Pat the NES Cunt

Whine and Bitch about people long after they become interesting to talk about
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mad bum
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by mad bum » Thu Aug 15, 2019 4:13 am

I found a candidate for Pat's cousin: ZombiUnicorn.
I could see that, in which case his whole family is nothing but a bunch of con artists.
Pat expects NES prices to drastically fall.
No way in hell will NES games ever be $1 again, even in 10 years nintendo will still be something resellers will garage sale for and buy up because it's an easy as fuck sell even if the profit margins are small. NES game prices are going down because of the NES classic but now that it's gone I expect prices to start climbing back up again soonish.
ian's happy handhelds not happening
These guys will do anything to avoid actual work, my guess is they don't even split the profits 50/50 since Pat is such a jewbag.
Warehouse for his books had to be restocked.
Truck broke down.
Sold out of book at convention.
That's bad news because it sounds like the book will actually fund his house.
Ian "37 year-old game store clerk" Ferguson
Ian "$15 is good enough" Ferguson
"Dude, 5 moves, I'm sitting on your arm until it's snapping. But to each their own."

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Kugelfisch
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Kugelfisch » Thu Aug 15, 2019 12:33 pm

Anyone complaining abut "gatekeeping" is nothing but a faggot that should fuck off. You don't get to be something just because you claim you are (also looking at you, transfaggots). You don't get to pick and mix how much credibility you have in any field just because you want it that way. Get fucked, Pat.
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Thu Aug 15, 2019 11:34 pm

Holy shit, Pat's 40!

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mad bum
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by mad bum » Thu Aug 15, 2019 11:59 pm

"Dude, 5 moves, I'm sitting on your arm until it's snapping. But to each their own."

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Pepsi Man
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Pepsi Man » Fri Aug 16, 2019 12:00 am

Kugelfisch wrote:
Thu Aug 15, 2019 12:33 pm
Anyone complaining abut "gatekeeping" is nothing but a faggot that should fuck off. You don't get to be something just because you claim you are (also looking at you, transfaggots). You don't get to pick and mix how much credibility you have in any field just because you want it that way. Get fucked, Pat.
It's more the way they're using it, honestly. Gatekeeping can be pretty annoying (SEE: Smash players who insist Melee is the holy grail of gaming and how dare you enjoy Sm4sh or Brawl) but these guys seem to think, "I expect you to know who Mario is if you're going to call yourself a gamer," is, "gatekeeping."

It's like asking your math teacher what 2+2 is and they tell you it's 5 and then complain when you question their credentials.
Guest wrote:Poopy Man

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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Guest » Fri Aug 16, 2019 12:22 am

Gaykeeping in theory is to keep the retards out but in practice (at least with e-celebs) gaykeeping is meant to keep the circlejerk going among the no nothing numbnuts.

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Kugelfisch
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Kugelfisch » Fri Aug 16, 2019 2:30 am

Pepsi Man wrote:
Fri Aug 16, 2019 12:00 am
Gatekeeping can be pretty annoying (SEE: Smash players who insist Melee is the holy grail of gaming
There's a reason the term "tourneyfags" was created for them. It's only annoying if you want to be respected by them and why would you? Let them sperg while they get bullied by a single Puff player and are so assblasted about it that they constantly want to ban the character just for one guy. :lol:

Because what does gatekeeping really mean? Do the Melee tourneyfags hinder you from playing any other Smash? Could they even hinder you from playing Melee? If you can suffer their stench, they have no weapons against you. They fucking hate Hungrybox and yet they've had his balls firmly in their mouths for years because there isn't shit they can do about him because he's legit good.
However, the ones crying about gatekeeping are those that don't cut it in any way. They have no skills, they have no knowledge, they have no business being in the fandom/hobby they want to decorate themselves with. They want respect for nothing and cry about it with bullshit terms when they don't get to enforce their will to be fake shits over others.

And finally, who the fuck wants to be called a Gaymur anyway?
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Pepsi Man » Fri Aug 16, 2019 2:58 am

Kugelfisch wrote:
Fri Aug 16, 2019 2:30 am
It's only annoying if you want to be respected by them
People take Melee gatekeeping seriously enough that someone threw an actual crab at Hungrybox. It's not, "man, I can't get the taste of his dick out of my mouth-- ban his character." It's always been worse than that and his reactions to the constant barrage of hate he's gotten over the years should make that pretty clear, especially considering the dude actually has a pretty thick skin.

No, I don't care if they respect me and yes I will continue to say that they're annoying. It's not even a strong enough word for them but it's the only one that can capture even a small amount of my disdain.
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Kugelfisch
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by Kugelfisch » Fri Aug 16, 2019 2:16 pm

If that's the worst thing that happenend in all those years being in locations full of unwashed autists that hate him, that's pretty tame shit.
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Re: Pat the NES Cunt

Post by BobbyBoucher » Mon Aug 26, 2019 3:28 am

Time for a somewhat quicker update to Pat "One-man Nerd Crew Contri", since Pat is basically running solo while Ian is on vacation.


cupodcast 173 (partially recorded at a gaming con with Ian):
  • another shitcoin ad
  • long island retro gaming expo
    • pat says the nyc boroughs aren't part of long island.
      • (Perhaps he meant culturally because Brooklyn and Queens definitely are on Long Island.)
    • pat says the only reason people don't think NY pizza is the best is because they haven't had it
      • I've lived near there. The quality of pizza varies by restaurant. Some are great, some okay, some bad.
      • There are just so many mom and pops that good pizza can be found. There's enough variety for any palette.
      • And the rent is so high in NYC that only the best should survive.
    • pat's flight apparently was hit by a fuel tanker
      • but not with him on it
      • he then relates a story of the flight being delayed
      • it would matter if he had an actual job
    • pat bought a beeshu controller
    • pat bought a konami top gun game
  • video game displays taken down at walmart
    • We're in the mouth of madness in [Current Year], says Pat.
    • Pat says we can't agree on objective reality.
      • He believe Russian collusion actually happened.
      • It's objectively a fact that most gun crime is black-on-black as part of criminal and gang activities. Gun control in states like New Jersey and Illinois hasn't actually done anything about it.
      • Gun control won't stop someone from building a bomb or driving a truck through a crowd.
    • He thinks it's funny they still sell guns.
      • Probably because the firearms buyers represent a source of income for Walmart.
        • And, as digital distribution takes over, games and even movies will represent less of Walmart's revenue.
          • So, they are making the correct business choice, Pat.
  • Endangered species act weakening
    • pat says 99% of endangered species in the US have been saved. (Some of that was just pure luck, obviously. Some were threatened by factors humans had nothing to do with.)
  • duck tales pulled
    • most PlayStation games Ian buys are digital. (He should be worried about his job.)
      • lost mr. driller somehow
    • pat keeps complaining about blood sport t-shirt despite now having it
      • wants interest
  • pink gorilla paid $13,000 for NWC cart
    • "Cody was nice enough to say 'this is worth money'," says pat.
    • sold again within 24 hours of purchasing it.
    • Ian thinks Pink Gorilla got $20k for it.
    • Ten years ago, some guy at Luna traded an NWC for some cables.
      • Ian didn't realize it until going through the games later.
      • He should've just taken the game and hidden it from Traig, his much younger boss.
  • TG-16 mini update
    • Pat doesn't recognized The Genji and Heike clans. (Good GCCX episode.)
    • Pat finally learns the TG-16 mini has two USB ports, so no turbo tap is needed.
    • Audience tells pat that most people experienced TG-16 games with the Wii online store, not his videos.
  • snes/nes online switch
    • Apparently, people complain about NES games being on the Switch's pay service. They don't like NES games or something.
      • (Pat had better dump his games as quickly as possible.)
    • Pat makes reference to people complaining about cartoon characters being unfuckable. (Quartering reference?)
  • investors buying retro games
    • Pat actually has good observations.
      • This is a reminder his strength was always in retro game collecting. Not that it will help him as the market changes.
    • (The only truly rare video games are prototypes.)
      • That's what these investors should be buying. Not the common releases, but the ultra-rare betas and prototype cartridges.
        • They should also buy hardware prototypes like the SNES-CD/PlayStation.
        • Once these (((collectors))) figure that out, expect prototype auctions to hit $100k.
        • The only reason some comics can be so valuable is that rich people, like Hollywood actors/directors, want to buy them.
          • Generic copies of Final Fantasy 6 won't sell for that much.
          • The only thing that can are rare prototypes that people heard about but were never released publicly.
        • They should also be going after rare arcade/pinball machines.
          • Those are something physical. Even with a ROM dump, they can't quite be replicated.
          • And the grading scheme could be based on percentage of original parts. If repairs/replacements were done from other machines or parts from the era or if it uses new parts.
            • It would suck for hobbyists, but it would at least make logical sense.
    • Pat gatekeeps Danielle from game collecting.
      • Says collectors like her got into it recently and acquired knowledge quickly from somewhere.
        • Just like Pat does every week on his podcast. He frequently talks about subjects he has no knowledge of.
    • Danielle was apparently slightly miffed Pat got a sticker-sealed Mario box for $30.
    • A grader/seller said Pat's opened sticker-sealed Gyromite might auction for $40-50k.
      • Pat said he'd take it. I can't blame him.
      • Same one only sold one or two sealed games at the convention.
    • Pat turned down $100k for NWC gold cart.
      • Pat "Don't buy a sealed Mario for 100 grand; buy my gold NWC for 200 grand" Contri
      • Pat "Buy my tulips" Contri
  • tales from the game store
    • Summary: "collectionist" knows nothing about games.
    • Ian takes issue with the phrase "chinese bootlegs," saying not all bootlegs are Chinese.
      • Probably 95% of bootlegs are Chinese, remaining 5% are from Southeast Asia.
      • So I'd cut the guy some slack there at least.
  • q&a why do youtubers burn out
    • algorithm changes
      • Pat mentioned old videos doing a lot less than norm.
        • Instead of 150k views, only getting 50k, he says.
    • Mentions Mark Bussler (Classic Game Room) quitting
      • didn't try hard enough. Should have tried Twitch streaming/podcasting.
      • The podcasts he did do were behind paywalls. Those should have been free and his doodles should have been Patreon rewards.
      • I think he got depressed because he couldn't match his father's success (sold a company to AutoDesk for millions).
    • Algorithm favors echo chamber, says Pat.
      • Angry gamers who came after him. Last Jedi haters.
      • Pat "I fucking love the MCU" Contri is in an echo chamber.
        • Repeats Kotaku/Waypoint shit. Supports game unions, but uses Uber.
    • Pat started podcast because NES Punk wasn't paying the billth.
  • Ends with another shitcoin ad.

cupodcast 174 (pat shills the MCU hard):
  • solo pat edition
  • SNES book being printed.
    • Has to approve prototype covers.
    • pays his writers "unlike some authors" (reference to retro gaming mag from Mike Kennedy? I think Pat wrote some articles for it.)
    • by end of year, pat may have patreon poll to decide on next book
  • august 20th
    • anniversary of pat moving to san diego in 2009
    • made business deal for money for condo
      • only afforded due to housing crash
    • his game collection got 4 times larger since the move
    • he met a girl he thought would be "the one" but it didn't work out
      • Was that the Denise woman from his vids? Someone made a podcast saying she went to conventions with him.
  • video game heist at Trade-N-Games
    • There was a safe and alarm, but no camera inside on the safe or outside on the building?
      • One or several people moved a 500 pound safe and got away within the 5 minutes it took the police to respond.
      • Owner conveniently showed off his collection on YouTube to prove to insurance company he owned it.
      • Sounds like an inside job.
    • Pat reads list of stolen games to make himself seem like an expert.
    • Pat says he'll "help" the owner by sending him a carton of books.
    • Pat says collectors might want to invest in security since now criminals know games are valuable.
      • Jokes that if people can buy pitbulls, he should be able to buy a lynx or caracal.
      • The reality is that criminals will learn that fencing rare games is difficult.
        • Extremely rare games may have unique identifiers (writng/numbering on NWC, label/box damage/markings).
        • So, ideally they would obtain moderately rare/in-demand games.
    • Pats worried someone might come after his collection.
      • Patrick Buononcontri of San Diego, has a large, expensive game collection.
      • However, he keeps expensive stuff like the NWC carts in a bank safe.
        • But those would be impossible to fence, anyway.
      • He probably has a Magical Chase in his house, though.
        • https://www.twitch.tv/videos/431618482? ... &sort=time
          • Pat showed it off in this video at the 25 minute mark.
            • It's a replacement case.
              • Wait, so it did he get repro after catigating 8-bit Guy for recommending them?
            • So his copy is worth $3k or so.
              • The manual might be real (at least $1k value) if he bought it separately or the seller had it.
        • Just grab any TurboGrafx game that it's in there. The CD ones as well.
        • He should also have a gaming PC and MacBook.
        • He probably also has Little Samson and Suprise at Dinosaur Peak.
        • He has an m82 unit worth around $3k.
        • My guess is the games and electronics in his house are worth $50k.
  • Genesis mini/classic
    • Pat says Haunting Starring Polterguy would never happen on SNES because it was too weird.
      • There were plenty of weird SNES games.
        • There was Lester the Unlikely, Captain Novolin, some others.
    • Pat will be getting a free Gensis mini for "review".
  • Pat advertises for Mint Mobile.
    • Got free service/sim card for this sponsorship.
    • [Think he uses Verizon normally. So he's just using Mint for data while traveling, I guess?]
  • new Masters of universe series.
    • Pat uses as excuse to talk about toys he had.
    • She-ra reboot
      • Pat says there were some weirdos saying She-Ra wasn't sexy enough. (The Quartering?)
        • I think the original She-Ra was an adult, so maybe Jeremy had a point?
    • Pat sexualizes the Teela action figure.
    • Pat thinks it will be like Fuller House where all the actors are there at start then leave.
      • He's wrong. Actors leave to do other projects. TV actors are usually only on one show at a time, depending on filming schedule.
      • Voice actors record lines in one session, then it's animated. They do multiple projects simultaneously.
      • So they could stick around a lot longer.
    • Pat wants another GI Joe series. Says DiC series sucked.
      • Reminder: Pat wants to display his GI Joe toys.
    • Pixel Dan's toy reviews are being used for how He-Man characters should look in new cartoon.
  • Intellivision Amico trailer.
    • Pat's probably right in his criticisms, but the problems should be obvious to almost anyone.
      • The hardcore gaming segment are the only ones willing to shell out for a new console.
      • Casual players use phones, tablets, or even smart TVs.
      • This the same problem with the Ouya, Atari VCS, and Stadia.
      • Anyone with a little know-how would be better off with a Raspberry Pi.
    • pat wants a living room like in the trailer.
    • "there should be more point and click games out there," says pat.
      • There have been a few like Thimbleweed Park and the upcoming The Crimson Diamond. He'd know this if he kept up on gaming.
    • Pat says this should have come out 10-12 years ago to hit the nostalgia demographic.
      • The same is true for his proposed Game Boy book.
        • The GB generation is basically the NES generation and that's already falling off.
        • Beyond that, most GB were rather primitive and not worth a second glance.
        • He should do a super-guidebook covering GB, GBC, and GBA. Do more than 80 reviews this time. At least 500 should be possible.
          • One of his own favorite NES games, Three Stooges, has a GBA port. You'd think he'd know that.
  • return to the flea market
    • 13 episodes left of flea market madness
    • game seller keeping NES games in the back. PS2 games up front.
    • picked up a little giant ladder for $80
  • right before end, pat edits in some news hot off the wire!
    • sony/disney call it quits!
      • predictably, pat sides with disney, saying they got only 5% of the profits for doing all the work.
        • Apparently, that 5% is only for the first day.
      • Pat is, once again, completely wrong.
        • Sony had previously traded away the merchandising/theme park rights to disney to get rid of some usage fees. Disney makes mad cash off that.
        • Disney also has the TV rights to Spiderman.
        • Disney also profits from using Spider-Man in their own movies.
        • And from what I understand, Sony paid 100% for the previous movies, yet Disney gets a 5% cut.
          • Guess what, Pat? Investors get profits from investments.
            • Disney is a contract employee.
          • Disney paying 50% of the cost would make them co-owner.
            • They could then try to dictate where it gets distributed (their new streaming service).
            • They would get long-term profits and not just 5% from the first day.
            • This is an incredibly aggressive power move on Disney's part.
              • Sony was right not to take it. Sony knows how investments work, Pat doesn't.
          • Pat hired someone to fix up his house. Maybe they should get 50% of his house?
            • The guys who built your house did all the work while you just paid for it, Pat.
            • Pat only wrote 80 reviews for the SNES guide book. Maybe the other writers should have 50% ownership of it?
      • And it's not like the Amazing spider-man films failed, they just didn't make a billion dollars each.
      • it's fucking appalling how these degenerates are so invested in a children's film series. Plenty of good movies failed at the box office due to these idiots.
      • the sooner this whole house of cards collapses, the better.
    • also, GameStop fired some people.
  • q&a does pat ever deal with trolls in real life
    • says he's encounted rude/drunk/trolls a dozen times.
    • only reason people troll is that there's something wrong in their lives, he says.
    • someone named albert einstein approached him "meekly" and asked to be unbanned
      • said he didn't know what he did to deserve banning on youtube.
    • jay had to threaten to fight someone in real life at some convention
      • pat says he's prepared to fight. "is this a mutual combat state?" he asks
      • Pat "fight me in real life" contri
    • [jesus christ pat, people for hundreds of years have trolled each other using the written word]
      • people used to send insulting letters responding to magazines/newspapers
Last edited by BobbyBoucher on Mon Aug 26, 2019 4:04 am, edited 1 time in total.

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