Pat the NES Cunt

Whine and Bitch about people long after they become interesting to talk about
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by BobbyBoucher » Tue Jan 22, 2019 12:01 pm

Another update for Pat "Dead Career" Contri:
  • cupodcast 140:
    • right at start: "hopefully the podcast police won't come after us this time"
    • Pat bought Smash Bros. Ultimate
      • He's played Smash 4 on Wii U four times, Brawl once, and dislikes Melee.
        • Dude's career is fucked.
    • during carlton dance lawsuit segment, pat it's not fair use because they were making money from the dance
      • might want to rethink that Pat, considering your book
    • during heroes of the storm discussion, pat and ian express sympathy for gamers when Blizzard suddenly drops a game
      • what changed?
    • On the epic games store topic, steam will "just have to" lower their 30% cut
      • origin, Uplay, and gog didn't cause that to happen, why would Epic?
    • pat thinks there are 3 different game storefronts/launchers not including gog
      • Steam, Uplay, Origin, Discord, Epic,
        • That's 6.
        • Add GOG, Humble Bundle, and the Microsoft Store, you're up to 9.
        • Pat does not play games.
    • I think pat said Die Hard is a christmas movie (maybe in Q&A section)
      • he's wrong, of course, it's not about Christmas. It takes place during it.
  • not so common: 2018 year in review
    • pat broke his iphone
      • didn't back up his contacts (other youtubers)
      • didn't back up pictures either
      • almost locked out of twitch due to missing his google authenticator
      • had a text file for his wifi password on his phone
        • uses eero wifi, the products he shills for (and ate blue apron when he shilled for them)
      • Pat asks why no sd cards on iphones?
        • Because Apple profits greatly by overcharging for storage upgrades.
    • Pat has a macbook air
      • has bootcamp, but hasn't logged into Mac OS X for a year.
      • why they hell did he buy a Mac then?
    • pat had a nasty breakup at the start of 2018
    • termite tented his house
      • Cost is $1 to $4 per square foot from what I could see.
        • So, $2280 to $9120.
    • formed llc which took some months
      • has a payroll
    • Pat is still executive producing an indie game (and may be advising a second one).
      • Still executive producing that Not For Resale documentary.
    • Pat objects to being called a "YouTuber".
    • april youtube changes caused 25-30% drop in views in old and new videos
      • friend of his said a video only a got a quarter of what it normally would
    • He says that Wired article on him was two years in the making.
      • Considers the guy who wrote it like a friend. Confused about negative take on it.
    • Pat mentions trump just so he can segue to talking about his santa claus history.
      • Pat's Aunt Jo died in 2006 of brain aneuryism.
        • refused to wear a track suit she bought. he apparently didn't realize people use them as loungewear.
      • Rather than living in the past, he probably should have formed a family and lived vicariously through his children.
    • Pat complains about the post office on Twitter.
      • Maybe they hate him because he mails out 50 of his books at a time?
  • cu podcast 141:
    • pat said he should get a t-shirt with a list of all the youtubers he's had on the podcast who betrayed him
    • had a rough time last New Years (probably because of breakup)
    • pat had an iphone 6s, had water damage, so need to replace
      • says he highly depends on phone for personal and businesses reasons, so he decided to buy a refurbished iPhone
      • His "business" consists of recording podcasts. He doesn't need to travel if he doesn't want to.
    • CU Podcast might be going weekly.
    • ian had his spirit shattered from being mocked as a kid
      • these two have arrested development
    • pat & ian think its wrong for Twitch to advertise their most popular streamer's New Year's event
      • despite the fact that really only fans of both Fortnite and Ninja would watch it
      • people watching titty-streamers aren't going to switch over
      • Besides that, Ninja is basically subsiding all the no-view losers out there.
      • and Pat thinks Twitch Prime ended for some reason
    • They talked about Black Mirror's Bandersnatch, but I'm planing/playing on watching that, so skipped it.
      • bet he said something stupid about the zx spectrum
  • cu podcast 142:
    • "might be going weekly" turned out to be "immediately"
    • pat open complaining about jake paul and how he's a 21 year old who looks 32.
      • this coming from a guy who looks 55
      • Pat "shitcoin salesman" Contri then lectures about ethics of online gambling sites
    • in madbox console segment
      • pat suggests game streaming (like Onlive) might be the future of gaming, especially in developing countries
        • no, it isn't pat. The US has data caps and the developing world is too poor.
      • Pat is on fiber optic now (It's AT&T, he pays $80/month for gigabit service.)
    • Pat only owns three or four Xbox 360 games.
    • Pat complains about news sites advertising a sketchy pirate handheld.
      • Does not realize irony of his shitcoin promotion scamming his listeners.
    • pat probably had a usa up all night spank tape
  • cu podcast 143:
    • Ian saw Robocop for the first time in hist last week. (He liked it, at least.)
    • They call Randy Pitchford a scumbag or something.
    • Pat brings up Global Warming here, probably because he hasn't been doing his Not So Common Podcast.
    • Pat plays Zynga Texas Hold 'em on his phone.
      • I guess this is the only modern gaming he does.
    • During the segment on the Alien mobile game, Pat and Ian again bring up the Diablo Immortal announcement.
      • They say their stance was justifiable because Blizzard announced weeks before there would be no Diablo 4 trailer. (Some fans might have expected a Diablo II port.)
      • They don't bring up how they insulted the redshirt guy. Or the audience, which definitely didn't try out the demoes at the event.
      • Or that the Blizzard representatives majorly mishandled the whole thing ("Do you guys not have phones?").
      • The fact is he got up on stage to do this big spiel for a mobile game. Of course people expected something different.
      • Pat rants about outrage culture even though he covers PewDiePie and Logan Paul for the clicks (I hadn't even heard of PDP until Pat brought him up on the podcast).
    • He also makes some vague references to an interview.
      • ReviewTechUSA had interview with pat, critiqued him, then cancelled an interview or something because of the whole Diablo Immortal thing?
        • Click hungry coward says Ian.
        • "ashamed to call myself a man", says Pat.
        • "slimeballish"
        • ReviewTech's criticisms were quite reasonable, making Pat's rage inappropriate.
    • Pat says Nintendo should hire him since he has a better idea of what Japanese exclusive SNES games should be available on their online shop.
      • He also says he hasn't played Starfox 2 yet. (He should've done that on an emulator a decade ago.)
    • Ian hasn't played Assassin's Creed series.
      • His friend says II is good, no one likes III, IV is fine. (His friend is probably right.)
    • Pat gloats because Verizon and Amazon announced game streaming plans.
      • Doesn't solve bandwidth cap problems. Users would be streaming high quality 60p video that won't compress well.
    • Ian thinks Zelda Link to the Past is overrated.
    • They suggest creating "dead career" t-shirts.
    • Pat mocks that he's "betrayed retro gamers" by saying obsessed collectors may want to seek a different hobby.
    • They discuss the '84 and other elections for some resason.
    • The next marathon is in February (9th or 10th maybe).
  • Pat's editor is this Kieran guy:
He also put out a new Pat the NES Punk video. You probably wouldn't notice it on his YouTube page since it's buried under the podcast videos. The whole thing is a reference to the Diablo Immortal reaction ("blizzard of negative responses"). He's taking swings at ReviewTechUSA, I guess. And the whole thing is: "hey, a game on a weaker platform can be okay!" (except a touchscreen is nothing like a controller).

I can't believe I used to defend this guy. He went from an oddball with okay opinions on video games to obsessed lunatic who won't abandon certain topics of discussion. He's a combination of LordKat and Spoony.

Pat is completely out of touch with modern gaming. Or even the next stage of retro gaming. He has hit a "podcasting wall". He's running out of things to talk about. Pat's show will gradually become the "capeshit/wrestling podcast".

This new weekly format is only going to accelerate his implosion. He's going to to keep covering topics over and over again. Referencing the Diablo incident again and again. He's going to crack.

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by mad bum » Tue Jan 22, 2019 2:01 pm

How does it feel pat to get backstabed and used? I cannot believe he actually trusted Rich,, how fucking naive.

Also his doom review was nothing but a 10 minute commercial for his snes book. Pat is obviously nervous about the success of this one because he's late to the party with so many other books about it already out.
"Dude, 5 moves, I'm sitting on your arm until it's snapping. But to each their own."


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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Tue Jan 22, 2019 4:43 pm

Ironic he bitches about YouTubers betraying him, when one of the first things he did when becoming more popular was screw over Guru Larry.

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Tue Jan 22, 2019 5:06 pm

Pat dislikes Melee? He's dead to me.

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by ThatGuy » Tue Jan 22, 2019 9:42 pm

Pat burned then pissed on all his bridges, and the less said about Ian, the better

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Kugelfisch » Wed Jan 23, 2019 7:54 pm

Him keeping mentioning the Diablo thing is just plain sad. Everyone has forgotten and moved on, he'll keep bringing that up over and over again.
Reminds me strongly of LardKat mentioning time and time again how Spoon's "BETRAYAL" did cost him that Notch interview.
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Marzie desperately wants to feel ProJared's cock and everyone directly involved in the IN universe is an insane mess.

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Le Redditeur » Wed Jan 23, 2019 8:36 pm

The worst part about the Betrayal fiasco was not that LK thought it costed him the Notch interview (that's plausible at least, although Notch probably just wanted to tell those internet nobodies to piss off), but that this one single interview was his gateway to the gaming industry.

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by CIANIgger » Thu Jan 24, 2019 11:38 am


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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Thu Jan 24, 2019 11:47 am

>I think pat said Die Hard is a christmas movie

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Thu Jan 24, 2019 11:51 am

Le Redditeur wrote:
Wed Jan 23, 2019 8:36 pm
but that this one single interview was his gateway to the gaming industry.
If LordObesity wanted to get into gayming journalism so bad he should have known what to do; polish Anita's boots with his tongue like the rest of those subhumans

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