E3 2019

Talk about the life consuming, celibacy inducing hobby that is all the rage these days.
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Kugelfisch
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Re: E3 2019

Post by Kugelfisch » Sun Jun 16, 2019 10:31 pm

Belly of the Beast is prime Seagal kino.

Terrible quality video but give it a watch. It's got everything that makes that movie one of the most hilarious things I've ever seen. That fucking floor slide in the infiltration sequence, his Aikido bullshit and all his fighting being flabby, fat-handed backhands and shit.
If you're looking for something terrible to laugh at with buddies, look no further.
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rabidtictac
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Re: E3 2019

Post by rabidtictac » Sun Jun 16, 2019 11:04 pm

To be fair, Aikido in general is hilarious bullshit and would get a laugh even without Steven Seagull's shit acting and pudgy flailing.

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Kugelfisch
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Re: E3 2019

Post by Kugelfisch » Sun Jun 16, 2019 11:35 pm

Seagal is the western champion of that nonsense, though. I don't doubt that a sizeable portion of practitioners learned of it through him in some way.
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Some Sick Fuck
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Re: E3 2019

Post by Some Sick Fuck » Mon Jun 17, 2019 12:28 am

Oh, I'm sure his later stuff has plenty of these hillarious moments - I can see Sumo Steven thinks he's in the Matrix given how he sends the bad guys flying :lol:
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Kugelfisch
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Re: E3 2019

Post by Kugelfisch » Mon Jun 17, 2019 1:15 am

Some Sick Fuck wrote:
Mon Jun 17, 2019 12:28 am
Oh, I'm sure his later stuff has plenty of these hillarious moments - I can see Sumo Steven thinks he's in the Matrix given how he sends the bad guys flying :lol:
Matrix sound about right. You haven't even seen the best of it yet.

The second half of the fight is more of his glorious old man limp-handed slapping that looks about as powerful as a toddler slapping you.
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Re: E3 2019

Post by Guest » Mon Jun 17, 2019 1:38 am

His last movie wasn't bad (General Commander). He didn't use doubles but his two fights were about 30 seconds long each. I guess he's finally hearing the criticism.

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Re: E3 2019

Post by Guest » Mon Jun 17, 2019 7:06 am

Hideaki Anno cast his hafu daughter as the star of one of his live action movies.

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VoiceOfReasonPast
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Re: E3 2019

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:15 pm

As long as it keeps his #depression at bay, I guess.
Guest wrote:
Sun Jun 16, 2019 10:15 pm
My favorite Seagalism is in Above The Law when he's tied to a chair and the bad guy injects with a special drug that will make him into a drooling retard unable to fight back... and he just wills the drug not to have any effect before breaking the chair apart and killing everyone in three seconds.

He's supposed to be a Chicago cop.
What a coincidence that someone mentioned Bud Spencer on the last page, 'cause that seriously sounds like something that could happen in one of his movies. Minus the killing, I guess.
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rabidtictac
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Re: E3 2019

Post by rabidtictac » Mon Jun 17, 2019 10:00 pm

It sounds like a bad self-insert fanfic.
RAPEMAN wrote:
Mon Aug 03, 2020 9:42 pm
>liberal: ban x
>trump: yeah ban x
>liberal: no bro x is awesome

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Re: E3 2019

Post by Guest » Mon Jun 17, 2019 10:06 pm

rabidtictac wrote:
Mon Jun 17, 2019 10:00 pm
It sounds like a bad self-insert fanfic.
It's a Seagal movie, yeah.

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