Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

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rabidtictac
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Re: Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

Post by rabidtictac » Fri May 25, 2018 11:15 am

Feel free to spoil soylo the last gaydar. I won't be watching it since the entire concept is a meme joke from redlettermedia.
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AngrySpoonySnob
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Re: Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

Post by AngrySpoonySnob » Fri May 25, 2018 1:36 pm

This is all I can take from the solo movie, even without any influence of him ripping it up. From those clips he puts in I have 0 desire to ever watch that garbage, the acting is horrible.

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Re: Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

Post by MegaNigger » Fri May 25, 2018 4:06 pm

Yes please spoil the movie! I'll never see it.
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Liar Revealed
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Re: Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

Post by Liar Revealed » Fri May 25, 2018 4:51 pm

So the presence of multiple "stronk womyn" characters is irritating.
SpoilerShow

#1: L3-37, the "droids rights activist" droid. Yes, it's as bad as it sounds. Her voice sounds like a 320 pound British Remainer. Fortunately, this droid doesn't make it through the whole movie. When she dies, we're supposed to care. Lando goes absolutely apeshit and rushes out in a hail of gunfire trying to rescue her, gets shot, and Han has to save him. Cries like a bitch when she dies. Then they upload her brain into the Millennium Falcon computer. So now every time they talk about the quirky Falcon computer in the OT, we'll be reminded of her. Ugh.

#2: Enfys Nest, "the leader of a gang of pirates." Yes, the rumors are true. "Badass" takes of its mask toward the end and it's a spotty little ginger girl. It turns out she's a freedom fighter. It's implied she's in the rebellion, but not clear.

#3: Qi'ra: Love interest. She started out in the movie as a regular damsel in distress which was OK. But of course that couldn't last. There's a time skip of three and she's suddenly the #2 person in a crime syndicate. There's no other way she could have done this without pulling a JesuOtaku and sleeping her way to the top, but the movie doesn't really deal with it.
She didn't really bother me that much until the end. Han has this fight with the mob boss and is about to shoot him dead, when she betrays Han (this is like the 3rd or 4th time he's betrayed in this movie), knocking away his blaster and saving the bad guy. Then, SHE betrays the mob boss and kills him. WHY!?!?!? It's like Kathleen Kennedy had to deny Solo his moment of victory in his own movie.
The mob follows a mysterious leader, and Daenerys Targaryen decides to skype call him at the end. I thought this would be Jabba the Hutt, but no, it's Darth Maul for some reason. This served no purpose, and just confused all my friends, who didn't see his robot legs.

Not everything is wrapped up at the end. Han's "one true love" Daenerys doesn't die, so they must be convinced this is going to do well enough for a sequel where she's Maul's apprentice.

There are other minor female characters and they're all stronk womyn.

Good part: Woody Harrelson killed off Aurra Sing offscreen. She was a character George Lucas inserted into one shot of The Phantom Menace just to sell action figures and comics.
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da PAC Nigguh
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Re: Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

Post by da PAC Nigguh » Fri May 25, 2018 5:02 pm

Unspoiler all that shit. Fuck this movie.
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Keith Chegwin
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Re: Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

Post by Keith Chegwin » Fri May 25, 2018 5:07 pm

Yeah, seriously, nobody cares about being 'spoiled' (except maybe some butthurt Lupaposters)
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Re: Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Fri May 25, 2018 5:13 pm

Guest wrote:
Thu May 24, 2018 11:14 pm
It was confirmed two pages back, beyotch!

What you should be saying is Darth Maul in Kenobi: A Star Whores Story confirmed, since they wouldn't bring him back for nothing.
Maybe they'll explain how he was genderqueer all along.
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VoiceOfReasonPast
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Re: Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Fri May 25, 2018 5:16 pm

Just gonna quote from the least important spoiler bit.
Liar Revealed wrote:
Fri May 25, 2018 4:51 pm
Good part: Woody Harrelson killed off Aurra Sing offscreen. She was a character George Lucas inserted into one shot of The Phantom Menace just to sell action figures and comics.
They got quite a bit of mileage out of her in Clone Wars and possibly Rebels, too. People must dig those freaky fingers.
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Re: Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

Post by Guest » Fri May 25, 2018 5:28 pm

#1: L3-37, the "droids rights activist" droid. Yes, it's as bad as it sounds. Her voice sounds like a 320 pound British Remainer. Fortunately, this droid doesn't make it through the whole movie. When she dies, we're supposed to care. Lando goes absolutely apeshit and rushes out in a hail of gunfire trying to rescue her, gets shot, and Han has to save him. Cries like a bitch when she dies. Then they upload her brain into the Millennium Falcon computer. So now every time they talk about the quirky Falcon computer in the OT, we'll be reminded of her. Ugh.
Emasculation of Lando complete. Also emasculation of the Millennium Falcon. Didn't know it was even possible to do that to spaceship, but you learn something new every day.
She didn't really bother me that much until the end. Han has this fight with the mob boss and is about to shoot him dead, when she betrays Han (this is like the 3rd or 4th time he's betrayed in this movie), knocking away his blaster and saving the bad guy. Then, SHE betrays the mob boss and kills him. WHY!?!?!? It's like Kathleen Kennedy had to deny Solo his moment of victory in his own movie.
I guarantee you that's exactly why. Might not have been Kathleen Kennedy though. Might have been the writer. Writer is a male feminist, right?
The mob follows a mysterious leader, and Daenerys Targaryen decides to skype call him at the end. I thought this would be Jabba the Hutt, but no, it's Darth Maul for some reason. This served no purpose, and just confused all my friends, who didn't see his robot legs.
So they don't even explain his reappearance and it doesn't even matter to the plot? This dumpster fire sounds worse than The Last Jedi. It least that managed to occasional be trollish and surprising with its plot twists.

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Re: Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

Post by Guest » Fri May 25, 2018 5:29 pm

Didn't tag spoilers because who gives a shit.

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