Dead Horse Interchange

Found another weird Antifa violent fantasy RPG: No Nazis in Valhalla.
Tell us, Kickstarter, what is the amazing premise of this game?!

January 1945 the writing is on the wall, and it is clear that the Nazis are going to surrender. The Thule society, through mysticism and technology, send all members they found relevant, back in time to the year 865 England. Their goal to ally themselves with the Great Heathen Army whom they idolize. Their presence is met with harsh resistance and a new war breaks out.

I probably would've gone back into the past a few centuries earlier so I could ask the Saxons for help instead of the less German Scandinavians, but I digress.
I also probably would've picked actual Germany.
I'm also not sure what allying yourself with vikings can do for your fight against tanks, but I guess the idea is to destroy the Allies with a time paradox? No idea, since the page doesn't tell you anything beyond this quote.
The full book probably won't give you any concrete answers as well because the whole thing is just 36 pages long. At that short a book this really just looks like a quick grift.

This also looks like some schoolyard-level cope.
"Oh yeah, you think Aryans were so great?! I'm gonna write a book where your precious Nazis meet the ancient Aryans and get their shit kicked out of them for being fash scum!"

EDIT: In other news I didn't know it was the 40th anniversary for Das Schwarze Auge, and take a look at this:


Alrik is back uwu !

>the thule society is instantly proven right by performing actual magic
Uh, okay.
>they encounter resistance
To what? White, Germanic supremacy in a place where absolutely everyone is white and Germanic?
The international banking Yid that doesn't exist there?
Authoritarian, war-dependent fascism? By a conquering, looting and subjugating feudalist kingdom?


No seriously, what does a Nazi even do in that setting?
It's the writers dreaming up a power fantasy scenario that forgets about giving their transported enemy an actual issue to deal with.
I'm sure it makes total sense in their heads, insofar that they didn't think further than "W-well yeah? Th-the true A-arians would've thought you are p-poopyheads!" being a super sick burn and then trying to gloat about it, utterly refusing any explanation when called out.


Pure projection again. Because if they were taken back to their ideal time, Daddy Stalin would not hesitate to put those queer layabouts against the nearest wall.

Americans learned about the Thule society by watching the first Fullmetal Alchemist movie.

Kugelfisch wrote: ↑

Sat Mar 09, 2024 9:58 pm

Pure projection again. Because if they were taken back to their ideal time, Daddy Stalin would not hesitate to put those queer layabouts against the nearest wall.

I don't think this kind of forced bad end is part of the various commie revolution fantasy RPGs like Comrades or Sigmata.
I especially love the latter because the PCs have to literally tard wrangle the various branches of the revolution, lest they side with The Fash (tm) instead

Maybe I should write one of these games myself. It will probably have a 3-act-structure:

1. Misery porn. Live out all your oppression fantasies that don't seem to happen IRL despite all the stories you read on social media.
2. "Peaceful" protests. Now it's time kill white people, or whatever other kind of violent revenge fantasy you have.
3. Congratulations, society is now FUBAR. Roll on a table to see what kind of shitty existence this brand new world has in store for you. Will you be one of the first to be put against the wall, or will you and the other PCs find a new home in a Khmer-style death camp? The possibilities are endless(ly depressing)!

(The system will probably be a clone of Blades in the Dark, since that's apparently the hip new thing atm.)

It's just so short-sighted.
You want to indulge in a fantasy of sending your enemy back in time to a time and place where rhey would get their shit fucked up.
Okay, fair enough.
You write them to be bumbling idiots who go there themselves and only realise their mistake when they arrive, because they didn't think shit through.
Still fine by me.

But sending the druidic Nazi society back to a time where none of their ideological standpoints apply at all, making anyone rhat thinks about the premise for a second wonder where the conflict even is?

I get the most basic level of the premise. Idiots pander to a group, group turns out absolutely hating them.

That would work with bourgeois faggots that think they can make pro-homo art all day instead of working, looking down onto the working class and fancying themselves intellectuals, being sent to the Soviet Union.

It works with white college faggots being sent to Somalia and despite being BLM allies having a hard time.

It would even work with АЗОВ battalion idiots being sent to 40s Germany or klansmen being sent there.


But their premise is like sending IRA members to the court of King Arthur.
I guess they could bomb the English. But their conflict makes no sense in those times.

Well, for true fascism to rise no matter the setting, all you need is one war-loving Communist autist to get expelled from the Communist party due to his support for the current war.

Kugelfisch wrote: ↑

Sat Mar 09, 2024 11:31 pm

But sending the druidic Nazi society back to a time where none of their ideological standpoints apply at all, making anyone rhat thinks about the premise for a second wonder where the conflict even is?

I get the most basic level of the premise. Idiots pander to a group, group turns out absolutely hating them.

You're trying to apply too much logic here. The major pandering her comes from the writers for their antifa target audience.
The whole book is basically them forcing a nonsensical situation that tries to "take back" Aryans from Nazi ideology.
The only scenario even more brain-dead blatant would involve transgender Indians killing Nazis with swastika-shaped shurikens.

I highly doubt it is worth trying to understand fascists in antifa fiction. They just do shit 'cause they're evil. Any more detail and you might actually humanize them, and we can't have that.

Also 10bux on Scandinavians being portrayed as queer commies. Bonus points if a good chunk of them are black for no explained reason.

Of course the creator is a pedophile neckbeard.

wulfenlord wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 10, 2024 9:32 am

Of course the creator is a pedophile neckbeard.

That goes without saying.

After having to beg forgiveness for the usage of AI art in recent D&D and MTG products / marketing campaigns, Hasbro's CEO just said fuck it, let's double down.

“This is cutting-edge technology, and Hasbro is a 100-year-old company…when you talk about the richness of the lore and the depth of the brands–D&D has 50 years of content that we can mine. Literally thousands of adventures that we’ve created, probably tens of millions of words we own and can leverage. Magic: The Gathering has been around for 35 years, more than 15,000 cards we can use in something like that,” Cocks said. “We can leverage all of that to be able to build very interesting and compelling use cases for AI that can bring our characters to life. We can build tools that aid in content creation for users or create really interesting gamified scenarios around them.”

So the idea is that since both D&D and MTG have such a huge back catalogue, they can just feed that into an AI and have it shit out new content.
I thought the D&D back catalogue was problematic? Every digital store page for pre-5e books tells me the book is probably racist and/or problematic in some other capacity

And I guess those anthology adventures made by dozens of diversity hires weren't profitable after all, but I wouldn't go so far as to remove meatbags entirely.
Speaking of diversity hires: Their new target audience is gonna "love" this. Tumblr hates AI art with a passion (though that probably doesn't prevent at least some of them to use it, anyways; it's not bad if you don't get caught).