looks like a lizard-person.
お前はもう死んでいる。

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