Rank the Internet Nobody Cinematic Universe

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Rushy
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Rank the Internet Nobody Cinematic Universe

Post by Rushy » Thu May 16, 2019 4:28 pm

The IN movies seem to have mostly died out these days, thank God, but somehow, they still managed to be outdo the 2010s Universal Monsters franchise. So here's my thoughts on them, from worst to best. Haven't seen the Ashens film yet, will probably check it when the Polybius one comes out.

#5. Suburban Knights - Literally all I remember from this one is a bunch of cosplayers wandering around a forest with that ugly digital tint over the whole thing. Oh, and "I will eat your peaness!!" I can't imagine even fans of these Youtubers getting something out of this one.

#4. AT4W: The Movie - Knowing that this was a vanity project, I still couldn't have anticipated Linkara attempting to redo To Boldly Flee with zero self-awareness, and give Marzgurl dramatic monologues and shit. This one has that Room-style "omg he was taking it seriously" cringe, and you can get a few chuckles out of that. Bonus points for Nash, who manages to be legit funny a couple of times by being the only normie in the group.

#3. Kickassia - The only one that seems to remotely succeed at what these anniversary celebrations were said to be - just bringing these personalities together for laughs. The laughs part is subjective, of course, but here they actually use the running gags from their own videos as opposed to them trying to just ape other movies, and the premise involving them all managing the real life micronation wasn't a terrible idea - it's not something you'd immediately think of, the fact that Molossia actually exists is mildly amusing and it provides a reason for there being so many celebs around aside from "they're part of Channel Awesome".

#2. To Boldly Flee - Borders on being watchable due to the improved production quality and the occasional funny joke. Not much else to say really, it just wasn't as painful for me to watch as the previous two.

#1. AVGN: The Movie - Mediocre, but the only legitimate film of the bunch. The cinematography isn't half bad(although Rolfe's attempt at duplicating cheesy special effects really hurts the credibility of the production) and neither is the basic story. The film really only has two problems. One's a lack of restraint - it feels less like a coherent story and more like James desperately trying to cram everything he would ever want to see in a movie into this even if it has no reason to be here. And the second is that without any of the recognisable AVGN alumni, it doesn't really feel like a Cinemassacre production. I know Matei and Kyle Justin probably didn't want to be in this, but they could've gotten somebody else in a Bugs Bunny costume or something, just to tie it in with the series a bit more. As it is, it's almost like watching some kind of alternate reality AVGN.
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Re: Rank the Internet Nobody Cinematic Universe

Post by Guest » Thu May 16, 2019 9:22 pm

AVGN's the only one that's actually a film. The others are basically backyard home movies fill with faggots but a strange lack of gay sex.

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VoiceOfReasonPast
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Re: Rank the Internet Nobody Cinematic Universe

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Thu May 16, 2019 10:07 pm

That, and Ashens and the Quest for the Gay Child. Everything else doesn't even deserve to be on the same list.
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Kugelfisch
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Re: Rank the Internet Nobody Cinematic Universe

Post by Kugelfisch » Fri May 17, 2019 1:50 am

The Ashens and AVGN movies also had actual film production crews on set. It shows.
RedLine wrote:
Fri May 10, 2019 3:21 am
Marzie desperately wants to feel ProJared's cock and everyone directly involved in the IN universe is an insane mess.
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Re: Rank the Internet Nobody Cinematic Universe

Post by Guest » Fri May 17, 2019 3:15 am

Rushy wrote:
Thu May 16, 2019 4:28 pm
#1. AVGN: The Movie - ...I know Matei and Kyle Justin probably didn't want to be in this...
They have a cameo for a few seconds. When James was filming the movie, Mike was left behind to run the website.

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mad bum
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Re: Rank the Internet Nobody Cinematic Universe

Post by mad bum » Fri May 17, 2019 4:24 am

The list should be more in lieu of movies like disco, linkara movie, basically those spergs who had a budget. Here's my list.

5. Avgn: absolute trash of a movie where they retconned some black dude and made out about some adventure no one wanted

4. Disco: Brad is trash

3. Blockbuster buster: DHI was right, this "movie" was boring and the behind the scenes were funnier.

2. Ashens, probably. I never seen his movies

1. Linkara: I've never laughed so hard at a movie, it was the room levels of legendary and should be treated as such.
"Dude, 5 moves, I'm sitting on your arm until it's snapping. But to each their own."

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Rapeculture
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Re: Rank the Internet Nobody Cinematic Universe

Post by Rapeculture » Fri May 17, 2019 4:35 am

I was drinking Jack and coke when we were all watching the Linkara movie together. I blacked out and missed half of it, thank fuck.
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Kugelfisch
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Re: Rank the Internet Nobody Cinematic Universe

Post by Kugelfisch » Fri May 17, 2019 4:50 am

Rapeculture wrote:
Fri May 17, 2019 4:35 am
I was drinking Jack and coke when we were all watching the Linkara movie together. I blacked out and missed half of it, thank fuck.
Same here. I barely remember that shit show.
RedLine wrote:
Fri May 10, 2019 3:21 am
Marzie desperately wants to feel ProJared's cock and everyone directly involved in the IN universe is an insane mess.
DHI.txt

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Rapeculture
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Re: Rank the Internet Nobody Cinematic Universe

Post by Rapeculture » Fri May 17, 2019 5:34 am

Kugelfisch wrote:
Fri May 17, 2019 4:50 am
Rapeculture wrote:
Fri May 17, 2019 4:35 am
I was drinking Jack and coke when we were all watching the Linkara movie together. I blacked out and missed half of it, thank fuck.
Same here. I barely remember that shit show.
I remember it being LookAtHowGreatIAm.mov. As if it was going to be anything else from that self-obsessed twat.
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mad bum
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Re: Rank the Internet Nobody Cinematic Universe

Post by mad bum » Fri May 17, 2019 5:44 am

It probably wouldn't be as funny alone, but neither is neil breen
"Dude, 5 moves, I'm sitting on your arm until it's snapping. But to each their own."

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