DSP Thread: Bugged Forum mechanics

[rabidtictac]

Valedictorian maths skills.

This is a great example of DSP lying for what seems to be no reason.

Why bother lying about this? Not only is it painfully easy to prove he's lying, but why lie at all? Why not just say, "I got a bunch of feedback from people who said they weren't interested in The Last of War, and some of those are probably detractors, but it's still interesting."

He thinks he's such a master ruseman. "I put in this troll choice to weed out trolls" so there's legit no option for if you don't want to watch GoW? Way to ruse yourself, DSP.

We all know that, whatever he says trying to shill for NuGoW, he'll just crawl back to PUBG, Call of Duty and Bloodborne if the attendance and money gets too low.

Hell, for all he's been bitching about monster hunter world (he continues to cry about how it's repetitive and boring and only sheeple like it,) he'll eventually crawl over to it in desperation for attention. BTW I've been playing MHW and it's great. You don't need to play with other people to have a great time with the game. It's hardly repetitive. The game is very generous with monster drops. You might farm a monster 2-3 times for a full set, but that's a lot less than in previous games. And auto-crafting lets you shortcut a lot of basic items that you'll find yourself crafting a lot. DSP is missing out on a great time because HE has decided he doesn't want to play the game. But he'll play it eventually. We can be sure of that.

[Some Sick Fuck]

Some ruse... Phil couldn't outsmart used teabag if he tried. I keep saying that, but at the same time, Phil has the looks and manners of used cars salesman, and he happened to convince quite a lot of paypigs, so I guess he can outsmart some people.

They just aren't necessarily dumber than him (since that's really difficult unless you get people who are legit touched in the head), but I'm assuming they are either autistic, socially awkward to an extreme, or just insane like BSV.

DSP is missing out on a great time because HE has decided he doesn't want to play the game.

He doesn't know how to have a good time to begin with. He lacks the mental capacity to appreciate games that don't fit his very limited selection. Chances are, if it's dumb, macho and good looking, Phil will like it.

[Kugelfisch]

Oh yeah, sure, I don't buy shit day one for the poor streamers. He chose a dead end career. To anybody who isn't a total idiot, it was instantly clear that while you can make some serious cash streaming and shit that it's not secure income. Phil earned really, really well and is honestly still earning very well. If he wasn't so dumb and childish he'd be loaded.
I don't blame anyone who stumbled upon a gold mine to exploit it. PDP did it as well and for that kinda money I'd be fine playing the screaming retard for kids as well. But me doing something for streamers? Get fucked! None of those fucks is important. DSP the very least.

Why can't he get it into his head that people just don't care for GoW?
Taking a look at the top streamer for it right now: LIRIK. 21k viewers. That guy can play whatever and his audience will watch. Everyone else currently is Russian or Chinese and the next biggest stream of the game is some Spaniard called axelcapo at 8k viewers. Also a typical variety streamer that usually plays LoL.
Looks like nobody tuned in specifically for GoW.
He's also got to realise that his audience isn't the same as all other audiences. Summit1G can play whatever on occasion but he's got to keep CS around. Tyler1 needs LoL or Overwatch. MaximilianDude needs fitan. Pigroach needs getting his ass beat in Street Fighter. No way around that. I bet he'd easily be one of the most viewed SFV players right now, just under ImStillDaDaddy, Smug, Punk and Poongko.

Street Fighter was his guaranteed pay check. PUBG won't replace it.

[Guest]

DSP still hasn't gotten over his initial, "popularity." Back in the day he could play whatever he wanted to and people would watch but now there's so much saturation of the market that he's got to find his niche.

He's too, "busy," to look around at the competition, though.

[rabidtictac]

He's viewquitting God of War starting tomorrow or the next day, in favor of PUBG, Ultra SFII and Bloodborne.

You and I have both said it, Kugel. If he would just give people what they want from him, he would get attention and money. But his ego won't take it and HE doesn't want to play any game HE doesn't enjoy. He can't enjoy SFV because he'd get his ass beat constantly at this point. He can enjoy USFII because it's one of maybe 3 fightan games he can play ok and he can just spam shit he learned 25 years ago. He has the most boring play style I've ever seen btw. He never takes a chance on a fun character. When the chips are down and he wants that win? He runs to the most boring, basic bitch character imaginable, like Ryu, Ken or Dee Jay. As much as I like Rose in USFIV, she is that kind of character too. She's very easy to take the momentum with and just maintain a life lead doing very safe shit. I never see DSP gamble on a character like Motoko, Rolento, Alex, Hugo or Viper.

DSP has also apparently been ducking the DLC for Bloodborne, which was the whole reason people wanted him to fucking replay Bloodborne. It'll be interesting (read: pathetic) to see if he actually ends his LP without doing the DLC.

[Angelfire Memes]

I imagine he'll go into the Old Hunters eventually, probably when he's abusively overlevelled and has enough paypigs holding his hand. As it's a NG run he'll probably get through Ludwig at least. I'd wager wanting to see him take on Orphan of Kos is like 90% of the reason his views are so high for that playthrough.

He already tried to go into the DLC once and got bodied hard, pulling his meme of "the only people who told me to go into the DLC are trolls and idiots trying to make me look bad" and taking his ass back into the main game in a sulk.

[Le Redditeur]

I recently took on Dark Souls 3 and decided to run a caster build. I thought that the best weapon for that build was the Moonlight Greatsword, which unfortunately is hidden between two late game bosses (Dancer of the Boreal Valley and Oceiros the Consumed King). Thankfully, those bosses can be accessed on early game, in fact before killing the first "normal" boss, but I was sure I wouldn't manage to do that, so I proceed to clear the two initial areas (Wall of Lothric and Undead Settlement) to get enough items to be able to take on those bosses.

So, here am I, Soul Level 30, trying to kill the damn Dancer of the Boreal Valley (who is resistant to both Fire and Magic damage, fuck), and I find out that I suck at dodging her seemingly slow feint+attacks. I get massacred on her first phase, dying around 40 times or so until I finally get a grip and manage to hit second phase (which was supposed to be harder, but I find relatively easy because she loses her damn instakill grab attack). So, after sucking for three nights straight, I manage to beat the Dancer. Yay, now I climb to Lothric Castle and got for Oceiros... and I'm immediately fucked hard by the first Cathedral Knight enemy in the stage. Damn, I suck at this game! I farm for enough materials so I can upgrade my weapon and catalyst to +6, but try not to overlevel because now I'm pissed that people on YT manage to kill those shitheads at SL 1. I slug my way through the Consumed King's Garden, until I finally get to Oceiros. Now, I confess, the only way I manage to kill him is by cheesing, but hey, a victory is a victory.

Moral of the story: Soul-like games are an exercise of patience/autism, and while Phil is fairly autistic, he has no patience. "I can be good at games if I want!", His Goutyness once said, but it's fairly obvious that he can't, because he has no drive, no dedication, no physical reflexes, no 20/20 vision, nothing. He's just a lazy fat fuck who wants to play AAA walking simulators one after the other, the shorter the better.

[mad bum]

Why can't he get it into his head that people just don't care for GoW?
Taking a look at the top streamer for it right now: LIRIK. 21k viewers. That guy can play whatever and his audience will watch. Everyone else currently is Russian or Chinese and the next biggest stream of the game is some Spaniard called axelcapo at 8k viewers. Also a typical variety streamer that usually plays LoL.
Looks like nobody tuned in specifically for GoW.

Pretty much this, being a """""successful""""" streamer is having your audience loyal and stupid with there money, and by loyal I mean tuning into whatever you play because they like you.

[Kugelfisch]

Go search YT for "[insert streamer] reacts to". People will watch those guys view dumb videos and shit. Just hammering home what everyone but Phil has known for years: It's not the games, it's him.

[Pepsi Man]

I'd watch a completely self aware DSP that made his schtick finding creative ways to blame the game when he does bad as a form of trolling for people who aren't familiar with his content.