Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

Whine and Bitch about people long after they become interesting to talk about
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drisko
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Re: Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

Post by drisko » Tue Dec 10, 2019 8:51 pm

Every man has his breaking point. Unless they were teenagers and just grew out of it.

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GitGud
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Re: Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

Post by GitGud » Fri Dec 20, 2019 9:33 pm

Scene 4

Lewies Friend drives his old, slightly rustet Ford on the Main Street of Bumbfuck, a nic small city in the north west, wille Lewie himself sits on the passenger seat with a frown on his face and crossed arms.
"Hey, Whats up, L? Still a little Butthurt."
He huffs and stares at his friend with an expression that should show anger, but it looks more like the fac of an 5 year old that didn´t got the candy he wanted.
"You had to rub it in, hmm? YOu know exactly that my dad is like the devil when he can send someone to work. I don´t want do do that. You know?"
"Hey. Everybody has to do something, right? Your Parents can´t give you everything forever."
"I know....."
Lewie pulls his chin to his chest, ans starts to frown again.
"But i wanna be an Artist. Ans sell my storys and comics."
"Yeah, they are sure...something."
The Frind flicks the turn signal on, and pulls the car into an emty parking space infront of the local Comic and Tabletop store, and after an moment the two friends leave the car behind to enter the store. The Bell rings as they enter and the older Brother and Owner of the store looks up from his news paper.
"There you are, Nolan. Damn, you are 45 Minutes to late."
"I had to pick up Lewie..."
The older brother leans a bit to the left side so he can look at the person behind Nolan, befor he letzs out a slight sigh.
"Hey...Lewie."
He looks back to his younger brother that smiles.
"Ok, but now get to work. Ther are some Boxes of new mercendise in the back, and the new display for the new D&D Version was deliverd. make some room so we can plac the stuff later when i am back."
"Oh, the new edition, I take one Core Rulebook with me when i close and...."
"Noooo, you will not. Hell, the sale starts next Monday and if the Thing gets on the Streets to soon, the Company fucks me. And if that happens, i will fuck you, is that clear?"
"Yes......"
Nolan looks to the ground like a little child, but his Brother crosses his arms infront of his chest.
"That works on Mom and Dad, Nolan. Thre are exactly 20 copies of that Core book out back, and when i turn the key in the evening, there will be 20....sealed, untouched Copies. You hear me?"
"Yes......"
"Good, so get your ass in gear, i have an appointment at the doctors office. So dont fuck around...Both of you"

Without another word the older Brother goes around the Counter to leave the store, and after a few moments the sound of an loud sportscar engine thunders throught the slowly closing entrance door.
"Your brother is a dick"
"Tell him that"
"I would, but the i never get a chance to sell my comic"
Nolan starts to laught.
"He tossed your first draft in the Trash, remember?"
"Yeah, i know, but the new vrsion will be better. I´ts full of Lasers, Spaceships, exotic new races. Planets in Danger...."
"Like in Superman Comics?"
Lewie gets a litte red on his cheeks while he shakes his head.
"Nooooo, much more cooler. And my Hero is much stronger. He even has his own Space Ship...."
"If he is stronger than Superman, why dos he needs a ship"
"He don´t need the ship, it´s for the time when he has guests. Normal Human or Aliens can´t exist in space."
"Uhm....."
"See, i am right. But my Hero has a strong enemy, too. A Nemesis cloned from his own DNA by an evil scientist....."
"Like Bizarro....?"
The red on Lewies cheeks explodes so his whole Head turns beed red. He putts his hands on his head and starts pulling on his hair while his mouth starts to slighly foam. He stomps his feet, and after some Moments he screams before he looks at his friend.
"Why do people not understand the concept of inspiration. How many Directors in Hollywood get "inspired" by older movies or even old TV series? Why....are.....People .....so,.......ARRRRRRGGGGGG"
Without another word Lewie turns around and walks to the back room of the store, were normaly the Tabletop or RPG sessions are hold. He sits down on the Table and pulls out an old looking pper notebook and some pencils. After he catches his breath he opens the Cover and starts to work on his comic......
I will return when i the times are dire.
"I had this nurse yesterday who was super careful giving me morphine and she sais "this could kill 4 of me lols"

That was fun.
-Auli

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Poonoo
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Re: Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

Post by Poonoo » Fri Dec 20, 2019 11:25 pm

Old Black Man wrote:
Sun Dec 08, 2019 8:33 am
Okay so I decided to check out some old critic episodes, wanting to see things with a fresh set of eyes knowing all the CA bullshit, and there are two unintentionally hilarious moments in this video, knowing what we know.

40 seconds in a joke about Doge’s strawman troll masturbating to the green M&M and how it’s unnatural.

Then 3:40 he talks about him and cockslut getting a fact wrong, and has Linky apologize and even say he’s gay for Doge. Got its like irony, it tastes like iron.

>Douchey McNitpick was making fun of Linkara this whole time and not his fans

Doge's a genius and knows damn well Linkara is too autistic to know when he is being mocked :lol:
BenComicGraphics wrote:
Mon Dec 09, 2019 3:04 pm
So the friend told me some stuff about the wedding.

Viga is fiercely territorial about any woman near Lewis. She has death glared women for just saying hi to Lewis. Friend has confirmed this is a norbit situation.

The wedding had pizza brought in. They rented a fancy hall, got dressed up in suits and ordered pizza. Friend thinks it was pizza hut.

They ordered too much pizza and was handing it out to guests as they left. Friend attributes this as a Minnesotan thing.
Did they have tendies as the entree? This is too perfect, you sure he's not fucking with you? :lol: :lol:
Old Black Man wrote:
Wed Nov 27, 2019 9:11 pm
Also Lupa’s grandmother? Please, we know that hag was alive and well back then. She’s like the dude from Highlander, only a cunt.
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BenComicGraphics
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Re: Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

Post by BenComicGraphics » Sat Dec 21, 2019 12:03 am

Poonoo wrote:
Fri Dec 20, 2019 11:25 pm
Old Black Man wrote:
Sun Dec 08, 2019 8:33 am
Okay so I decided to check out some old critic episodes, wanting to see things with a fresh set of eyes knowing all the CA bullshit, and there are two unintentionally hilarious moments in this video, knowing what we know.

40 seconds in a joke about Doge’s strawman troll masturbating to the green M&M and how it’s unnatural.

Then 3:40 he talks about him and cockslut getting a fact wrong, and has Linky apologize and even say he’s gay for Doge. Got its like irony, it tastes like iron.

>Douchey McNitpick was making fun of Linkara this whole time and not his fans

Doge's a genius and knows damn well Linkara is too autistic to know when he is being mocked :lol:
BenComicGraphics wrote:
Mon Dec 09, 2019 3:04 pm
So the friend told me some stuff about the wedding.

Viga is fiercely territorial about any woman near Lewis. She has death glared women for just saying hi to Lewis. Friend has confirmed this is a norbit situation.

The wedding had pizza brought in. They rented a fancy hall, got dressed up in suits and ordered pizza. Friend thinks it was pizza hut.

They ordered too much pizza and was handing it out to guests as they left. Friend attributes this as a Minnesotan thing.
Did they have tendies as the entree? This is too perfect, you sure he's not fucking with you? :lol: :lol:
The information this person has presented is consistent and has been verified via other methods I cannot get into just yet.

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Guest

Re: Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

Post by Guest » Sat Dec 21, 2019 6:46 am

BenComicGraphics wrote:
Mon Dec 09, 2019 3:04 pm
Viga is fiercely territorial about any woman near Lewis. She has death glared women for just saying hi to Lewis. Friend has confirmed this is a norbit situation.
Well sure. Linky paid her rent for months or even years. I can't imagine she pays half the billth & mortgage, she just freeloads off him entirely now. She has to keep him on a tight leash or he might realise there are women out there who aren't disgusting fat slobs who only see you as an ATM.

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Complicity
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Re: Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

Post by Complicity » Sat Dec 21, 2019 7:43 am

Guest wrote:
Sat Dec 21, 2019 6:46 am
there are women out there who aren't disgusting fat slobs who only see you as an ATM.
They have no interest in him, and he can't afford one of them.
The real competition for that gorilla are troons, and not even the ones who look like Blaire White or Sue Lighting.
She's more on par with ChrisChan.
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VoiceOfReasonPast
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Re: Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Sat Dec 21, 2019 9:34 am

Apparently his latest HOPR was just a "revised" version (aka he probably just cut out any "Channel Awesome" logos and bits) of the one he did almost 10 years ago.
I wonder why he struggles to break 50k views :thinking:

Also The Best Fucking Anniversary Movie Evar (tm) will not only be released on CD, but also on DVD later. I guess that version makes it easier to tell who's talking :mrgreen:
Autism attracts more autism. Sooner or later, an internet nobody will attract the exact kind of fans - and detractors - he deserves.
-Yours Truly

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Kugelfisch
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Re: Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

Post by Kugelfisch » Sat Dec 21, 2019 4:11 pm

I'll buy the LaserDisk version.
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Cannons bray, the mighty quake!
Centuries of blood becomes erased!
I am the white ghost!

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VoiceOfReasonPast
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Re: Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

Post by VoiceOfReasonPast » Sat Dec 21, 2019 6:18 pm

I'm not sure he knows what that is. Unless Power Rangers was available on that format.
Autism attracts more autism. Sooner or later, an internet nobody will attract the exact kind of fans - and detractors - he deserves.
-Yours Truly

4 wikia: static -> vignette

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Re: Nasty Cockslut aka Uncle Linky

Post by Guest » Sat Dec 21, 2019 10:07 pm

No bullshit, I actually live a few miles from Green Ranger's martial arts school. I've toyed with taking lessons so I can impress the auties with tales of training under Tommy. (Dude looks like a tatted up Mark McGrath now.)

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